There was once a man from Peru Who fell asleep in a canoe While dreaming of Venus He played with his penis And awoke with a hand full of goo
So i was sitting with my little brother and talk about our dreams. “What do you wanna be when you grow up?” I asked him. He answered “A doctor!”. I wanted to tease him so i said “I wouldn’t be treated by a doctor like you”. I was hoping he would get mad or something but instead, he calmly replied “Brother, i said doctor. Not a vet”
Everyone in my class: I can’t wait until have a family, I can’t wait to study for my dream job My friends: What’s your dream job? Me: I’m going to die young :))
I told a diabetic boy to have sweet dreams, and he died the next morning
Minecraft YouTube but I can sing Believer! YouTube but I making a first video in YouTube. And I record all the Minecraft Videos and a upload. Ooohh! To try it and a upload. Ooohh! I’ve been recorded to streaming, couple more sleeps to do the dreaming. I finally get to the stronghold, and if you told me you told me you told me you told me. Place some more ender eyes, and it’s time to big surprise.
Dream tweeted, and I quote “Babies kick pregnant women all the time but I do it one time and I’m the one arrested.”
are you an abstract manifestation of my childhood traumas and recent memories combined? cuz damn, you look like you came out of a dream.
Why do black men have nightmares? because the only one that had a dream got shot.
A man was having a dream. He dreamt about a mystical creature that was commonly known as the god of toast. When the man woke up, he turned to tell his wife about the dream. When he delivers the toast god punch line, his wife shrugged as she faced the opposite direction to the man. The man turned around also and started sobbing as he realised his marriage is in shambles
I was working for Space X. I was instructed to control a satellite’s orbit rotation when suddenly the screen went black. I investigated and found out one of Penaldos penalty had hit and destroyed the satellite. Shame on you Penaldo for ruining my dream job!
have you ever heard of a dream that that that that the universe was a fake machine?
You’re so short, you must need a ladder to reach your advice/dreams.
Yo mama so ugly that even Donald Trump couldn’t be inside her dreams.
I know this is a really bad poem but I’ll do it anyway cuz I have nothing else to do. Twas so pretty a night, with people all asleep. Everyone’s dreaming of that candy apple treat, and a palace. But alas! No it’s all a dream. Even eating ice cream, it’s all a dream! Why can’t I have this? Why can’t I have that? BUT NO! It’s just hitting you like a bat. YOU JUST HAVE TO HAVE IT, you say to yourself. All for me, all for me, and exedra. it goes on and on. But why wish for riches? Your already rich enough? If you have a device, then take my advise, if you were poor you would have spent the money on food, like honey, not something that… OF ALL THINGS IS GOOGLE! Like I said, it’s really bad. :( I dreamed about drowning in an ocean made out of orange soda last night. It took me a while to work out it was just a Fanta sea.
My hopes and dreams
RUS | ENG