why did the hooker quit her job? she had a nut allergy
A GUY GOES TO SEE HIS PSYCHIATRIST DRESSED ONLY IN BUBBLE WRAP. WHEN HE GETS THERE HE ASKED THE PSYCH, cAN YOU PLEASE HELP ME? THE PSYCH SAYS NO, I’M SORRY, I CAN CLEARLY SEE YOUR NUTS. A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. “But why?” they asked, as they moved off. “Because”, he said, “I can’t stand chess-nuts boasting in an open foyer.”
A pirate walks into a bar and has a ship’s wheel in his pants. The bartender asks, “What’s with the wheel in your pants?” The pirate replies, “Yarrr! It’s drivin’ me nuts!”
Do you know wildee? What’s that? Willdeeznuts fit into your mouth
If you are what you eat, does that mean all squirrels are nuts?
Do you like Wendy’s? Yeah Wendy’s nuts finna go in your mouth
What do u call it when a boxer cums? Busting a nut
You heard that Michael Jackson autopsy reports showed he died of food poisoning? It’s because he ate some 8 year old nuts.
What did the nut chasing the other nut say? Imma cashew
do you like wendys? when deez nutz are in your mouth
sx
my best friend got ligma (ah did he, sorry bro) LIGMA BALLS
My puns drive people nuts, this is usually when I bolt away
I nutted on the wall, call that a walnut.
What did one nut say to the other? Ignore the guy in the middle. He’s a d!ck.
RUS | ENG
