Fight jokes

Once upon a time, there were three kingdoms, all bordering on the same lake. For centuries, these kingdoms had fought over an island in the middle of that lake. One day, they decided to have it out, once and for all. The first kingdom was quite rich, and sent an army of 25 knights, each with three squires. The night before the battle, the knights jousted

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What did one shoe say to the other shoe when they were fighting? I wanna sock you in the eye so bad!

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What’s the funniest thing about being ringside at a UFC fight? When you look around and all of the spectators are wearing white gowns and fuzzy socks, and you realize you aren’t at a UFC event, you’re watching your fellow patients fight to the death at a psychiatric facility.

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What are some another names for rape? There’s the classic “struggle snuggle” but then there’s my personal favorite “f@ck fight”

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My cat got in a fight. It was a catastrophe.

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Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? – Because the octopus was well armed.

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So there were kids in the bus and half of them were white and the other half was black, all the kids wanted to sit at the back so the bus driver said to all the kids stop fighting from now on everyone is now green, so the bus driver said to all the kids dark green go to the front and light green at the back.

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I don’t understand those couples that fight and a minute later change their Facebook status to single I fight with my parents but you don’t see me change my status to Orphan

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If an illegal immigrant fights against a child molester, would that be “Alien vs Predator”?

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My mom tells me and my sister to stop fighting mom! you and dad need to stop!

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why are cheetahs the best animals? The cheetah is the fastest land animal in the world. They can reach a top speed of around 113 km per hour. A cheetah can accelerate from 0 to 113 km in just a few seconds. Cheetahs are extremely fast however they tire quickly and can only keep up their top speed for a few minutes before they are too tired to continue. Cheetahs are smaller than other members of the big cat family, weighing only 45 – 60 kilograms. One way to always recognise a cheetah is by the long, black lines which run from the inside of each eye to the mouth. These are usually called “tear lines” and scientists believe they help protect the cheetah’s eyes from the harsh sun and help them to see long distances. Cheetahs are the only big cat that cannot roar. They can purr though and usually purr most loudly when they are grooming or sitting near other cheetahs. While lions and leopards usually do their hunting at night, cheetahs hunt for food during the day. A cheetah has amazing eyesight during the day and can spot prey from 5 km away. Cheetahs cannot climb trees and have poor night vision. With their light body weight and blunt claws, cheetahs are not well designed to protect themselves or their prey. When a larger or more aggressive animal approaches a cheetah in the wild, it will give up its catch to avoid a fight. Cheetahs only need to drink once every three to four days.

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I got in a cage fight the hampster dident cnow wat hit him

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The Numbers 19 and 20 got into a fight. 21!

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how do you break up blind people in a fight? scream i put my money on the guy with the knife

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What is black and white, black and white, black and white and green? Three zebras fighting over a pickle.

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