A man in conversation with his friend says that his wife is on a 3-week diet. The friend curiously asks, how much has she lost? The man replies, “her life.”
My Mum texted me she had lost her phone
How do you know that the U.S. suck at chess/ They lost two towers.
Where did the cat go when it lost it’s tail? – To the retail store!
I tried to find my watch I lost last week but I didn’t have the time
what was the name of the Mexican that lost his car? Carlos
Your forehead is so big, Megamind though he was your long lost sibling. (me)
As I get older, I remember all the people I lost along the way. Maybe a career as a tour guide was not the right choice.
What do you call a magician who has lost their magic? Ian.
Two atoms are walking down the street and they run in to each other. One says to the other, “Are you all right?” “No, I lost an electron!” “Are you sure?” “Yeah, I’m positive!”
So you know those people that commit suicide by hanging them selves I guess they lost Hangman
“why did the Carthaginian say Rome lost the war? -because they were just roman around”
Three men are travelling through the desert when their single camel dies. They walk for a while but then it becomes night. Desperate for shelter, suddenly they stumble across a tent and inside is three beautiful women. The men were not only lost but horny too so they begin to have sex with the women. But the tent belongs to a prince and these three women were his wives so he is very angry when he arrives an hour later and sees three strangers having sex with his wives. He tells the three men he will chop off their penises as punishment, in some way relating to their job. He asks the first man what his job is: The guy says, "I’m a fireman" The prince says, "Then we’ll burn your dick off!" The second guy says, "I’m an employee at the shooting range" The prince says, "Then we’ll shoot your dick off! " The third guy smiles and says, "I’m a lollipop salesman
Why do Americans suck at chess… because they lost two towers Me: I have lost it. Random: Lost what? Me: My will to live.
Why are Americans so bad at clash Royale Because they’ve already lost 2 towers
RUS | ENG
