Interviewer: what are your strengths? Interviewee: I fall in love easily. Interviewer: and your weaknesses? Interviewee: those beautiful green eyes of yours…
What happen when someone shot the Hulk? He got gangryeen. Gangrene+green+angry
Kid sees their grandma taking pills and asks… “Grandma, why do you need to take all those pills?” “Well, Grandma needs to take the green medicine for her headaches, but the green pills give her diarrhea. So grandma needs to take the yellow pills for diarrhea but those pills always make grandma very depressed. Because of her depression, grandma needs to take the black pills, but those always give her high blood pressure. To cure the high blood pressure, grandma has to take the red pills, but those make her always very horny. That’s why grandpa has to take the blue pills.”
What is the difference between a climate change and the green house effect once a philosopher twice a sodomite
what turns green to red in a flick of a switch?A frog in a blender.
I found alien in my backyard I put him to work. He went to farm never seen him again moments later he is on daily planet acting as reporter a green rock smashed my house. I called him back he passed out. I remarked you lazy
Why did the carrots laugh? They saw Mrs. Green Pea over the fence.
What did the green grape say to the purple grape? Breathe… Breathe…
What’s big, green, has four legs and if it falls out of a tree it can kill you? A pool table.
what’s green then red all over? a frog in a blender! :)
Whats green and furry Fiona from Shrek
What’s red and sits in the corner? A baby chewing on a razor blade. What’s green and sits in the corner? Same baby, one week later.
What is Green and red and goes round and round? A frog in a blender (this next one is pretty bad, and I don’t mean it, so don’t get offended) What’s the difference between a Mexican and a park bench? One can support an average family
whats green and sings? ELVIS PARSELY!!!
what fruit is square and green? a lemon in disguise
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