Q: What is the difference between a stripper and a bungee cord? A: It is cheap fast, and if the rubber breaks, your pretty much screwed.
A Blonde walks into a hospital claiming that everywhere she touches hurts. So she goes into the examination room and the doctor says “Okay I’d like you to point to wherever it hurts”. So the Blonde pokes her cheek and says “Here. Ow.” She then pokes her arm and says “Here. Ow.” She then repeats this with different parts of her body until the doctor finally says that she should stop. The doctor say “I know what’s happened to you.” “What’s happened to me??” The Blonde says, concerned. The doctor simply replies, “You have a broken finger.”
What’s the difference between a cranky two-year-old and a duckling? – One is a whiny toddler, and the other is a tiny waddler.
Q: What’s the difference between me and cancer? A: My dad didn’t beat cancer…
What’s the difference between your jokes and your penis? Nobody laughs at your jokes
What’s the difference between a baby and a salad? Most people don’t get angry when you toss a salad.
What’s the difference between a bus full of children and a fish? The fish can swim
What’s the difference between a mosquito and a blonde?the mosquito stops sucking after you slap it.
What’s the difference between a gay guy and a microwave? The microwave doesn’t brown the meat.
What’s the difference between a paycheck and your penis? You don’t have to beg your wife to blow up the paycheck…
What the difference between an Irish wedding and a Irish funeral, one less drunk.
What’s the difference between $1 Million and Baby Teeth? I don’t have $1 Million in my wallet.
What’s the difference between a teacher and a train? The teacher says, “Spit out your gum,” but a train says, “Chew chew!”
whats the difference between the twin towers and an ugly girl. the twin towers at least got f@cked.
What’s the difference between you and Jesus? Your parents remember Jesus’s birth date
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