Two homeless alcoholics want to get drunk but don’t have enough money for even the cheapest drinks in any bar. So one of them devises a clever plan : he tells his friend “We should buy a hot-dog sausage with the last of our money and stick it down my pants, then drink a load of drinks but then when the bill comes you get down and suck on the hot-dog and it’ll look like you’re sucking on my dick so then we’ll get thrown out without paying and we can just go to another bar and do the same thing again”. His friend agrees so they buy the hot-dog, stick it down the first dude’s pants, go to the bar and then the second dude begins to suck on the hot-dog as agreed. They are thrown out and hit another four bars this way. In the end, as they lie drunk on the floor in some alleyway, the second guy says, “Well, what a great night. Free beers in five different bars!” The first guy says “Yeah! Especially since the hot-dog fell out before we even reached the first bar!”
the difference between dark jokes and morbid is dark jokes are 10 babies in 1 trash can and morbid jokes are 1 baby in 10 trash cans
What’s the difference betwen a alligator and a crocrodile? One of them you’ll see in a while and the other one you’ll se later
What’s the difference between that bridge and my will to live? None, they’re both too short.
What is the difference between me and a knife? The knife has a point.
Do you know the difference between toilet paper and a shower curtan… So your the one !
Three Nuns died in a car crash, they went up to heaven at the pearly gates the gate keeper said this really should not have happened so I am going to send you back to earth as different people so tell me who you want to be or look like the first nun said I want to look like Madonna puff,you look like her now and but you can’t use her name And sent her down to earth. The second one said I want to look like Marilyn Monroe he then makes her look like her and sends her down to earth. The third nun I said I want to look like Sarah Pipalini. The gate keeper says to her, Sarah Pipalini who is that? she gives the gate keeper a newspaper article he reads it shakes his head no and says it’s not Sarah Pipalini it Sahara pipeline laid by 500 men.
I was digging in our garden when I found a chest full of gold coins. I was about to run straight home to tell my wife about it, but then I remembered why I was digging in our garden.
whats the difference between McDonald’s and a priest nothing… they both stick their meat in ten year old buns
What’s the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb? You can unscrew a light bulb.
What’s the difference between you and Hitler? Hitler knew when to kill himself.
Q: What’s the difference between me and cancer? A: My dad didn’t beat cancer…
Guy 1:"Tell me a bad pun" Guy 2: "Alright What’s the difference between a tuna fish, a piano and a tube of glue" Guy 1: "Ok that last one was random as heck what is the difference" Guy 2: " you can tuna a piano, but you can’t piano a tuna" Guy 1: "Ok where does the glue come in" Guy 2: “Ah i knew you’d get stuck on that” you might be
What’s the difference between cake and pie ?r2, cake are round
What is the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I take off my boots when I jump on a trampoline.
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