Family jokes

One night a girl said to her family "Goodnight Mommy, Goodnight Daddy, Goodnight Grandma, Goodbye Grandpa. the next morning her grandpa died. That night she said "Goodnight mommy, Goodnight daddy, Goodbye Grandma. the next morning the grandma died. The dad started to fear for his life because he was next. That night the girl said "Goodnight mommy, Goodbye daddy. the next morning the dad woke up and he was perfectly fine but when he went into the kitchen he saw his wife crying. when he asked her whats wrong she said “The Mail Man died”.

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What’s the best part about plowing your cousin? -It makes your sister jealous

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Best friend: dude your sister is hot i’d Hit that Me: already did SWEEETT HOMMEE ALABAMA

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What did one cell say to his sister when she stepped on his toe? Mitosis!

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Teacher: You cant be here after school without a parent! Orphan: -no response-

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To All The Naruto Fans: sharingan is red rasengan are blue if you dare touch my daughter ill chidori you

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How do you know your sister is on her period? Your dad’s c–k tastes like s–t!

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Pp almighty stabeth thy! Then my sister said just put it in.

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The Coach of the Detroit Lions had put together the perfect football team. But then his quarterback got blindsided and was out for the season with a knee injury. Then his backup went down with a concussion. He tried the trading route, free agents, but nobody any good was available. One evening while watching the news from Iraq, he saw a young Iraqi soldier

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A girl noticed hair growing between her legs and asked her mom about it. Her mom said it was her monkey and it grows hair.so she told her sister and her sister said that aint nothing mines already eating bananas

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I named my daughter Kennedy so when I talked about how her brain was shot out of her head people just thought I paid really close attention in history.

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So Kenny finally found his one true love. But he can’t be with her because it’s illegal to marry your sister.

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What does a dad and the Twin Towers have in common? Once they’re gone they never come back.

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You wanna know what i want for Christmas? My dad to come back with the milk he said he was gonna get.

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Q: what’s worst fingerbanging your sister? A: finding your dads wedding ring

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