Family jokes

5 4 3 2 1. A castle ways a ton. 5 4 3 2 1. The Queen of England’s won. I never thought she’d get it done, but her sister is a nun.

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Dinosaurs are like my dad. I never got the see either of them and they are now extinct

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Q:Why does Santa Claus have such a big sack? A:He only comes once a year.

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My teacher said he is gonna call my dad, i cant wait to meet him ??????

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what do you call a dad in the mirror? ( Your imagination )

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You wanna know what i want for Christmas? My dad to come back with the milk he said he was gonna get.

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what’s the difference between Nemo and my dad? Nemo was eventually found.

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Corn and corn WHERE IS POPCORN!?!?!

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My dad is like Hurricane Katrina. I haven’t seen either sense 2005

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Why can’t orphans go to daughter and dad dance night they don’t have a dad to go with.

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Chinese Names - Annie Wan (Anyone) Caller: Hello, can I speak to Annie Wan (anyone)? Operator : Yes, you can speak to me. Caller: No, I want to speak to Annie Wan (anyone)! Operator: You are talking to someone! Who is this? Caller: I’m Sam Wan (Someone). And I need to talk to Annie Wan (anyone)! It’s urgent. Operator: I know you are someone and you want to talk to anyone! But what’s this urgent matter about? Caller: Well… just tell my sister Annie Wan (anyone) that our brother Noel Wan (no one)?as involved in an accident. Noel Wan (no one) got injured and now Noel Wan (no one) is being sent to the hospital. Operator: Look if no one was injured and no one was sent to the hospital, then the accident isn’t an urgent matter! You may find this hilarious but I don’t have time for this! Caller: You are so rude! Who are you? Operator: I’m Saw Lee (Sorry). Caller: Yes! You should be sorry. Now give me your name!!

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I saw my sister masturbating with a carrot. I said “Come on I was gonna eat that later! Now it’s just gonna taste like carrots!”

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my mom said to take out the trash bags so i did and the next day my mom asked “where are your sisters?” i said “in line to get crushed”

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My friends daughter is taking a job in California parking cars. She says she wants to be a valet girl. For sure. For sure.

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Teacher: You cant be here after school without a parent! Orphan: -no response-

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