Dream jokes

Why did the silly girl ?? put sugar under her pillow? She wanted to have sweet dreams. ??

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

I was working for Space X. I was instructed to control a satellite’s orbit rotation when suddenly the screen went black. I investigated and found out one of Penaldos penalty had hit and destroyed the satellite. Shame on you Penaldo for ruining my dream job!

-2 -1 0 +1 +2


-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Stressed Out-By- Twenty One Pilots and watersharky Music Productions-I wish I found some better sounds No one’s ever heard I wish I had a better voice That sang some better words I wish I found some chords In an order that is new I wish I didn’t have to rhyme Every time I sang I was told when I get older All my fears would shrink But now I’m

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

%%Never gonna give, never gonna give (Give you up) We’ve known each other for so long Your heart’s been aching, but You’re too shy to say it Inside, we both know what’s been going on We know the game and we’re gonna play it I just wanna tell you how I’m feeling Gotta make you understand Never gonna give you up Never gonna let you down Never gonna run around and desert you Never gonna make you cry Never gonna say goodbye Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you. mucho_mango: just woke up from my dream what was that.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Man: I know how to please a woman. Woman: Then please leave me alone. Man: I want to give myself to you. Woman: Sorry, I don’t accept cheap gifts. Man: Your hair color is fabulous. Woman: Thank you. It’s on aisle three at the corner drug store. Man: You look like a dream. Woman: Go back to sleep. Man: I can tell that you want me. Woman: Yes, I want you to leave. Man: Hey, baby, what’s your sign? Woman: Do not enter. -OR- Stop. Man: Your body is like a temple. Woman: Sorry, there are no services today. Man: Is this seat empty? Woman: Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down. Man: What’s it like being the most beautiful girl in the bar? Woman: I hate you. Man: Haven’t I seen you someplace before? Woman: Yeah, that’s why I don’t go there anymore.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

You don’t have a forehead you have a five head. You don’t have dreams you have movies.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2


Man: I know how to please a woman. Woman: Then please leave me alone, you ugly two-faced hypocrite. Man: I want to give myself to you. Woman: Sorry, I don’t like ugly peasants. Man: Your hair colour is fabulous. Woman: I hate your hair colour, though. Man: You look like a dream. Woman: Then open your ugly eyes and stop sleeping, hypocrite! Man: I can tell that you want me. Woman: Yes, I want you dead. R.I.P Man: Hey, baby, what’s your sign? Woman: F*** you, pedophile! Man: Your body is like a temple. Woman: Sorry, there are no services for pedophiles. Man: Is this seat empty? Woman: Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down, you little peasant. Man: What’s it like being the most beautiful girl in the bar? Every other woman I see looks ugly. Bleuch! Woman: How dare you! Man: Haven’t I seen you someplace before? Woman: Yeah, that’s why I don’t go there anymore. I saw you playing with boxes in the store room and saying “I AM KING OF THE WORLD!”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Me: I have a dream Mom: what? Me: for you to f@cking shut up

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Why didn’t the skeleton follow his dreams? He was too gutless. I wonder if the 2 Irish kids off the Titanic movie who went to sleep before it sank had wet dreams?

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *


© àíåêäîòîâ.net, 1997 - 2025