Nut jokes

A Pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel attached to his dick. The Bartender asks him why And the Pirate says: Argh, It’s driving me nuts.

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2 nuts were walking down the street, and one was a-salted! What’s A Squirrels Favourite OTT? Nut-Flix

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“hey what’s the russian president’s name?” “putin?” “yeah, putin deez nuts in yo mouth”

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When you throw your peanut butter sandwich at the nut allergy table 25+ kill streak

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There is a kid in my class who is allergic to peanuts. He says hes gay- he can’t be tho… he’s allergic to nuts!

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Ow! you hit the spot!

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How do you get a squirrel down from a tree? You pull down your pants and show it your nuts.

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you know bofa? bofa deez nuts

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What did the squirrel say to the dog? There are nuts in your poop. I found them. :(

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What do you call a nut on a Wheelchair?..a busted nut.

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DEEEZ NUTS

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I nutted on the wall, call that a walnut.

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Me: Do you like smash? Friend: Smash Rolls? Me: No, Smash DEEZ NUTS! Friend: AHHHHH (*moans)

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I have big balls said the kid holding to soccer balls

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Yo girl…do you like squirrels, because i’m about to nut in your hole

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