What’s the difference between meat and fish? If you beat your fish, it’ll die.
What’s the difference between a baby and a salad? Most people don’t get angry when you toss a salad.
What’s the difference between a potted plant and your wife? The first is easier to bury.
What’s the difference between a politician and a flying pig? – The letter F.
There was the person who sent ten different puns to his friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did.
Father and mother are making love in the bedroom. Mother is on top of father. Suddenly the son enters the bedroom. Everyone is embarrassed, of course. The next morning, the mother takes the little boy aside and says, “I’ll tell you about what you saw yesterday, you know Dad has a big belly and that’s why mom sometimes sits on top of that belly to push it flat.” . Says that little boy: “But mama, that does not make any difference.” “Oh no?” the mom asks. “No,” says the little boy, “When you go to work, the neighbor comes, and she puts herself on her knees for Dad, and sheblows his belly up again!”
whats the difference between a blonde and a car door: the harder you slam the blonde the looser it gets
What’s the difference between humans and bullets? Humans miss John Lennon
What’s the difference between flat earthers and my grandfather? flat earthers are more disconnected from reality than my grandfather is disconnected from his life support.
Him: What’s The Difference Between Incestry.com and Ancestry.com? Her: What? Him: Nothing, Either way you will be dating your Cousin
I was digging in our garden when I found a chest full of gold coins. I was about to run straight home to tell my wife about it, but then I remembered why I was digging in our garden.
Whats the difference between a school bus and my Dad’s van? Schools buses usually don’t have screaming and crying children
What’s the difference between parents and depression? at least one of them leave you
What’s the difference between a blonde and a masqueto? A masqueto stops sucking when you slap it
What’s the difference between a cranky two-year-old and a duckling? – One is a whiny toddler, and the other is a tiny waddler.
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