Lost jokes

My Mum texted me she had lost her phone

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Today my EX got trampled by a bunch of horse and sadly I lost my job as a horse trainer.

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Why do the japanese hate Christmas??? Becasue the last time a Fat Man came down the chimney, they lost half their population

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I used to be a banker but I lost interest… Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team? She always ran away from the ball. Why can’t bikes stand? Because they are two tired (Too tired)

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A little kid was lost and he asked me to find his home, I love working at the orphanage

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What dose an Orphan and a lost kid have in comen. They have no way home

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My ex girlfriend got hit by a bus. I also lost my bus drivers licence.

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Where did Joe go after getting lost on the mine field? Everywhere.

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I tried to sue the airline for losing my luggage. I lost my case.

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“why did the Carthaginian say Rome lost the war? -because they were just roman around”

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i just found out my ex got stabbed today…lets just say i lost my job as a butcher

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Your forehead is so big, Megamind though he was your long lost sibling. (me)

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Two atoms are walking down the street and they run in to each other. One says to the other, “Are you all right?” “No, I lost an electron!” “Are you sure?” “Yeah, I’m positive!”

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My dad is like my virginity. I lost him at 12

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Why does Spider-Man only have 11 months? He lost may.

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