I lost my drivers license today i hit my ex with my car
I hit a ball with a bat it was called animal abuse
Why did Joey drop his ice cream? He was hit by a truck. (Don’t worry, the truck was fine.)
I got hit in the head with a can of soda yesterday. Luckily for me, it was a soft drink.
What did the fish say when it hit the wall? Dam. What did the other fish say to that fish when he hit the wall? Dumb Bass.
When you hit a speed bump in a school zone and remember, there are no speed bumps.
So Johnny was in kindergarten and his teacher assigned him to learn the ABC’s so he goes home and ask his mom who’s cooking “Whats the first letter of the ABC’s?” he ask and his mom responds with “SHUT UP… I’M COOKING!” so then he walks to sister who’s signing in the shower and asks her “Whats the 2nd letter of the ABC’s?” she responds with “I’m ready
I was hit on by president kennedy, too bad i shot him down
There were once three brothers, Shit, Shut up and Manners. One day Shit got hit by a car. Shut up went to find help at the local police station whilst Manners tried to help Shit. When Shut up got to the police station he says “my brother has just been hit by a car.” The policeman replied with “OK then first I need to know your name.” “Shut up” “No, I need to know your name.” “Shut up. ” “Excuse me but where are your manners.” “Round the corner picking up shit.”
Yo mama’s so stupid, she got hit by a parked car.
what is the difference between a baby and a watermelon, one smashes open when you hit it with a sledge hammer and the other is a water melon Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn’t, I hit it with my car 3 blocks down
titanic - “yo look at that sexy babe of an iceberg, lets hit her” (Set up joke for the actual joke) So why don’t blind people go sky diving? It scares the hell out of their seeing eye dog. (Actual joke) When does a blind person know when he’s about to hit the ground? The leash goes slack.
What’s a similarity between your best friend and a tree? They both fall over when you hit them with an axe.
What did the fish say before he hit the wall? – “Oh, dam.”
I’d Hit You But I Don’t Wanna Go To Jail For Animal Abuse.
RUS | ENG
