Computer jokes

What did Stephen hawkings computer say when he died ?? … ERROR

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The oldest computer can be traced back to Adam and Eve. It was an apple but with extremely limited memory. Just 1 byte. And then everything crashed.

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I was using my computer one time and I pressed Ctrl-Alt-Delete and Stephen Hawking went into a deep sleep

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Bill Gates teaches a kindergarten class to count to ten. “1, 2, 3, 3.1, 95, 98, ME, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 10.”

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How did the computer hackers get away from the scene of the crime? I think they just hacked the chrime

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Q:Whats the difference between a computer and an abortion clinic A: Ctrl+Alt+Delete

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Q: How did the mobile phone propose to his girlfriend? A: He gave her a ring. Q: What’s the most popular video game at the bread bakery? A: Knead for Speed. Q: Why is Santa good at karate? A: He has a black belt. Q: Where do werewolves buy Christmas gifts? A: Beast Buy. Q: What did the snowflake say to the road? A: Let’s stick together. Q: Why did the turkey

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join a band? A: So he could use his drumsticks. Q: What’s a math teacher’s favorite winter sport? A: Figure skating. Q: Where do werewolves buy Christmas gifts? A: Beast Buy. Q: What did the snowflake say to the road? A: Let’s stick together. Q: Why did the turkey join a band? A: So he could use his drumsticks. Q: What’s a math teacher’s favorite winter sport? A: Figure skating. Q: What’s a firefly’s favorite dance? A: The glitterbug. Q: Why are eyeshadow, lipstick, and mascara never mad at each other? A: Because they always make-up via GIPHY Q: Where do roses sleep at night? A: In their flowerbed Q: Why was the show bad at gymnastics? A: She was a flip-flop Q: What should you wear to a tea party? A: A t-shirt Q: What’s rain’s favorite accessory? A: A rainbow Q: Where does a sink go dancing? A: The Dish-co Q: What’s a princess’s favorite time? A: Knight time. Q: Why did the Genie get mad? A: Because he was rubbed the wrong way. Q: What’s a ballerina’s favorite type of bread? A: A bun. Q: What kind of dance was the frog prince best at? A: Hip hop. Q: What do bunnies like to do at the mall? A: Shop ‘til they hop. via GIPHY Q: How did the beauty school student do on her manicure test? A: She nailed it. Q: What is corn’s favorite music? A: Pop. Q: Why can’t Monday lift Saturday? A: It’s a weak day. Q: Why was the politician out of breath? A: He was running for office. Q: What is a soccer player’s favorite chemical element? A: Goooooooooooold! Q: Why did the fastest cat in class get kicked out of school? A: He was a cheetah. Q: Which state has the greatest number of jokes? A: Pennsylvania. Q: Where is the best place to sit when a submarine is diving? A: Inside. Q: Why did the lawyer show up in court in his underwear? A: He forgot his lawsuit. Q: Why was the teenager no longer allowed online without a license? A: He crashed the computer via GIPHY Q: What’s a ball that you don’t throw, shoot, eat, spit, bounce, or catch? A: An eyeball. Q: What do turtles, eggs, and beaches all have? A: Shells. Q: What time of year do people get injured the most? A: In the fall. Q: Why did the quarterback take the hardest classes? A: Because he knew he would pass. Q: Why did the musician throw away her table? A: Because it was flat. Q: Why didn’t the farmer’s son study medicine? A: Because he wanted to go into a different field? Q: What is the math teacher’s favorite dessert? A: Pi Q: Why was the princess in the emergency r

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get off your computer jessie jex

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Why is Steven Hawkins arrested? The police used computer GPS

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The other day my Computer crashed. Luckily there were no injuries.

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There was a car accident and the cops pull up to the crime seen to start asking people questions. The police started talking to a blonde lady and said what happened here she responded by saying a car crash. They then asked but how did it happen, she responded the cars crashed into each other. They finally said but why did it happen. The lady said oh i know where your going with this. It happened because when cars push on the gas peddle the car goes forward and they both pushed it so they both went forward and hit each other. One cop said never mind ma’m and they stared walking away. The blonde lady then said oh and officers my computer froze do you think i should put in the microwave or in the oven?

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one day my ex best friend lied about his computer died when he left the call and watched youtube

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You make the juice go through my power brick.

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My mom told me to get off the computer or she will slam my head into the keyboard. I dont thing shelsjkdvklserdhcvjskrldfjlbudrjkfhbverjksfbhvyuksejfvsuil.w35xfc.