Why don’t orphans get offended by dark humour jokes? It can’t hit home.
Yo mama’s so stupid, she got hit by a parked car.
making fun of someone you’re angry with is childish. Be an adult and hit them with your car <3
Why was I stress eating on the train track? To wait to get hit.
Three blondes were taking a walk when they stumbled on some tracks. They argued on what the tracks came from. One of them said “it’s a deer.” The other said it “No it’s a coyote.” The last one was going to give her thoughts, but that was when the train hit them.
what did Chris Brown say when he saw Rhianna “I’d hit that”
Why did the kid drop his icecream? He got hit by a bus.
What’s black and white and red all over? The prisoner I just hit with my car.
What is a suicide packs favorite song… Let the bodies hit floor
An apple and an emo kid fall off a tree at the same time. Who hits the ground first? The apple because the emo kid got caught by the rope
So this guy and his wife figure out that she has gotten pregnant. The baby is due March 31st. Well the guy is at work and he gets a call from his wife. She tells him she is going into labor. He rushes to pick her up, and once he is on the road he starts speeding. Eventually he hits another car and swerves off the road into a ditch. He wakes up in the hospital, looks around but doesn’t see his wife. He asks the doctor, is my wife okay, she was carrying my child. The doctor said the wife is fine and the baby is in good health. 10 seconds later he goes “APRIL FOOLS! Your wife is dead and your child has brain damage
My life is a lot like a game of Black Jack I always hit on 16, the get busted
a man walks into a bar, and notices a steak hanging from the ceiling. when he asks the bartender about it, the bartender says “If you can jump up and hit it, drinks are on the house for the night, but if you miss, everyone’s drinks are on your tab for the next two hours. Do you want to try? ” the man decided not to take the risk. he thought the steaks where too high.
Friends are like trees, they fall over if you hit them with an ax.
Who reads the fastest? The pilot of the plane who hit one of the twin towers, He took out 83 stories in one go.
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