Paint jokes

What brand of paint Michael Jackson use to paint Neverland Ranch? Dutch Boy.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them. What’s so great about dead baby jokes? They never get old.

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One time I saw a manatee all spray painted to look like a tiger. Needless to say, the first thing I yelled was, “OH! THE HUMANATEE!”

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i will never forget my little brothers last word rip. his last words: paint dosent taste good

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Little Johnny was in class and the teacher said ok class whats behind my back she said its round and red and sally said ooh ooh its an apple and the teacher noo but i like where your going with this so now teacher said it is also used to make multipule things and sally said ooh ooh its a container of paint and the teacher said again noo but i like where your going with this and the teacher said its a ball of yarn as she pulled it out from behind her back then little johnny said ok my turn he said whats in my pocket its round and it has a head and the teacher said thats enough johnny now sit down and little johnny pulled the thing htm title=' but i like where your going with this'>out of his pocket and said its a nickle but i like where your going with this

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how do you confuse a blonde? paint yourself green and throw forks at her

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What’s the difference between school and prison. One is painted

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Wow paint can, you have such a colorful personality!

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An artist is commissioned to create a painting celebrating Soviet-Polish friendship, to be called “Lenin in Poland.” When the painting is unveiled at the Kremlin, there is a gasp from the invited guests. The painting depicts Lenin’s wife naked in bed with Leon Trotsky. “But this is a travesty! Where is Lenin? ” Asks one of the guests. “Lenin is in Poland,” replies the painter.

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How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them. your hairline looks like someone tried to erase it using microsoft paint

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw em

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As I’m lying down on the table for a radiation treatment, a small angel lands on one shoulder, a tiny devil on the other shoulder. And then the mind game begins: Angel: This won’t last long. You are perfectly lined up. The treatment only lasts a few mins. Remember, stay absolutely still. Devil: Did she just twitch? A: No. She didn’t twitch. D: I think I saw her

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r u a toaster? cuz i wanna take a bath wit u r u a knife? cuz u make me wanna kms r u a painting? cuz i hang u r u the flu? cuz u make me wanna hurl r u a newspaper? cuz u have new problems everyday r u the ground? cuz im six feet deep in u ;)

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What did the two paintings say after a long battle? Lets call this one a draw

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What do Michelangelo and Kurt Cobain have in common? They both used their brains to paint the ceiling.

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