Lost jokes

I tried to sue the airline for losing my luggage. I lost my case.

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A little kid was lost and he asked me to find his home, I love working at the orphanage

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My cousin: Brother I lost in a game of Call of Duty: Moe Bill [he was supposed to pronounce it as mobile however I left it as it is] Me: so tell me about it then. My cousin: I lost to Sum_Baldi Me: somebody? Don’t they have like the name of you opponents? My cousin: no no no the name was Sum_Baldi. S.U.M_B.A.L.D.I Me: Ok my bad. Continue My cousin: I got Sum_Baldi and 5 seconds later I got kill but [by] Sum_Fing_Wong. Me: it’s not wrong! In call of duty, you are suppose to kill or be killed. My cousin: no no no the name was Sum_Fing_Wong. S.U.M_F.I.N.G_W.O.N.G Me: my bad again. Do continue. My cousin: I got so angry I blowup Me: so you got blowed up, by what weapon? My cousin: by the game. Me: [was not expecting that for an answer]

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One night, I saw a woman sitting behind a dumpster. So I took her home. We talked all the way there. When we got home, I gave her a bath. Later on, things started getting passionate. We started doing intercourse, and some of the noises she made you would have thought she was still alive! My girlfriend dumped me, so I stole her wheelchair Guess who came crawling back

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what do u call a mexican who’s lost his car carlos

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Why couldn’t the dairy farmer find his home ? He lost the whey!??

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what was the name of the Mexican that lost his car? Carlos

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Your forehead is so big, Megamind though he was your long lost sibling. (me)

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How do you know Americas bad at chess They lost 2 towers

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%%Why Did The Columbine High School Basketball Team Lose The Big Game? Because They Lost Their Two Best Shooters…

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A man lost his toe when he dropped a knife on it: Doctor: I have good news and bad news Guy" Whats the bad news Doc: They replaced your toe with a piece of candy Guy: Good news? Doc: You now have tic tac toe

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I lost my job at the bank on my very first day. – A woman asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.

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Today was a bad day. First My ex got hit by a bus. Then I lost my job as a bus driver

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An orphan walks into a supermarket, gets lost calls for his mum then remembers

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Why are Americans bad chess players? They lost two towers.

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