My dad is like Hurricane Katrina. I haven’t seen either sense 2005
I named my daughter Kennedy so when I talked about how her brain was shot out of her head people just thought I paid really close attention in history.
When you ask your sister if she wanna smash, but then she grabs the switch.
A girl noticed hair growing between her legs and asked her mom about it. Her mom said it was her monkey and it grows hair.so she told her sister and her sister said that aint nothing mines already eating bananas
Knock knock who there interrupting cow interrupting cow moo ??????????????????
Little Johnny catches his parents going at it and says “hey dad! Whatcha doin?” His father says “I’m filling your moms tank” Johnny says, “oh yeah well, you better get a model that gets better mileage because th milk man filled her up this morning.”
How do you circumcise a hill billy… Kick his sister in the jaw
Why does sally have a 100 sisters? She lives in a orphanage
There once was a brother and a sister so one night it’s storming really bad and the sister goes into the brothers room and asks " can I stay with you tonight because I’m scared" the brother replies with " yea sure but just don’t tell Mom" so the girl climbs into the bed and looks under the sheets to see the boys penis and asks “what’s that?” And the boy replies with “that’s my pet snake” and the girl asks “can I pet it?” And the boy says “sure just don’t tell Mom” and the boy falls asleep and wakes up in a hospital and asks “what happened” and the girl said “I pet the snake but it spit on me so I bit it’s head off” My conversion therapy done worked. Now I only sleep with my sister and not my brother.
What makes a joke a dad joke? I don’t know. I don’t even have one as an example.
Yo sis come here sis: what. Me: oh sorry you doing school sis: yup me can i go sis:no way you’re going to hug me me: i love you
One day I came home from school and said to my dad ‘I got expelled from school today’ he said ’ how’ I said I threw my book at the teacher’ he asked why’ I told him we were doing an anti-bullying program htm title=' so I threw my dictionary at her. ’'>and my teacher said words can’t hurt me so I threw my dictionary at her. ’
She was only a potato chip manufacturer "s daughter - by she was Frito Lay!
A virgin is what I called my daughter before I took that away from her
So there I was f@cking my sister and she’s shouts “god you f@ck like dad” I then said “damn that’s what mom said”
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