Green jokes

whats red green and slimy and slids down the chipshop window . abortion of chips

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What did the the purple grape say to the green grape? "BREATH YOU IDIOT BREATH!" Geddit? GeeditTT?

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Hoow on god’s green earth does my boyfriend have a phone? JK WE NEED TO TALK ILL TYPE THE SECRET CODE (YOU’LL KNOW WHAT IT MEANS.) GREEN PUSSY CAT LIKES BANNANS.

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There was a fancy dress party the theme was emotions. one guy came dressed in green and he was envy, another person came dressed in red and she was anger another guy came dressed in blue and he was sadness. Two indians came, one came with a hole in a pear and his d*** was in the pear said he was deep in dispear, the other indian came with his d*** in custard and he said he was f***ing dicustard

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The teacher asked her class to use definitely in a sentence. Little Johnny raised his hand to answer, yet the teacher passed him and went on to Kevin. “The sky is definitely blue.” “Very good Kevin,but the sky can also be blue or black.” the teacher replied. Little Johnny raised his hand again as high as he could, yet the teacher passed right over him. And picked Annie from the back of the room. “The grass is definitely green.” “Very good Annie, but it can also be brown.” Little Johnny was waving his hand like crazy seeking her attention. Finally she called on him. “Mines more of a question, but do farts have lumps in them?” “Why no Johnny why would you ask such a question?” She questioned. “Well if they don’t have lumps in them, then I definitely just shit myself.”

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Everytime i come in the kitchen my girl is in the kitchen in the damn refrigerator eating all the food like the fried chicken the mashed potatoes the collard greens mac and cheese and the corn bread. Then i said i wanna eat some of that shit i love soul food then i told her you keep it up your fat ass is going to big like house on a haunted hill.

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What’s green and orange and sits at the bottom of the swimming pool? A baby with burst armbands

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What is green and blue Grass and the sky

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Me: Know one likes shrek he is just a fat green guy friend hey stop talking about me

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What Football Club das Mason green wood play for? Prison Fc

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Why do elephants paint their toes red, blue, green, orange, Brown and yellow? So they can hide in a bag of M&Ms

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What is 14 inches long and starts with D A Dookie From GREEN DAY

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I could be red I could be orange I could be yellow I could be green, I could be blue I could be purple but I would be dead

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Jack quietly crawled through Jill’s bedroom window, trying not to make a single noise. She sat on her bed, her back facing him. Jack tiptoed up behind her, laid his hands on her shoulders and said, in a rather sensual tone, “Boo.” “Jack!” She yelled, “what are you doing here?” Jack sat down next to her and smiled. “I figured today was a

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What’s green and smells like pork? Kermit’s finger

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