Drunk jokes

Derrick and Clive. They have a song about a Dad with Cancer and other extremely offensive subjects in a routine called “The non stop dancer”. It is very funny but it is made even funnier by Dudley moors, drunken and stoned laughter through the song. One of the best routines ever. Look it up on YouTube. They recorded them in the studio but they are adlibbing and extremely drunk.

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one day jack and jill went up a hill jack got jill drunk and horny then took her to a hotel becus jack wanted to suck and lick her candy stick

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You know what they say about dark humor: it hits harder than a drunk parent

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A drunk guy runs into a bar… he bangs his head and falls down, why? Because he is in a prison cell.

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My mom said i need Jesus in my life, So I drunk up the holy water ;}.

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So I had an idea: you and a friend go bar (pub (whatever you call it)) hopping and propose to said friend in each htm title=' you get drunk and have a great time'>one so everyone buys you free drinks and you get drunk and have a great time

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Three friends are in a hotel room in Soviet Russia. The first two men open a bottle of vodka, while the third is tired and goes straight to bed. He is unable to sleep however, as his increasingly drunk friends tell political jokes loudly. After a while, the tired man gets frustrated and walks downstairs for a smoke. He stops in the lounge and asks the receptionist to bring tea to their room in five minutes. The man walks back into the room, joins the table, leans towards a power outlet and speaks into it: “Comrade major, we want some tea to room 62 please.” His friends laugh on the joke, until there is a knock on the door. The receptionist brings a teapot. His friends fall silent and pale, horrified of what they just witnessed. The party is dead, and the man goes to sleep. After a good night’s rest, the man wakes up, and notices his friends are gone. Surprised, he walks downstairs and asks the receptionist where they went. The nervous receptionist whispers that KGB came and took them before dawn. The man is horrified. He wonders why he was spared. The receptionist responds: “Well, comrade major did quite like your tea joke.”

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A drunk walks into and says, “All lawyers are a$$holes!” A guy at the other end of the bar says, “I resent that!” The drunk says, “Why, are you a lawyer?” and the other guy says, “No, I’m an a$$hole!”

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little johnny dad was drunk and told him to grow up and he sad stfu you need to be young you big ass bitch

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How come yo mama did not come straight home from work last night? Because her daughter had sex with her boyfriend and got drunk.

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What did the drunk women said to the man after leaving the bar? Alcohol-you later

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What did Stephen Hawking’s wife say to him when he came home drunk? Nothing… she couldn’t tell.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, they turned to drunks and have no will, Jill said to Jack your love reveal, then think of building me a still.

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What the difference between an Irish wedding and a Irish funeral, one less drunk.

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Watersharky Music Productions Presents Memories by Conan Gray One, two It’s been a couple months That’s just about enough time For me to stop crying when I look at all the pictures Now I kinda smile, I haven’t felt that in a while It’s late, I hear the door Bell ringing and it’s pouring I open up that door, see your brown eyes at the

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