How do trees get online? – They just log in.
What did the guy exclaim after inventing the shovel? It is ground breaking!
a mexican was doing a magic trick he said “uno, dos,” then disappeared without a trace
What do you call a nose without a body? – Nobody knows.
New Teslas don’t come with a new car smell they come with an Elon Musk
Thanks for explaining the word “many” to me, it means a lot.
I hate how funerals are always at 9 a.m. – I’m not really a mourning person.
How does a fish always know how much they weigh? – Because they have their own scales.
Why do cows have hooves instead of feet? – Because they lactose.
Have you ever tried eating a clock? It’s really time-consuming, especially if you go for seconds.
So what if I can’t spell Armageddon? It’s not the end of the world
I have many jokes about unemployed people, sadly none of them work.
How does Moses prepare his tea? – Hebrews it.
My boyfriend just broke up with me for talking about video games too much. what a stupid thing to Fallout 4.
Someone stole my toilet and the police have nothing to go on.
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