Paint jokes

One Tuesday afternoon Little Jonny Decides he wants extra Homework So he went to his teacher and said,Hello can I have extra homework this week and the teacher replied with,Sure be at my house Friday afternoon to cut my lawn, Polish the counters,Scrub the Baseboards,Scrub and paint the walls! And johnny replied with,That’s not what I Ment but at least I’ll get paid! And The Teacher said, How about 200 each job? Johnny replied with,OK (Friday afternoon at her house After Johnny Does all the jobs he asked for his payment and the teacher laughed and said, You do know that Tuesday was April fools day right?

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Ex Of Johnnys: I have a question. Johnny:What? Ex Of Johnnys: Am I pretty? Johnny: Yes ofc jesus mad everbody wonderfully! Ex: Awhh! Johnny: But who ever made you was painting tomas the train while making your face.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? - Depends on how big they are and how hard you throw them.

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Kid starts shortcoming people in school, teacher asks “why are you doing that”. He responds, “I wanted to paint the walls red for Christmas”

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Well it depends how hard you can throw.

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Two kids walked into a bar, they were covered with blood. the bartender asked what happened. The youngest said “Well, we we’re trying to paint our basement but we threw the babies too hard”.

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How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them. your hairline looks like someone tried to erase it using microsoft paint

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whats the difference between a gay guy and a freezer? the freezer doesn’t fart when you pull the meat out what doe Michelangelo and Kurt Cobain have in common? they both used there brains to paint the the walls

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An artist is commissioned to create a painting celebrating Soviet-Polish friendship, to be called “Lenin in Poland.” When the painting is unveiled at the Kremlin, there is a gasp from the invited guests. The painting depicts Lenin’s wife naked in bed with Leon Trotsky. “But this is a travesty! Where is Lenin? ” Asks one of the guests. “Lenin is in Poland,” replies the painter.

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A guy meets a sex worker in a bar. She says, ‘This is your lucky night. I’ve got a special game for you. I’ll do absolutely anything you want for ?300 as long as you can say it in three words.’ The guy replies, ‘Hey, why not?’ He pulls his wallet out of his pocket and lays ? 300 on the bar, and says slowly. ‘Paint…my….house.’

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what do Bob Ross’s painting and the orphanage have in common. They’re both filled with happy little accidents…

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Always practice safe sex: paint an x on the sheep that kick.

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