One night, I saw a woman sitting behind a dumpster. So I took her home. We talked all the way there. When we got home, I gave her a bath. Later on, things started getting passionate. We started doing intercourse, and some of the noises she made you would have thought she was still alive! My girlfriend dumped me, so I stole her wheelchair Guess who came crawling back
What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where’s my tractor?
A guy goes to Starbucks and asks”Hey, if I can make you laugh I don’t have to pay.”The girl in the window says,”ok.”The guys says,”A little boy named Timmy lost his arms.”The girl says,” oh no!”The guy says”and his dad left him when he was 4.”The girl says “uhh yeah.” The guy says”Ok,I guess I’ll be paying then” The girl asks”Ok, And what name will that be under?”The guy says”Timmy,I’m Timmy.”
Chris Rock: Jada I can’t wait to see you in G.I Jane 2! Fresh Prince of Bel-Air theme song starts playing: Will: I got in one lil fight about my wife’s lost hair, she said,‘’ Will if you don’t do something I’m gonna have an affair!‘’ ??????
Two atoms are walking down the street and they run in to each other. One says to the other, “Are you all right?” “No, I lost an electron!” “Are you sure?” “Yeah, I’m positive!”
What do you call a Mexican who lost his car? Carlos.
I tried to sue the airline for losing my luggage. I lost my case.
Why are Americans so bad at clash Royale Because they’ve already lost 2 towers
Where did Suzy go after getting lost on a minefield? Everywhere
i just found out my ex got stabbed today…lets just say i lost my job as a butcher
My ex girlfriend got hit by a bus. I also lost my bus drivers licence.
Looks like I lost an electron, I should keep a better ion them.
How did Stephen Hawking Die, He lost WiFi Connection.
My girlfriend got ran over by a bus I lost my job as a bus driver.
I tried to find my watch I lost last week but I didn’t have the time
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