Dream jokes

my best friend said can you put your dick in me i said can i cum in u?

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I told a diabetic boy to have sweet dreams, and he died the next morning

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I lent my sister my bed. The next morning, she told me it worked like a dream.

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Minecraft YouTube but I can sing Believer! YouTube but I making a first video in YouTube. And I record all the Minecraft Videos and a upload. Ooohh! To try it and a upload. Ooohh! I’ve been recorded to streaming, couple more sleeps to do the dreaming. I finally get to the stronghold, and if you told me you told me you told me you told me. Place some more ender eyes, and it’s time to big surprise.

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He replied with ”when were you born?”

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I had a dream about a car, and I woke up exhausted

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What kind of dreams do hotels have? Suite dreams

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Last night i had a dream about fishing poles, turns out it wasn’t REEL

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Jump in the cadillac girl lets put some miles on it

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I slept like a log last night…woke up in the fireplace

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Dream tweeted, and I quote “Babies kick pregnant women all the time but I do it one time and I’m the one arrested.”

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Man: I know how to please a woman. Woman: Then please leave me alone. Man: I want to give myself to you. Woman: Sorry, I don’t accept cheap gifts. Man: Your hair color is fabulous. Woman: Thank you. It’s on aisle three at the corner drug store. Man: You look like a dream. Woman: Go back to sleep. Man: I can tell that you want me. Woman: Yes, I want you to leave. Man: Hey, baby, what’s your sign? Woman: Do not enter. -OR- Stop. Man: Your body is like a temple. Woman: Sorry, there are no services today. Man: Is this seat empty? Woman: Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down. Man: What’s it like being the most beautiful girl in the bar? Woman: I hate you. Man: Haven’t I seen you someplace before? Woman: Yeah, that’s why I don’t go there anymore.

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The pope drives around in a glass box or as I like to call him a snipers dream

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When Caesar’s wife told him she dreamed he should beware the Ides of March, he scoffed and said, “What? It’s not like I’m gonna be stabbed 23 times by my best buddies!”

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So i was sitting with my little brother and talk about our dreams. “What do you wanna be when you grow up?” I asked him. He answered “A doctor!”. I wanted to tease him so i said “I wouldn’t be treated by a doctor like you”. I was hoping he would get mad or something but instead, he calmly replied “Brother, i said doctor. Not a vet”

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