Lost jokes

I lost a race with a handicapped person today. The problem was the race was all stairs. Gravity sure is fast

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“You look like you’ve lost some weight.” “Really? Well, whatever weight I lost, you found it, pal!”

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Why does us suck at chess? we lost both our towers. Why is england so good at chess? they still have their queen. Why does russia suck at chess? they only have pawns

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whats one thing youll never find in lost and found? your dad

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Why do the japanese hate Christmas??? Becasue the last time a Fat Man came down the chimney, they lost half their population

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I lost at Kahoot so I had to ka-shoot

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A man from France, a man from Britain, and a man from New York are on an exposition to the Amazon Forest. After a while they get lost. So as they are walking suddenly the bushes jump up into the air and men with spears are there. One man says "Hey, your in our sacred land. So what we are going to do is skin you and then use your flesh to make canoes. But we aren’t that crazy so we will let you choose how you die." The man from France said, "bring me the poison." The man from Britain said, "bring me the gun" And the man from New York said, "bring me a fork" The guy was confused with the fork but still brought it the items and gave it to them. The guy from France said, “for the France!” And drank the poison and died. The man from Britain said, “long live the queen!” And shot himself and died. And the man from New York started stabbing himself with the fork and said “MAKE A CANOE OUT OF THIS YOU f@ckERS”

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I used to be a banker but I lost interest… Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team? She always ran away from the ball. Why can’t bikes stand? Because they are two tired (Too tired)

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