Best Jokes

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17 October: Top today:

All you need is a Razor Blade in life.

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Life jokes
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I’ll never forget my sister’s last word. “Is it edible?”

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Family jokes
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What was stephan Hawkins last words\windows10shutting down

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Dark Humor
17 October: Job jokes:

I went for a job interview today and the manager said, “We’re looking for someone who is responsible.”

“Well, I’m your man.” I replied, “In my last job, whenever anything went wrong, they said I was responsible.”

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What would be a good job for a fat person? A four-chin teller!!

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17 October: Hit jokes:

Girls are like blackjack you shoot for 21 but I keep hitting 14

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17 October: Sea jokes:

What did one ocean say to the other ocean? nothing, they just WAVED. can you SEA what i did there? im SHORE you did. Why are you so SALTY? dont be a BEACH.

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17 October: Paint jokes:

I when to the orphans to paint a picture of there parents so they can actually talk to them

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One Tuesday afternoon Little Jonny Decides he wants extra Homework So he went to his teacher and said,Hello can I have extra homework this week and the teacher replied with,Sure be at my house Friday afternoon to cut my lawn, Polish the counters,Scrub the Baseboards,Scrub and paint the walls! And johnny replied with,That’s not what I Ment but at least I’ll get paid! And The Teacher said, How about 200 each job? Johnny replied with,OK (Friday afternoon at her house After Johnny Does all the jobs he asked for his payment and the teacher laughed and said, You do know that Tuesday was April fools day right?

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17 October: Doctors jokes:

I am still trying to figure out why paying the covid doctors a complement is so offensive. They even kicked me out and all I said was to stay positive…

An apple a day can do so much more than keep the doctor away… it can keep ANYONE away.

If you throw it hard enough.

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Patient to doctor "will I be ok Doc?" Doctor: "I doubt it. Mercury is in Uranus now" Patient: "I dont do that astrology stuff" Doctor:“Nor me. My thermometer just broke”

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17 October: Hope jokes:

This Dwarf was being mean to me so I said “when you get home I hope Snow White kicks the shit out of you.”

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17 October: Fire jokes:

I pushed an orphan in a wheelchair into a fire and yelled hot wheels

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Hey God what are you making?

Just a wooden stick that lights on fire

Sounds like a match made in heaven

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17 October: Transport jokes:

To become a licensed, airline pilot requires 1,500 hours (two years) of training. But it only takes 10 seconds to steal the pilot’s jacket and hat.

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Today; Worst day ever

My annoying sibling got hit by a train and I lost my job as a conductor.

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17 October: Poor jokes:

We were so poor that every time I passed by a butcher shop I thought there had been a horrible accident.

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My grandfather died at atshuitz Poor fella fell of the guard tower

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