Nut jokes

ok this isnt a joke but its funny. Roses are red, nuts are brown, Skirts go up, pants go down. Body to body, skin to skin, when its stiff, stick it in. It goes in dry, comes out wet, the longer it’s in, the stronger it gets. It comes out dripping and starts to sag, its not what you think, its a lipton tea bag. Get your mind out of the gutter.

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What does a robot do at the end of a one night stand? – He nuts and bolts.

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A pirate walked into a bar with his ship’s steering wheel hanging off his pants. The bartender says, “Hey! What’s with the steering wheel? ” The pirate says, “I don’t know but it’s driving me nuts!”

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Ow! you hit the spot!

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What did one squirrel say to the other ‘‘do you have any nuts’’

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I have a pun, but I will nut-tella you!

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I bet for Halloween you were a Goblin. how a about you gobble DEEZ nuts.

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what do u call a nut in jail: a busted nut

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can i put deez nuts in yo cluts?

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Are you a walnut because I’m about to nut all over your walls!

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Hi ?? I was wondering

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A Pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel attached to his dick. The Bartender asks him why And the Pirate says: Argh, It’s driving me nuts.

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I have big balls said the kid holding to soccer balls

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I asked my doctor if it was normal for one of my nuts to be bigger than the other two.

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Why did the squirrel swim on his back? keep his nuts dry.

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