Q: What’s the difference between me and you? A: I’m not wasting my time reading this joke.
What is the difference between a sloth and a depressed kid? A sloth doesn’t need a rope to hang
What is the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is a refreshing summertime snack the other one is a watermelon.
What is the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts? Well beer nuts are 49 cents but deer nuts are just under a buck. (If you don’t understand the genders of deer you won’t understand it.)
Two homeless alcoholics want to get drunk but don’t have enough money for even the cheapest drinks in any bar. So one of them devises a clever plan : he tells his friend “We should buy a hot-dog sausage with the last of our money and stick it down my pants, then drink a load of drinks but then when the bill comes you get down and suck on the hot-dog and it’ll look like you’re sucking on my dick so then we’ll get thrown out without paying and we can just go to another bar and do the same thing again”. His friend agrees so they buy the hot-dog, stick it down the first dude’s pants, go to the bar and then the second dude begins to suck on the hot-dog as agreed. They are thrown out and hit another four bars this way. In the end, as they lie drunk on the floor in some alleyway, the second guy says, “Well, what a great night. Free beers in five different bars!” The first guy says “Yeah! Especially since the hot-dog fell out before we even reached the first bar!”
What’s the difference between a school and a isis military base? Don’t ask me I only fly the drone…
What’s the difference between England’s football team and a tea bag? The tea bag stays in the cup longer.
What’s the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead bodies I dont have a Lamborghini in my garage
what’s the difference between a pizza delivery guy and a cop. pizza guys get punished for not doing their jobs properly
how did riahna know that chris brown was cheating on her…there was a different color of lip stick on his knuckles
whats the difference between Chris Brown and Santa. Santa stops at 3 hoes
What’s the difference between drugs and kids? I don’t sell drugs.
What’s the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb? You can unscrew a light bulb.
What is the difference between American teenage girls and Muslim teenage girls? – American teenage girls get stoned before they have sex.
Roast: What is the difference between your girlfriend and a walrus? One is hairy and smells like fish and the other is a walrus. Your welcome What is the difference between a Catholic priest and Acne? – Acne comes on your face after you turn 13.
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