Cold jokes

Two Canadians die and end up in Hell. Satan decides to pay them a visit, so he walks into their room and sees them talking and laughing. Confused, he asks them why they’re happy. They tell him, “Well, we’re so sick of the cold where we’re from, and this place is nice and toasty.” Satan, annoyed, storms away and goes to Hell’s boiler room, where he turns up the temperature. He goes back to the Canadians’ room, along the way being begged by all sorts of people to put the heating back down. He enters the room to see the Canadians having a barbecue. Furiously, he asks them what they’re doing. “Well, we can’t pass up this wonderful weather without getting out the barbecue!” Satan realizes he’s been doing the wrong thing. He goes to the boiler room and turns it down until it’s at a colder temperature than ever seen on earth. He knows he’s won now, so he goes back to the Canadians’ room, only to see them jumping up and down in excitement. He shouts at them in fury, “WHY ARE YOU STILL HAPPY?!?!?!” They look at him and shout at the same time, “Hell froze over! That means the Leafs won! ” Why do hospitals have fans? To keep the vegetables fresh and cold.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Yoo mama so stupid she tried to stop the cold war with a heater

-2 -1 0 +1 +2

I picked up a document and I started to feel cold. I looked down at the document and it read DRAFT.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

A poster for the winter relief fund reads: "No one should be allowed to go hungry or suffer from the cold." A worker says to his friend, “now were not even allowed to do that.”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Why is it always cold in the hospital? to keep the vegetables fresh. Why was it cold in Stephen hawkings house? Because he had a new window open…

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What does the cannibal eat who comes late for dinner? The cold shoulder

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Why did Adele cross the road? To say hello on the other side.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

So i was laying in bed and jt winter do my room is aleays cold cause the heater doesnt work. And i was thinking… It would be warmer if someone else was laying here with me… Then i layghed cause who would wanna be with me. Hahaha

-2 -1 0 +1 +2

What does a bar fly and a Necrophiliac have in common? They both enjoy a Cold one once in awhile.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

So my friend and I went camping at a Cold lake Campground and he jumped into it, without any warning, and so I asked him Wat-er you doing

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

what can u catch but not throw? … . . . … … … … … . . … … … … Ook. a cold!

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

My brother once froze a dollar in a block of ice i called it cold hard cash

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What is the difference between

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Ice cold coffee? Coll beans!

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

when is a cold not a cold?

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
- up - << N E X T! >> random

© àíåêäîòîâ.net, 1997 - 2026