What am I if my neck is covered in red bumps, my ears are the size of a giant corn cob, my skin is ruby red, my eyes are bloodshot, I have green skin, and fur growing all over my body? Horribly ugly.

Why are Chinese so good at jay-walking? Cause they can’t tell the difference between green and red light with their tiny eyes.

What’s green and smells like bacon?

Kermit’s finger.

What fruit is square and green? a lemon in disguise