Dream jokes

Sniff a liter of petrol You’ll go back to the dream time at

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I had a dream that i was destroyin the world and i blew up my house for fun I woke up and couldnt find my pillow… Nor the house

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Can people please shut up about ‘male privileges’. There is no right that men have that women don’t. Women have the right to genital integrity. Women can vote without having to sign up for the draft. Women have the right to choose parenthood, men do not. Women have the right to be assumed caregivers for children. Women have the right to call unwanted, coerced sex rape. Women have the right to lower jail sentences for the same crime. Women have the right to not be assumed sexual predators. Women have the right to government departments that solely serve their interests. They also have the luxury of “women only” events that men cannot even dream of. (They even took the boy scouts away from us) Women have the right to government-enforced gender quotas Women have the right to exclusive tax benefits for being a business owner. Women have the right to domestic violence shelters Women have the right to not be assumed the primary aggressor in a domestic depute Women have the right to rape a man or boy and if she gets pregnant from that man/boy they can sue him for child support. So it is women who have more rights. So shut up feminists please.

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Your forehead is so big that you dream in 4K.

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Last night i had a dream about fishing poles, turns out it wasn’t REEL

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I slept like a log last night…woke up in the fireplace

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Everyone in my class: I can’t wait until have a family, I can’t wait to study for my dream job My friends: What’s your dream job? Me: I’m going to die young :))

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When Caesar’s wife told him she dreamed he should beware the Ides of March, he scoffed and said, “What? It’s not like I’m gonna be stabbed 23 times by my best buddies!”

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so one time I had a dream where I as on a road trip and we drove a gulf cart and a Susan, which I don’t know why the heck the name of the car was called a Susan. We went into this house and there was like a woman there and we went into this bathroom which looked like a public bathroom which was so weird!!!

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People having seizures are just people dreaming about rollercoasters.

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There once was a man from Peru.who dreamed he was eating his shoe. He woke up at night ,with a terrible fright,to find out his dream had come true.

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so i was asleep and woke up and went to work my wife left already to her job i was driving my car and ran over someone i woke up in my bed realized it was htm title=' the my wife got hit bye a car'>all a dream 20 minutes later i got a phone call the my wife got hit bye a car

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I’m a little piss baby! -dream

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What is a orphans dream To get on top of the wanted list ??

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A man was having a dream. He dreamt about a mystical creature that was commonly known as the god of toast. When the man woke up, he turned to tell his wife about the dream. When he delivers the toast god punch line, his wife shrugged as she faced the opposite direction to the man. The man turned around also and started sobbing as he realised his marriage is in shambles

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