Fight jokes

How do you start a fight in space? “Comet me bro.”

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So my dad said to me and my sister don’t fight but did he mean “fist fight” or “yelling fight?”

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When I was young I got bullied by two kids, and whenever I got hit to the ground, I would get back up and cry. Then I had the courage to fight back. Except they didn’t get back up.

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North Korea and the martians were fighting about who was going the reach venus first. Trump steps in and says " That doesn’t matter american is going to land on the sun first". The martians and North Korea said “you can’t land on the sun it’s to hot and you will die”. Trump said his brilliant plan that “America is going to land their at night”.

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What is it called when Bill Cosby and a illegal immigrant fight? Aliens vs. Predator

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Why were condoms invented, so gay guys can have sword fights.

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i hate it when couples get into a little fight and the change their Facebook status to “single”. i have fights with my parents but I don’t change my Facebook status to “orphan”.

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One weekend some distant family members that I hadn’t met before came over. My cousins (who I also hadn’t met before) were fighting, so I decided to separate them and place them in opposite corners of the room (thinking it would help). My mom took me to an empty room with tears in her eyes, and told me they both ended up dying. Well, SO-RRY but I didnt know they’re conjoined twins.

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Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts

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how do you get two deaf people from fighting? turn off the lights and walk out.

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What happens when you throw an underaged boy between two catholic priests? They fight and… You know the rest.

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What is black and white, black and white, black and white and green? Three zebras fighting over a pickle.

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When you have to fight an emo kid but he brings his friends so you gotta fight the suicide squad. But you gotta get da bois to help you

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I’m just gonna say it. And don’t get offended but I’m so sick of the media bieng on the female side. It never shows what life is like for a male. Yes women do have it hard in life because they have to give birth etc. But men have it pretty hard too if not harder. Males are criticised for showing emotions. Men have to go to war on the front lines. Boys have less

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When deaf people fight, they let their fists do the talking.

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