Green jokes

What did the the purple grape say to the green grape? "BREATH YOU IDIOT BREATH!" Geddit? GeeditTT?

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

So a guy is taking a piss in a public bathroom. He looks over and sees a short guy with a very large green dick, who looks up at him and says “is there a problem boyoh?”. “I’m sorry, it’s just that thing is huge, and why the hell is it green?!”. The man reply’s “I’m a leprechaun”. “Really?” says the man. “That’s right. And I’ll grant you three wishes if you let me stick it in your pooper”. “Anything I want?! 3 of them?” reply’s the man. “Anything in your wildest dreams boyoh, but you have to let me finish”. The man bends over, and the leprechaun puts in in, thrusting back and forth he asks for the man’s first wish. “I want a giant yacht” “Aye”, says the leprechaun. “It’s pulling into your own private harbor now”. “For my second wish I want a billion dollars” the man says, beginning to sweat. “Aye, it’s stacked inside the yacht waiting for you” the leprechaun reply’s. “Okay”, the man groans in pain. “For my final wish I want this yacht to be full of beautiful women”. “You betcha boyoh” says the leprechaun. “The girls are there waiting for you nooWWW” as he lets out a moan of pleasure. The man exhausted and sore says “that was rough, but worth it for those wishes. Where do I go?” The little man with the giant green dick, pulling up his pants, his accent now gone says: “aren’t you a little old to be believing in leprechauns?”.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2


-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Hey amazing people! The Prankster is back! This prank was on my sister and her friends. (tbh I did not think she had friends.) I set out some snacks for them! Btw (I can’t be trusted). I gatherd some slapies. The things I gatherd where Tomatos, onions, milk, carrots, ice cream, and some dried out green beans! all that stuff! To the 4. I need the tomatos to make a sauce because I am going to put that with the ice cream, mix that up with the milk, yea yea it might look like a gross and nasty dish…WRONG!!! I am going to make it into a little snack…anyway we make that into a snack for her and her friends. The onions are used to make their eye’s cry and burn but I will give them a towl after that. The dried out green beens are just to make them go over the top and overreact because I did not cook them. After that we make it like its not so iky! I feed it to them! They overreacted! Please leave a comment. Byee!

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Why are Chinese so good at jay-walking? Cause they can’t tell the difference between green and red light with their tiny eyes.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2


So there were kids in the bus and half of them were white and the other half was black, all the kids wanted to sit at the back so the bus driver said to all the kids stop fighting from now on everyone is now green, so the bus driver said to all the kids dark green go to the front and light green at the back.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What is Green and red and goes round and round? A frog in a blender (this next one is pretty bad, and I don’t mean it, so don’t get offended) What’s the difference between a Mexican and a park bench? One can support an average family

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

A father of five puts on gas mask and a hazard suit, and walks outside, but before he could make it, his son came and asked “Dad, what are you wearing?”. The father would answer with “A costume for Halloween.”. the child asked “can i join?”. He said no, for he said it’s their last Halloween. *after that, I saw green smoke all over the same house they lived in.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *


© àíåêäîòîâ.net, 1997 - 2026