Paint jokes

As I’m lying down on the table for a radiation treatment, a small angel lands on one shoulder, a tiny devil on the other shoulder. And then the mind game begins: Angel: This won’t last long. You are perfectly lined up. The treatment only lasts a few mins. Remember, stay absolutely still. Devil: Did she just twitch? A: No. She didn’t twitch. D: I think I saw her

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So I went to a church the other day and I asked my friend is that painting of Jesus and is it through the wall with one with three htm title=' not doing the T post that he invented'>nails Oh wait I wasn’t even Jesus he’s not doing the T post that he invented

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how many you throw.

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My young son saw trump on TV he asked “Why is the man on TV painted orange?” I replied “Son when Russia pays that much for equipment, They don’t want it to rust”

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1: hey 2:what 1:we’re outta paint 2:HMM (and thats how stop signs have extra paint.)

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A guy meets a sex worker in a bar. She says, ‘This is your lucky night. I’ve got a special game for you. I’ll do absolutely anything you want for ?300 as long as you can say it in three words.’ The guy replies, ‘Hey, why not?’ He pulls his wallet out of his pocket and lays ? 300 on the bar, and says slowly. ‘Paint…my….house.’

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? - Depends on how big they are and how hard you throw them.

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you’re so fat you probably apply sunscreen with a paint roller What’s the difference between Jesus and a painting of Jesus? A painting only takes one nail to be hanged.

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Hey what is the difference between a painting and a wife? Only the wife was hung up

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If the red house is on the left, and the blue house on the right, where is the white house? in Washington D.C.

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A boat carrying red paint ando a boat carrying blue paint crashed into each other. The crews were marooned

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little Johnny likes to play with toy guns little Johnny paints them black little Johnny went to a gun store little johnny made a big mess the cemitary people were getting paid.

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How many babies do you need to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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what do Bob Ross’s painting and the orphanage have in common. They’re both filled with happy little accidents…

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Kid starts shortcoming people in school, teacher asks “why are you doing that”. He responds, “I wanted to paint the walls red for Christmas”

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