Lost jokes

Two atoms are walking down the street and they run in to each other. One says to the other, “Are you all right?” “No, I lost an electron!” “Are you sure?” “Yeah, I’m positive!”

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A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were all lost in the desert. They found a lamp and rubbed it. A genie popped out and granted them each one wish. The redhead wished to be back home. Poof! She was back home. The brunette wished to be at home with her family. Poof! She was back home with her family. The blonde said, “Awwww, I wish my friends were here.”

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One night, I saw a woman sitting behind a dumpster. So I took her home. We talked all the way there. When we got home, I gave her a bath. Later on, things started getting passionate. We started doing intercourse, and some of the noises she made you would have thought she was still alive! My girlfriend dumped me, so I stole her wheelchair Guess who came crawling back

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What do you call a Mexican who lost his car? Carlos.

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Today my EX got trampled by a bunch of horse and sadly I lost my job as a horse trainer.

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I tried to sue the airport for misplacing my luggage. – I lost my case.

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I always sucked at mazes. I found myself lost over and over again but if life is a labyrinth, I’d always find the escape. The final dead end, my personal favourite…

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I lost my black friend in the shadows. I lost my white friend on the wall. I lost my Asian friend in the sand and I lost my Islamic friend in the bombings.

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Today was a bad day. First My ex got hit by a bus. Then I lost my job as a bus driver

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A man lost his toe when he dropped a knife on it: Doctor: I have good news and bad news Guy" Whats the bad news Doc: They replaced your toe with a piece of candy Guy: Good news? Doc: You now have tic tac toe

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What do you call a lost indian women? Ms Singh

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A woman gets rid of polish with chemicals and no one bats an eye The Germans got rid of polish with chemicals and everyone lost their mind

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I lost my job at the bank on my very first day. – A woman asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.

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I lost a race with a handicapped person today. The problem was the race was all stairs. Gravity sure is fast

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where’s my tractor?

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