What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where’s my tractor?
Looks like I lost an electron, I should keep a better ion them.
when the quiet kid lost a game of basket ball and reaches in to his bag other people in gym: oh shit this nigga bouta shot
i just found out my ex got stabbed today…lets just say i lost my job as a butcher
What do you call a magician who has lost their magic? Ian.
My cousin: Brother I lost in a game of Call of Duty: Moe Bill [he was supposed to pronounce it as mobile however I left it as it is] Me: so tell me about it then. My cousin: I lost to Sum_Baldi Me: somebody? Don’t they have like the name of you opponents? My cousin: no no no the name was Sum_Baldi. S.U.M_B.A.L.D.I Me: Ok my bad. Continue My cousin: I got Sum_Baldi and 5 seconds later I got kill but [by] Sum_Fing_Wong. Me: it’s not wrong! In call of duty, you are suppose to kill or be killed. My cousin: no no no the name was Sum_Fing_Wong. S.U.M_F.I.N.G_W.O.N.G Me: my bad again. Do continue. My cousin: I got so angry I blowup Me: so you got blowed up, by what weapon? My cousin: by the game. Me: [was not expecting that for an answer]
A woman gets rid of polish with chemicals and no one bats an eye The Germans got rid of polish with chemicals and everyone lost their mind
%%Why Did The Columbine High School Basketball Team Lose The Big Game? Because They Lost Their Two Best Shooters…
My girlfriend got ran over by a bus I lost my job as a bus driver.
Two atom soldiers are fighting against an army. One gets shot. He cried out, im hit! I think I’ve lost an electron! Are you sure? Asks the other. Im positive! This one as actually physics(unlike some other joke here, ahem cough cough)
I lost my drivers license today i hit my ex with my car
Two atoms are walking down the street and they run in to each other. One says to the other, “Are you all right?” “No, I lost an electron!” “Are you sure?” “Yeah, I’m positive!”
I tried to find my watch I lost last week but I didn’t have the time
Why does us suck at chess? we lost both our towers. Why is england so good at chess? they still have their queen. Why does russia suck at chess? they only have pawns
An orphan walks into a supermarket, gets lost calls for his mum then remembers
RUS | ENG