Lost jokes

Today was the worst day ever! My brother got run over, and I lost my driver’s license!

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“why did the Carthaginian say Rome lost the war? -because they were just roman around”

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I lost my job at the bank on my very first day. – A woman asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.

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How do you know that the U.S. suck at chess/ They lost two towers.

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Why do Americans suck at chess… because they lost two towers Me: I have lost it. Random: Lost what? Me: My will to live.

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One night, I saw a woman sitting behind a dumpster. So I took her home. We talked all the way there. When we got home, I gave her a bath. Later on, things started getting passionate. We started doing intercourse, and some of the noises she made you would have thought she was still alive! My girlfriend dumped me, so I stole her wheelchair Guess who came crawling back

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