Best Jokes
| Fire jokes |
Me:Have you seen a mr.weewoo Most people:no Me: he drives the ambulance down stairs
| Stairs jokes |
Here’s a better version of a previous joke:
I would tell you a milk joke, but its whey too cheesy!
| Milk jokes |
It kept getting side-tracked.
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I had an uncle who was a conductor. He wasn’t a symphony conductor, nor was he a street car conductor, nor was he a train conductor. He was struck by lightning.
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What did Earth say to the other planets? – “You guys have no life!”
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I went to a butcher house with my little cousin and seen a baby pig and told her look its pepa pig
She started crying
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I just quit my job at a can crushing factory.
It was soda-pressing.
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A man walked into a shop and asked the shop keeper for a potato-clock. The shop keeper said, "I dont know what a potato clock is’ The man said, "me neither but im starting a new job and my boss told me work starts at 9 so id have to get a potato clock
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%%Dad: “Son, does mommy like having lady-friends over?”
Son: “Nah, mostly men.”
Dad: “Do you think you’d be comfortable telling that to a judge in court…”
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What do you get when you combine a priest and lawyer?
A Father in law
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I couldn’t quite remember how to throw a boomerang, but eventually it came back to me.
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Kids- its time for dora kids-YAY nick jr host- today Dora is going on a big adventure with Grandma Swiper- hello kids i am trying to find my way to Diego’s will you please help me Kids- where’s dora Swiper- she’s under cardiac arrest kids — htm title=' Everybody- SWIPER NO SWIPING Swiper - AH MAN!'> poor dora Everybody- SWIPER NO SWIPING Swiper — AH MAN!!
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Why are quantum physicists so poor at sex? – Because when they find the position, they can’t find the momentum, and when they have the momentum, they can’t find the position.
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The other day, I donated my car keys, $1,000, and a passport to a homeless man. You could feel the happiness come from me after he holstered his suppressed shotgun.
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What’s the difference between America and a bottle of milk? – In 200 years the milk will have developed a culture.
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My dad went to get milk from Tesco’s.
He never came back
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