Today was a terrible day. My wife got hit by a bus, and I lost my job as a bus driver
Your forehead is so big, Megamind though he was your long lost sibling. (me)
Where did the cat go when it lost it’s tail? – To the retail store!
Today my EX got trampled by a bunch of horse and sadly I lost my job as a horse trainer.
Yo mama’s so stupid, when I told her that she lost her mind, she went looking for it
A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were all lost in the desert. They found a lamp and rubbed it. A genie popped out and granted them each one wish. The redhead wished to be back home. Poof! She was back home. The brunette wished to be at home with her family. Poof! She was back home with her family. The blonde said, “Awwww, I wish my friends were here.”
My ex girlfriend got hit by a bus. I also lost my bus drivers licence.
My girlfriend got ran over by a bus I lost my job as a bus driver.
One night, I saw a woman sitting behind a dumpster. So I took her home. We talked all the way there. When we got home, I gave her a bath. Later on, things started getting passionate. We started doing intercourse, and some of the noises she made you would have thought she was still alive! My girlfriend dumped me, so I stole her wheelchair Guess who came crawling back
why are americans so bad at chess? Because they lost two towers
Why does Spiderman only have 11 months in his calendar Because he Lost May!!
I always sucked at mazes. I found myself lost over and over again but if life is a labyrinth, I’d always find the escape. The final dead end, my personal favourite…
Why does Spider-Man only have 11 months? He lost may.
what was the name of the Mexican that lost his car? Carlos
How do you know that the U.S. suck at chess/ They lost two towers.
RUS | ENG
