Lost jokes

A man lost his toe when he dropped a knife on it: Doctor: I have good news and bad news Guy" Whats the bad news Doc: They replaced your toe with a piece of candy Guy: Good news? Doc: You now have tic tac toe

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How do you know Americas bad at chess They lost 2 towers

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Yo mama so fat i stood next to her and lost cell phone reception

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Why does Spiderman only have 11 months in his calendar Because he Lost May!!

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Why is the USA bad a at clash Royale?, cause they already lost two towers

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Why don’t orphans like to get lost?? Because somebody’s going to ask where their parents are. There was an American wrestler from Texas named John, who throughout his high school career had never lost a match. As he went on into college he continued undefeated. He became a national icon and symbol of American strength. News began to circulate of a Russian

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what was the name of the Mexican that lost his car? Carlos

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So you know those people that commit suicide by hanging them selves I guess they lost Hangman

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A man from France, a man from Britain, and a man from New York are on an exposition to the Amazon Forest. After a while they get lost. So as they are walking suddenly the bushes jump up into the air and men with spears are there. One man says "Hey, your in our sacred land. So what we are going to do is skin you and then use your flesh to make canoes. But we aren’t that crazy so we will let you choose how you die." The man from France said, "bring me the poison." The man from Britain said, "bring me the gun" And the man from New York said, "bring me a fork" The guy was confused with the fork but still brought it the items and gave it to them. The guy from France said, “for the France!” And drank the poison and died. The man from Britain said, “long live the queen!” And shot himself and died. And the man from New York started stabbing himself with the fork and said “MAKE A CANOE OUT OF THIS YOU f@ckERS”

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My Mum texted me she had lost her phone

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Why does us suck at chess? we lost both our towers. Why is england so good at chess? they still have their queen. Why does russia suck at chess? they only have pawns

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A man in conversation with his friend says that his wife is on a 3-week diet. The friend curiously asks, how much has she lost? The man replies, “her life.”

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My ex girlfriend got hit by a bus. I also lost my bus drivers licence.

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i just found out my ex got stabbed today…lets just say i lost my job as a butcher

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why are americans so bad at chess? Because they lost two towers

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