what’s the difference between a grape, apple and an arm? you don’t slice a grape
what’s the difference between a feminist and suicide vest a least one does something when it is triggered
Whats the difference between a prostitute and a drug dealer? The prostitute can wash her crack and sell it again.
What’s the difference between England’s football team and a tea bag? The tea bag stays in the cup longer.
There was the person who sent ten different puns to his friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did.
whats the difference between my thighs and my eyebrows? nothing i slit both of them
3 construction workers where sitting on the bridge that they where building having their lunch break. The first guy says “If I get a vegimite sandwich again I am going to jump off this bridge.” The second guys says “If get a peanut butter sandwich again I am going to jump off this bridge”. The third guy says if I get another strawberry jam sandwich then I am going to jump off this bridge.” The next day the first guy gets a vegimite sandwich, the second guy gets a peanut butter sandwich and the third guy gets a strawberry jam sandwich. All 3 guys jump of the bridge and die. The next day at their funerals the first wife says “If he just told me I would have given him a different sandwich.” The second guys wife says “It is all my fault. If only I knew.” The third wife says “I don’t get it, he makes his own lunch.”
Whats the difference batween an onion and a baby. One makes you cry when you cut it up
What is the difference in having a granny fetish and necrophilia? A few weeks.
What’s the difference between England and a tea bag? – The tea bag stays longer in a cup.
What’s the difference between fruit and dead babies? I don’t put fruit in a blender. Whats the difference between Stephen Hawking an a walkie talkie? Stephen cant walkie an stephen cant talkie
What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo? – One is really heavy, and the other is a little lighter.
What’s the difference between a paycheck and your penis? You don’t have to beg your wife to blow up the paycheck…
What’s the difference between Madeline McCann and Batman? Batman returns
A Blonde walks into a hospital claiming that everywhere she touches hurts. So she goes into the examination room and the doctor says “Okay I’d like you to point to wherever it hurts”. So the Blonde pokes her cheek and says “Here. Ow.” She then pokes her arm and says “Here. Ow.” She then repeats this with different parts of her body until the doctor finally says that she should stop. The doctor say “I know what’s happened to you.” “What’s happened to me??” The Blonde says, concerned. The doctor simply replies, “You have a broken finger.”
RUS | ENG
