Teacher: People with Depression never get anywhere in life. Student 1: My mom has depression, but she died. Student 2: My sister has depression and she’s going to Therapy. Student 3: My Dad Has depression, and he’s Doing REALLY Well
When does a joke become a dad joke? When it Leaves and never comes back
Why can’t orphans go to daughter and dad dance night they don’t have a dad to go with.
My dad is like my virginity. I lost him at 12
How do you circumcise someone from Alabama? Kick his sisters jaw
What did one cell say to his sister when she stepped on his toe? Mitosis!
My Daughter is Super Smart! She pours her own drinks on the floor
roses are red violets are violets my dad died in 9/11 and he was a good piolet
I told my dad is was self harming. The next day we talked about it and he said “Hey you should CUT it out.” It was funny but I couldn’t bring myself to laugh at that.
Son : "Dad, Are we pyromaniacs ?" Dad : "Yes, we arson
Guys my sisters pregnant! Im finally a dad!
I was watching my daughter at a park she was playing with a few people another parent came up to me and said which was is yours, just for fun i said “i am still choosing” she looked horrified
I love you Hebrew john
So a daughter asks her father “dad what is you opinion on abortions?” So her father says why don’t you ask your sister. The daughter responds “but I don’t have a sister… Oh”
A heavily pregnant woman is in an accident and gives birth to twins while comatose. Upon awakening some days later, the doctors tell her that her brother Tom filled out the birth certificates while she was out. “Oh no, Tom’s an idiot, what did he name my daughter?” she asked the nurse. “Denise.” “That’s not a bad name. And what did he name the boy?” “Tom Junior.”
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