What is it called when you hit your funny bone at night? Dark humor.
Yo mama’s so stupid, she got hit by a parked car.
I’d Hit You But I Don’t Wanna Go To Jail For Animal Abuse.
Why did little Timmy drop his ice cream cone? He got hit by a bus.
Whole reason he is dead is because he kept hitting ‘Remind me later’ on his Windows Updates. When you going 80 mph and hit a speed bump Then the speed bump starts screaming
what is the difference between a baby and a watermelon, one smashes open when you hit it with a sledge hammer and the other is a water melon Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn’t, I hit it with my car 3 blocks down
What is stronger than family. The tree Paul Walker hit
What’s worse than depression & suicide? Easy : LIVING Everyday you wish you were dead but than reality hits u in the face that your still alive and has to suffer living Pretend or not pretend we have to decide everyday even if we don’t pretend no onw will notice :) no one ever does :) Living is the problem to everything we get depression cuz of it and so much why can’t we just die :) ?
if you hit a child that’s child abuse. if you hit a family member that’s abuse. if you kill either, it’s murder for some reason. if it’s a whole family, its genocide for another reason.
Best friend: dude your sister is hot i’d Hit that Me: already did SWEEETT HOMMEE ALABAMA
What’s the difference between an orphan and a watermelon? One of them is fun to hit with a sledge hammer and the other one is just a watermelon
My ex girlfriend got hit by a bus. I also lost my bus drivers licence.
The weirdest thing happend to me today i was driving 50mph and hit a speedbump aand it screamed
What’s the definition of “perfect pitch?” Throwing a viola into the dumpster without hitting the rim.
So this guy and his wife figure out that she has gotten pregnant. The baby is due March 31st. Well the guy is at work and he gets a call from his wife. She tells him she is going into labor. He rushes to pick her up, and once he is on the road he starts speeding. Eventually he hits another car and swerves off the road into a ditch. He wakes up in the hospital, looks around but doesn’t see his wife. He asks the doctor, is my wife okay, she was carrying my child. The doctor said the wife is fine and the baby is in good health. 10 seconds later he goes “APRIL FOOLS! Your wife is dead and your child has brain damage
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