Best Jokes

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5 April: Top today:

So theres a orphan in a hospital and the doctor walks up and says “sorry kid but this is a family hospital”

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Doctors jokes
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I named my dog 5-Miles so now I tell people I walk 5-Miles everyday

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Puns jokes
5 April: Job jokes:

I just got a job at the prison library. It has its prose and cons.

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A girl walked into a job interview. The interviewer said “you are what we are looking for, but i need to test your skills. ” he hands her a pen He said “sell me this pen” She puts in between her boobs.

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5 April: Computer jokes:

Where did the software developer go?! I don’t know, he ransomware!

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5 April: Family jokes:

What do you call you’re daughter’s boyfriend when he brings her back past 10pm?

An ambulance

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5 April: Dream jokes:

Why do black men have nightmares?

Because the only one that had a dream got shot.

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A man was having a dream. He dreamt about a mystical creature that was commonly known as the god of toast. When the man woke up, he turned to tell his wife about the dream. When he delivers the toast god punch line, his wife shrugged as she faced the opposite direction to the man. The man turned around also and started sobbing as he realised his marriage is in shambles

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Last Night I had a dream I was swimming in lemonade… turns out I peed the bed.

What’s a spider-man’s dream job? Web developer

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5 April: Bar jokes:

So a neutron went to a bar, he asked the bartender how much for a beer, the bartender said, " For you, NO charge."

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Helvetica and Times New Roman walk into a bar… “GET OUT OF HERE!!!” The Bartender shouts we don’t serve your type!

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5 April: Doctors jokes:

So a doctor walks into the room with a dying patient. He looks the man up and down and says gravely: “I’m sorry, you only have ten left.” The other man smiles nervously and asks, “T-ten what doc? Hours? Days? Weeks?” The doctor calmly looks at him. “Nine.”

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My doctor said “you have 1year to live”

I said " you wanna bet"

Bam a gun shot

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5 April: Green jokes:

What’s green and smells like bacon?

Kermit’s finger.

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When do you go on red and stop at green A watermelon

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What NFL teams parts with James Charles!?

Green bay packers & New England Patriots

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5 April: Lost jokes:

I lost at Kahoot so I had to ka-shoot

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5 April: High jokes:

What talks high pitched and can’t fly?

A gay man in Iran

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What do you call a group of depressed kids with guns

The suicide squad

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