What’s the difference?

What’s the difference between a tire and 365 used condoms? One’s a Goodyear. The other’s a great year.

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What’s the difference between a Catholic Priest and a pedophile? One is Catholic

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I was digging in our garden when I found a chest full of gold coins. I was about to run straight home to tell my wife about it, but then I remembered why I was digging in our garden.

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what’s the difference between eggs,and you?eggs get laid,you don’t.

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My girlfriend asked me to write her a poem for Valentines Day: Roses are red, Watches are gold. Get on your knees, And do as you’re told. What’s the difference between your girlfriend and sister ? Nothing if your from Alabama

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What’s the difference between a cranky two-year-old and a duckling? – One is a whiny toddler, and the other is a tiny waddler.

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whats the difference between the twin towers and an ugly girl. the twin towers at least got f@cked.

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Whats the difference between a feminist and a pencil? One of them has a POINT:)

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What’s the difference between a mosquito and a blonde?the mosquito stops sucking after you slap it.

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What’s the difference between a prostitute and a daredevil? One has cunning stunts, whilst the other has a stunning…

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What’s the difference between sand and a dildo? Sand has never gone up my ass

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3 construction workers where sitting on the bridge that they where building having their lunch break. The first guy says “If I get a vegimite sandwich again I am going to jump off this bridge.” The second guys says “If get a peanut butter sandwich again I am going to jump off this bridge”. The third guy says if I get another strawberry jam sandwich then I am going to jump off this bridge.” The next day the first guy gets a vegimite sandwich, the second guy gets a peanut butter sandwich and the third guy gets a strawberry jam sandwich. All 3 guys jump of the bridge and die. The next day at their funerals the first wife says “If he just told me I would have given him a different sandwich.” The second guys wife says “It is all my fault. If only I knew.” The third wife says “I don’t get it, he makes his own lunch.”

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What is the difference in having a granny fetish and necrophilia? A few weeks.

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whats the difference between a cat and a bannana, its hard to peel a cat

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why doesn’t barbie ever get pregnant ? Because Ken comes in a different box !!!

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