You want to hear a dirty joke? This guy and this girl were having sex when the guys boss called to ask why he wasn’t at work. The guy responds, "I’m sick" His boss replies, "you don’t sound sick" The guy says, “I’m f@cking my sister” and hangs up the phone
So a girl goes to Santa in the mall, and Santa asks what she would like for Christmas. So the kid says: “a little sister”. So then Santa says: “bring me your mother!”
Kid: hey dad whats dark humor ? Dad: go walk up to that homeless guy and throw a rock at him . Kid: but dad I dont have any legs or arms . Dad: exactly son.
A millionaire LOVES alligators and filled his pool full of alligators, One night he has a party and says,“whoever can swim from one end to the other of the alligator infested pool unharmed will get a prize, my daughter or a million dollars.” some people line up but they are hesitant. One man gets in the water, swims from one end to the other unharmed, and went to the millionaire. The millionaire says,“wow I can’t believe you did it! So whats your prize?” the guy says,“I don’t care about the million dollars or your daughter, I just want to know who the B@$*ard was that pushed me in the pool!”
So I was in the car with my mom one time and we always joke about me being adopted (I am not) and Michael Jackson’s song Billie Jean sounds like my name and so my mom says, as the song is playing, (my name) is not my daughter, she’s just a girl who claims that I am her mum. Wow. applauds for mother Love you momma =)
Most states: “It’s ok, it won’t be awkward. We’re still friends.” Alabama: “She didn’t wanna be my girlfriend anymore. But she said she’ll still be my sister.”
How did the Hillbilly mother find out her daughter entered puberty? Her sons dick tasted funny.
You wanna know what i want for Christmas? My dad to come back with the milk he said he was gonna get.
This is a poem my younger sister when she was three, recited to a crowd and I will never forget it. It is very short though. Good night, sleep tight, wake up bright in the morning light, to do what’s right, with all your might.
I saw my sister masturbating with a carrot. I said “Come on I was gonna eat that later! Now it’s just gonna taste like carrots!”
my mom said to take out the trash bags so i did and the next day my mom asked “where are your sisters?” i said “in line to get crushed”
Gun control in America is perfect the way it is, because the other day my daughter was seeing a boy and i caught them in bed. Then i pulled out my shotgun and nearly shot him. As he was running away I shouted " The only person allowed to f*ck my daughter is me!".
What did the drummer call his 2 twin daughters? Anna 1 Anna 2
My friends daughter is taking a job in California parking cars. She says she wants to be a valet girl. For sure. For sure.
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