Fight jokes

If two vegetarians get into a fight, is it still called a beef?

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Things you never want to do in jail never piss off an inmate don’t start fights with the cops don’t drop the soap don’t run away from the cops

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When deaf people fight, they let their fists do the talking.

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So there were kids in the bus and half of them were white and the other half was black, all the kids wanted to sit at the back so the bus driver said to all the kids stop fighting from now on everyone is now green, so the bus driver said to all the kids dark green go to the front and light green at the back.

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I was cooking eggs the other day. It was very EGGxiting, all though, I was EGGxaggerating, but, if you think that wasn’t funny to you, then your hard boiled, that’s all for today YOLKS, so I said before several cats starting fighting, that sht was a CATastrophe, these kittens were all like “You’ve gotta be KITTEN me.” Mean while, in the ocean, they just waved, SEA what I did there? You SHORE you didn’t? Oh, alright, that’s okay bud- I guess these ocean puns are too DEEP for you. No? Okay- but, you know why the skeleton was lonely, eh? Oh, cause he had NO BODY. Why didn’t the skeleton ask the girl out? He didn’t have the guts. What did the skeleton do to his gf? He BNED her. No? Alright. Those didn’t make you laugh? Maybe I should hit your funny bone. My dad and cancer go into a fight never saw my dad after that

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Got into a fight last night. We both had blades. He cut me deep. I thought I was gone, but he forgot to keep the water running. Weird thing was that we were in the fight of our lives in the restroom and that guy kinda look like me.

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I got into a fight with 1, 3, 5, 7 and 9. – The odds were against me.

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Mom says : I will go kill myself Me : stays quite cuz knows better than to talk also me internally eyerolls Some time later me fighting with my mom Me to my mom : OH YEA THAN KILL ME Mom : What the hell did you just say I don’t want to hear it from u again Lesson? SO ITS OK FOR ADULTS TO SAY I’LL KILL MYSELF BUT NOT TEENS/KIDS!?!?! If a woman gets raped, just walk away, don’t bother. Cheer on the rapist if you want. They believe they are equal to men right? So they are able to fight back right? Then prove it! My EQUALITEHHHHHHHH

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Little Johnny walked into his parents room to see them going at it.He asked his mom what they were doing and she said uh were play fighting and he’s like with no clothes on and she said yeah and so he said let me join you then… Two friends were walking in a forest they started to fight. A cannibal came and shouted food fight!

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When I was young I got bullied by two kids, and whenever I got hit to the ground, I would get back up and cry. Then I had the courage to fight back. Except they didn’t get back up.

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