I want a job cleaning mirrors, I could really see myself doing it ??
My ex died today. I also lost my job as a butcher
As a son I like sports and I watch sports with my mom. So one day we were looking at football. My mom ask me who makes the most money I said the quarter back. My mom told me I going to get a quarter back has my new boyfriend and it be your new step father. a week lady my mom went out I came home I see my mom making out with a high school kid. I said whats going on my mom said look my new boyfriend and new step father is the high school quarter back. My mom said see mission accomplish. I said yeah job well done.
“I work with animals” the man said to his date. his date said “I love a man who works with animals what job is it for the animal” “I am a butcher” said the man
Why can’t orphans get a job? Because they don’t have a home.
Boobs are like batteries… AA will get the job done… C is bigger than AA… D is bigger that C… …and if they’re square, you don’t want to put your tongue on them!
My girlfriend got ran over by a bus I lost my job as a bus driver.
One day I was going home, and 7 married men came to me and said you should be proud of your sister. I ask why they told me it was the best that they ever had and we got your sister a trophy. So I went home my sister said look at my trophy I earned. The trophy said The Best Blow Jobs. As a bro I couldn’t be more prouder.
I just got a job at the prison library. It has its prose and cons.
I kept asking these kids where there parents are and they started crying, I walked away laughing thinking i love my job at an orphanage
Why did the girl quit her job at the donut factory? – She was fed up with the hole business.
I hate these double standards. if you burn a body at a crematorium you’re "doing a good job" if you do it at home you’re “destroying evidence”
what’s the difference between a pizza delivery guy and a cop. pizza guys get punished for not doing their jobs properly
You dream with 4k As a son I was starting to do pranks. I told my mom’s boyfriend that she cheated on him, and she don’t want to be with him no more, and I told him that my mom said that he had a small penis. He left my mom, and she was mad at me. I thought it was funny. Then I told my friend girlfriend that he cheated on her with another girl, and the girl told me that my friend had a small penis. He found out, and wanted to co front me in my house. I wasn’t home. My friend told my mom what happen then my mom said the same thing happen to me. I came home one day I saw my mom giving my friend a blow job I ask what’s going on. My friend told your mom is my new girlfriend & my mom said this is the penis of my dreams.
I was working for Space X. I was instructed to control a satellite’s orbit rotation when suddenly the screen went black. I investigated and found out one of Penaldos penalty had hit and destroyed the satellite. Shame on you Penaldo for ruining my dream job!
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