You’re so short, you must need a ladder to reach your advice/dreams.
What’s a dog’s dream car? A Dachshund 240Z.
Me in my dream: what a good day rumble ooh! What was dat I wake up and I find myself on the floor
Jump in the cadillac girl lets put some miles on it
You don’t have a forehead you have a five head. You don’t have dreams you have movies.
I told a diabetic boy to have sweet dreams, and he died the next morning
What kind of dreams do hotels have? Suite dreams
I slept like a log last night…woke up in the fireplace
I had a dream I was a muffler last night… I woke up EXHAUSTED ????
So a guy is taking a piss in a public bathroom. He looks over and sees a short guy with a very large green dick, who looks up at him and says “is there a problem boyoh?”. “I’m sorry, it’s just that thing is huge, and why the hell is it green?!”. The man reply’s “I’m a leprechaun”. “Really?” says the man. “That’s right. And I’ll grant you three wishes if you let me stick it in your pooper”. “Anything I want?! 3 of them?” reply’s the man. “Anything in your wildest dreams boyoh, but you have to let me finish”. The man bends over, and the leprechaun puts in in, thrusting back and forth he asks for the man’s first wish. “I want a giant yacht” “Aye”, says the leprechaun. “It’s pulling into your own private harbor now”. “For my second wish I want a billion dollars” the man says, beginning to sweat. “Aye, it’s stacked inside the yacht waiting for you” the leprechaun reply’s. “Okay”, the man groans in pain. “For my final wish I want this yacht to be full of beautiful women”. “You betcha boyoh” says the leprechaun. “The girls are there waiting for you nooWWW” as he lets out a moan of pleasure. The man exhausted and sore says “that was rough, but worth it for those wishes. Where do I go?” The little man with the giant green dick, pulling up his pants, his accent now gone says: “aren’t you a little old to be believing in leprechauns?”.
He replied with ”when were you born?”
Why did the silly girl ?? put sugar under her pillow? She wanted to have sweet dreams. ??
Last night I had the strangest dream ! I sailed away to China! And I caught the coronavirus! You said you needed to wash your hands! Didn’t want no one else to touch you! What does that mean ?! And you said!! Ain’t nothing gonna break my lungs ? ?! Ain’t no way of slowing Covid down! Oh no I’ve got to keep on coughing!!!
Your forehead is so big I bet your dreams are in IMAX.
I lent my sister my bed. The next morning, she told me it worked like a dream.
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