Hit jokes

I’m not saying I hate you. But if you got hit by a bus I’d be driving that bus.

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Why did Joey drop his ice cream? He was hit by a truck. (Don’t worry, the truck was fine.)

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There were three people on the third floor of a building the first one took a bite of a apple then said it was too hard so he threw it out the window the second person took a bite of a lemon he said it was too sour so he threw it out the window the third guy was drunk, he took a bite of a grenade and thought it was to crunchy so he threw it out the window then one of them went downstairs he saw a dog laying on the ground dead the apple had hit the dog in the head then there was a little girl crying with her cat in her lap it had died because the lemon fell out the window and hit it in the head next there was a old guy laughing i asked him why he was laugh he said “i farted and the building behind me blew up”.

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Yo mama so dumb she got hit by a cup and told the police she got mugged.

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Why did i walk across the road? to get hit by a car

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What is it called when you hit your funny bone at night? Dark humor.

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Today was a terrible day. My wife got hit by a bus, and I lost my job as a bus driver

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Why did the kid drop his icecream? He got hit by a bus.

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Friends are like trees, they fall over if you hit them with an ax.

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The weirdest thing happend to me today i was driving 50mph and hit a speedbump aand it screamed

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Why done orphans get offended by dark humor? It doesn’t hit home

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I hit a ball with a bat it was called animal abuse

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friend: hits head* others: how many fingers am i holding up? me: to friend* how suicidal am i on a scale from one to ten? friend: ten me: hes fine guys

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So Johnny was in kindergarten and his teacher assigned him to learn the ABC’s so he goes home and ask his mom who’s cooking “Whats the first letter of the ABC’s?” he ask and his mom responds with “SHUT UP… I’M COOKING!” so then he walks to sister who’s signing in the shower and asks her “Whats the 2nd letter of the ABC’s?” she responds with “I’m ready

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When an emo kid jumps out of a tree what happens when he hits the ground? Nothin much he just flops over an hour later when they untie the rope

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