I never wanted to believe that my Dad was stealing from his job as a road worker. But when I got home, all the signs were there.
Last Night I had a dream I was swimming in lemonade… turns out I peed the bed. What’s a spider-man’s dream job? Web developer
My ex died today. I also lost my job as a butcher
You dream with 4k As a son I was starting to do pranks. I told my mom’s boyfriend that she cheated on him, and she don’t want to be with him no more, and I told him that my mom said that he had a small penis. He left my mom, and she was mad at me. I thought it was funny. Then I told my friend girlfriend that he cheated on her with another girl, and the girl told me that my friend had a small penis. He found out, and wanted to co front me in my house. I wasn’t home. My friend told my mom what happen then my mom said the same thing happen to me. I came home one day I saw my mom giving my friend a blow job I ask what’s going on. My friend told your mom is my new girlfriend & my mom said this is the penis of my dreams.
“I work with animals” the man said to his date. his date said “I love a man who works with animals what job is it for the animal” “I am a butcher” said the man
I lost my job by giving up my seat to someone I didn’t know you’re not supposed to do that if you’re a bus driver!
One day I was going home, and 7 married men came to me and said you should be proud of your sister. I ask why they told me it was the best that they ever had and we got your sister a trophy. So I went home my sister said look at my trophy I earned. The trophy said The Best Blow Jobs. As a bro I couldn’t be more prouder.
I just quit my job at a can crushing factory. It was soda-pressing.
Guy asked me what I do for a living. Now I’m not old enough to get a job so I said nothing. He asked me again so I said, “Your wife” The guy goes to slap me but his wife is standing right there. She instead slapped me and said, “You swore not to tell!”
Today my EX got trampled by a bunch of horse and sadly I lost my job as a horse trainer.
Why can’t orphans get a job? Because they don’t have a home.
Today was a terrible day. My wife got hit by a bus, and I lost my job as a bus driver
What is a pedophiles favorite job? The mall santa.
If you were to ask me, ‘What is the easiest job in the world?’, it would be an Australian psychiatrist. “G’Day, G’Day…how you doing…no worries, next!”.
Why is there a lot of whites in hockey? It’s the only other job that involves beating something black other than being a cop
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