Paint jokes

A father and a son were painting pictures together, the son and father were drawing the exact same thing to a T and the son said “what happened to your hand?” looking at the scar tissue near the father’s knuckle, the father replied with “you know what happened, you were there.” the son continues to deny this until they both finish their paintings - they’re exactly the same. The father passes out for a few hours and wakes up to find that there’s only one painting.

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Did you hear about the dead artist Too many strokes

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how do you confuse a blonde? paint yourself green and throw forks at her

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw em

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What did the two paintings say after a long battle? Lets call this one a draw

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How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them. your hairline looks like someone tried to erase it using microsoft paint

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How many babys does it take to paint a wall red. Depends how hard you can throw them.

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I asked my dad , Why did you paint rabbits on your bald head? He replied, Because I thought it would look like hares

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As I’m lying down on the table for a radiation treatment, a small angel lands on one shoulder, a tiny devil on the other shoulder. And then the mind game begins: Angel: This won’t last long. You are perfectly lined up. The treatment only lasts a few mins. Remember, stay absolutely still. Devil: Did she just twitch? A: No. She didn’t twitch. D: I think I saw her

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What was one cool thing about hitler he used to paint his thoughts on the wall with a gun

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Kid starts shortcoming people in school, teacher asks “why are you doing that”. He responds, “I wanted to paint the walls red for Christmas”

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How to decorate a wall: Strip of the paper and original plaster put on fresh plaster and wall paper paint it (if you want) Send a bill to North America and wait patiently for a reply

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall Depends how hatd you throw them

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i will never forget my little brothers last word rip. his last words: paint dosent taste good

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I when to the orphans to paint a picture of there parents so they can actually talk to them

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