What’s the difference?

What’s the difference between a amateur thief and a professional thief? The amateur thief says, "Give me all your money!" The professional thief says, “Sign here please.”

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What’s the difference between a bus full of children and a fish? The fish can swim

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what’s the difference between eggs,and you?eggs get laid,you don’t.

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What’s the difference between a well-dressed man on a bicycle and a badly dressed man on a unicycle? Attire.

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What is the difference between a sloth and a depressed kid? A sloth doesn’t need a rope to hang

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What’s the difference between your jokes and your penis? Nobody laughs at your jokes

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What’s the difference between a priest and a rabbi, the rabbi cuts it off the the priest sucks it off

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My girlfriend asked me to write her a poem for Valentines Day: Roses are red, Watches are gold. Get on your knees, And do as you’re told. What’s the difference between your girlfriend and sister ? Nothing if your from Alabama

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What is the difference in having a granny fetish and necrophilia? A few weeks.

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what’s the difference between a feminist and suicide vest a least one does something when it is triggered

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Three Nuns died in a car crash, they went up to heaven at the pearly gates the gate keeper said this really should not have happened so I am going to send you back to earth as different people so tell me who you want to be or look like the first nun said I want to look like Madonna puff,you look like her now and but you can’t use her name And sent her down to earth. The second one said I want to look like Marilyn Monroe he then makes her look like her and sends her down to earth. The third nun I said I want to look like Sarah Pipalini. The gate keeper says to her, Sarah Pipalini who is that? she gives the gate keeper a newspaper article he reads it shakes his head no and says it’s not Sarah Pipalini it Sahara pipeline laid by 500 men.

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What’s the difference between flat earthers and my grandfather? flat earthers are more disconnected from reality than my grandfather is disconnected from his life support.

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Whats the difference between a hippie chick and a hockey player? – The hockey player showers after 3 periods.

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What is the difference between a Priest and a Doctor The Doctor doesn’t like to give physicals.

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What’s the difference between princess Dianna and Thomas the tank engine Thomas came out the other end of the tunnel

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