Best Jokes
NINA YOU BETTER RUN TO HELL YOUR GOING THERE ANYWAY!!! YOU DONT BE MEAN TO ALEX!!! HE IS SWEET KIND LOVING AND PROTECTIVE!!!
| Hell jokes |
Yo girl…do you like squirrels, because i’m about to nut in your hole
| Nut jokes |
One day Little Johnny’s class is having an English lesson. The teacher asks them, “Who can use the word intelligent in a sentence?” Little Mary says, “The teacher is very intelligent.” The teacher asks them, “Who can use the word fashionable in a sentence?” Little Suzie says, “They are very fashionable.” The teacher says, “Johnny, why don’t you have a go? Use the word dictate in a sentence.” Johnny thinks for a moment and then says, "Last night I heard Daddy asking Mommy ‘Darling how does my dictate’ "
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I’ll never forget my sister’s last word. “Is it edible?”
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I wish i could be as visible as my depression is.
My future is so bright, i need a flashlight to see where i’m going
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I am a failure to everyone and decided to attemp a suicide, guess what? I failed
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Michael Jakson gets really ill so he’s rushed to hospital. When they get there he says ‘am i in heaven?’ The doctor replies ‘Nah sir we’re just taking a quick shortcut through the children’s ward.’
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You know why I don’t buy Velcro items anymore?
They are a total rip off.
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Why did the blind man fall down the well?
He just couldn’t see that well.
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How does a crazy person get to the woods?
He takes the psychopath.
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What is the worst part of milking a cow?
The smell of the dairy air.
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Why do orphans eat cerial with water? Because their daddy still hasn’t come home with the milk
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Life is like a box of chocolate, it doesn’t last long if you’re fat
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Fun fact: The body positivity movement, is the only movement without any actual movement
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My daughter has gotten to the age where she asks me embarrassing questions about sex. Just this morning she asked me “is that the best you can do?”
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Daughter: I know this is weird but I feel like that someone is watching me when I am sleeping.
Father: Sorry
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It kept getting side-tracked.
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A school bus full of screaming children.
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