You know whats the worst about having a daughter with cancer? You can’t pull her hair when you hit it from the back

“Dad, how do stars die?” – “Usually an overdose.”

Dinosaurs are like my dad. I never got the see either of them and they are now extinct

I’d tell a joke about my abusive dad but I only remember the punch line.

The weirdest thing happened yesterday. My dad came back from work…

He’s a suicide bomber.