i just found out my ex got stabbed today…lets just say i lost my job as a butcher
Today was a bad day. First My ex got hit by a bus. Then I lost my job as a bus driver
roses are red my blood is too i see a lot when i lost u
Today my EX got trampled by a bunch of horse and sadly I lost my job as a horse trainer.
Today I learned that a group of piranhas can maul a small child down to the bone in under 20 seconds. Well I lost my job at the aquarium today.
I tried to sue the airport for misplacing my luggage. – I lost my case.
Why does Spiderman only have 11 months in his calendar Because he Lost May!!
Location is in London by the way. One day a fatass came home and told his friend that he lost money. His friend, “Oh for once you lost some pounds!”
Two atoms are walking down the street and they run in to each other. One says to the other, “Are you all right?” “No, I lost an electron!” “Are you sure?” “Yeah, I’m positive!”
Three men are travelling through the desert when their single camel dies. They walk for a while but then it becomes night. Desperate for shelter, suddenly they stumble across a tent and inside is three beautiful women. The men were not only lost but horny too so they begin to have sex with the women. But the tent belongs to a prince and these three women were his wives so he is very angry when he arrives an hour later and sees three strangers having sex with his wives. He tells the three men he will chop off their penises as punishment, in some way relating to their job. He asks the first man what his job is: The guy says, "I’m a fireman" The prince says, "Then we’ll burn your dick off!" The second guy says, "I’m an employee at the shooting range" The prince says, "Then we’ll shoot your dick off! " The third guy smiles and says, "I’m a lollipop salesman
“why did the Carthaginian say Rome lost the war? -because they were just roman around”
%%Why Did The Columbine High School Basketball Team Lose The Big Game? Because They Lost Their Two Best Shooters…
Why are Americans so bad at clash Royale Because they’ve already lost 2 towers
Why are Americans bad chess players? They lost two towers.
Your forehead is so big, Megamind though he was your long lost sibling. (me)
RUS | ENG
