Lost jokes

One night, I saw a woman sitting behind a dumpster. So I took her home. We talked all the way there. When we got home, I gave her a bath. Later on, things started getting passionate. We started doing intercourse, and some of the noises she made you would have thought she was still alive! My girlfriend dumped me, so I stole her wheelchair Guess who came crawling back

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A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were all lost in the desert. They found a lamp and rubbed it. A genie popped out and granted them each one wish. The redhead wished to be back home. Poof! She was back home. The brunette wished to be at home with her family. Poof! She was back home with her family. The blonde said, “Awwww, I wish my friends were here.”

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A man lost his toe when he dropped a knife on it: Doctor: I have good news and bad news Guy" Whats the bad news Doc: They replaced your toe with a piece of candy Guy: Good news? Doc: You now have tic tac toe

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Today my EX got trampled by a bunch of horse and sadly I lost my job as a horse trainer.

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Why do the japanese hate Christmas??? Becasue the last time a Fat Man came down the chimney, they lost half their population

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Why does Spiderman only have 11 months in his calendar Because he Lost May!!

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Why don’t orphans like to get lost?? Because somebody’s going to ask where their parents are. There was an American wrestler from Texas named John, who throughout his high school career had never lost a match. As he went on into college he continued undefeated. He became a national icon and symbol of American strength. News began to circulate of a Russian

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Why did Steven hawking die? He lost wifi connection and don’t get the data plan.

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“why did the Carthaginian say Rome lost the war? -because they were just roman around”

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what is a orphans favorite song. lost boy

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Yo mama so fat i stood next to her and lost cell phone reception

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You know a parana can devour a small child in 30 seconds Any way I lost my job at the aquarium today

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An orphan walks into a supermarket, gets lost calls for his mum then remembers

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Today was a bad day. First My ex got hit by a bus. Then I lost my job as a bus driver

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Yo mama’s so stupid, when I told her that she lost her mind, she went looking for it

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