My dad is like my virginity. I lost him at 12
What does a dad and the Twin Towers have in common? Once they’re gone they never come back.
A virgin is what I called my daughter before I took that away from her
One day a father and a daughter were at a park. The daughter accidentally kills a butterfly. The father says, “Just because you killed the butterfly, you don’t get butter for a week.” They were there the next day, and the daughter kills a cockroach. The father laughs and says, “Nice try.”
My daughter said i could never make a car out of spaghetti, you should have seen the look on her face when I drove pasta!!!
dark humor is like a dad not everyone gets it
So there I was f@cking my sister and she’s shouts “god you f@ck like dad” I then said “damn that’s what mom said”
Q:Why did the father through butter out the window?A:he wanted to see a butterfly
The last words my Dad spoke before he passed was, “Honey put down the knife we were only talking about getting a divorce.”
Teacher: You cant be here after school without a parent! Orphan: -no response-
The doctor told me I had aids I said it’s your fault sister.
My Aunt visited and saw all of the stuff around the house my mom had kept over the years and said “If you have something that no one likes, and it only makes people upset, or its useless, throw it away.” the next time my Aunt visited she said “Where is you daughter? ” my Mom said “I took your advice”
Daughter: So, I got my period. Mom: That’s wonderful, dear! Now you can bleed for a whole week a month without dying! Daughter: That’s nice, Mum, but isn’t the whole point of getting your period dying? Mom: Yes, but you have to kill yourself a little longer to live through to the another day. Daughter: Thanks, Mum. That makes a whole lot of sense. (Sarcastically) Mom: You’re welcome, honey. (Clueless. Obviously.)
Mr smith had four daughters. Each of his daughters had a brother. How many children does Mr smith have Tell me answers in comment box
Screw sister from a mister or brother from another mother. We besties from another testie.
RUS | ENG
