"…This morning, I came out my front door to see my neighbor frantically trying to scrub off the word “PEDO” that had been spray-painted on his front window. “What’s been going on John? ”’ I asked. “f@cking kids,” came his mumbled reply. The dirty bastard!’
Dulux have created a new type of paint its called Sue grey it covers up everything.
What do Michaelangelo and Hitler have in common? They both used their brain to paint the ceiling
i will never forget my little brothers last word rip. his last words: paint dosent taste good
Why did the snail paint a big “S” on his car? Because he wanted people to say look at that S car go when he rolled by.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall? One, if you throw it hard enough.
What do Michelangelo and Kurt Cobain have in common? They both used their brains to paint the ceiling.
A guy meets a sex worker in a bar. She says, ‘This is your lucky night. I’ve got a special game for you. I’ll do absolutely anything you want for ?300 as long as you can say it in three words.’ The guy replies, ‘Hey, why not?’ He pulls his wallet out of his pocket and lays ? 300 on the bar, and says slowly. ‘Paint…my….house.’
little Johnny likes to play with toy guns little Johnny paints them black little Johnny went to a gun store little johnny made a big mess the cemitary people were getting paid.
A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do. “Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?” The blonde said, “How about 50 dollars?” The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man’s wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, “Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?” The man replied, “She should. She was standing on the porch.” A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money. “You’re finished already?” he asked. “Yes,” the blonde answered, "and I had paint left over, so I gave it two coats. "Impressed, the man reached in his pocket for the $50. “And by the way,” the blonde added, “that’s not a Porch, it’s a Ferrari.”
you’re so fat you probably apply sunscreen with a paint roller What’s the difference between Jesus and a painting of Jesus? A painting only takes one nail to be hanged.
Kid starts shortcoming people in school, teacher asks “why are you doing that”. He responds, “I wanted to paint the walls red for Christmas”
What do Painters and Prostitutes have in common? They’re both paid for a good finish…
I asked my dad , Why did you paint rabbits on your bald head? He replied, Because I thought it would look like hares
whats the difference between a gay guy and a freezer? the freezer doesn’t fart when you pull the meat out what doe Michelangelo and Kurt Cobain have in common? they both used there brains to paint the the walls
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