Hit jokes

Today was a bad day. First My ex got hit by a bus. Then I lost my job as a bus driver

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Yo mama so dumb she got hit by a cup and told the police she got mugged.

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Why did Joey drop his ice cream? He was hit by a truck. (Don’t worry, the truck was fine.)

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I was wondering why the frisbee was getting bigger, then it hit me.

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Why did little Timmy drop his ice cream cone? He got hit by a bus.

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What do you do when your dish washer stops working Hit your wife harder

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Why did timmy drop his ice cream cone… He got hit by a train

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What happened to the blind man’s son. He thought he was hitting a pinyata.

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A german soldier is walking down the street during a hail storm when a lady suddenly falls over after being hit. He, along with a few others, walk over to her. One man asks, “What happened?” and the soldier replies, “Hail hit her.” (say the joke aloud and it will make more sense)

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Why was I stress eating on the train track? To wait to get hit.

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What’s the definition of “perfect pitch?” Throwing a viola into the dumpster without hitting the rim.

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When an emo kid jumps out of a tree what happens when he hits the ground? Nothin much he just flops over an hour later when they untie the rope

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Friends are like trees, they fall over if you hit them with an ax.

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Student: 503 bricks are on a plane. 1 falls off. How many are left? Teacher: 502. Student: How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Teacher:No you can’t fit an elephant in a fridge!! Student: Just open door, put elephant in, close door. Student: How do you put a giraffe in the fridge? Teacher: open door,put giraffe in, close door Student: no! Open door, take elephant out, put giraffe in, close door. Student: The Lion King is having a B-day party. All the animals are there, except one. Which one? Teacher: let me guess the lion? Student: No!The giraffe because He’s in a fridge. Teacher: WOW! Student: Sally has to get across a large river home to many alligators. They are very dangerous, but Sally swims across safely. How? Teacher: Sally stepped on the alligators mouth? Student:The gators are at the party. Student: But Sally dies anyway. Why? Teacher:She drowned?! Student: no! She got hit in the head by a flying brick.

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I’m not saying I hate you. But if you got hit by a bus I’d be driving that bus.

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