A kid has an older brother that’s a very popular lifeguard. He sees all of the people that talk to his brother but he’s fairly ignored. So one day he asks his brother why everyone likes him so much. His older brother says “well all you gotta do is stick a potato in your pocket”. So the next day the boy goes back to the pool and he has a potato in his pocket, but everyone is avoiding him even more now. At the end of the day he goes up to his brother and asks why it didn’t work, and his brother says “dumbass, you were supposed to put it in the front!”
Q:Why did Tigger stick his head in the toilet? A:To find Pooh!
A bus full of nuns die in a car crash and end up at the pearly gates where saint Peter greets them hello sisters welcome to heaven before you enter I must ask you all a question he asks the first nun have you ever touched a penis well she said just once with the tip of my little finger ok dip it in the holy water and you can enter he repeats the question to the second nun well she says I might of held one once ok says st Peter wash your hands in the holy water and you can enter just then there’s a commotion down the line one nun is trying to push in front of another st Peter says sister Susan there is no rush you will get in that’s fine she replys but if I have htm title=' before sister Mary sticks her arse in it.'>to gargle that stuff I want to get in before sister Mary sticks her arse in it.
I used to have a phobia of pogo-sticks. Those things always made me jump.
Whats long brown and sticky? A stick.
A man ate a glue stick. It tasted bad. He died.hahahahah
Q: What do u call a boomerang that are not coming back A: a stick
Jack and Molly are sitting in school one day. Molly is asleep when the teacher asks her a question, “Molly, who created Heaven and Earth?” Jack sees Molly is sleeping and quickly pokes her with a sharp pencil. “Jesus Christ almighty!” shouts Molly. “Correct,” says the teacher. The next day the teacher asks, “Molly, who created Heaven and Earth?” Molly is again asleep and is poked by Jack’s pencil. “Jesus Christ almighty!” she shouts. “Correct again,” says the teacher. The next day, for a 3rd time, Molly is asleep. This time the teacher asks her, “What did Eve say to Adam when she had so many children?” Jack pokes Molly with the pencil again, and this time Molly screams “If you stick that thing in me one more time I’m going to crack it in half!”
A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods. The bear turns to the rabbit and asks do you have any problems with shit sticking to your fur and the rabbit says no So the bear wipes his ass with the rabbit
The teacher asks her class “What is sex?” and Little Jonny stands up and says “sex is the temptation caused by the sensation when a boy sticks his location into a girl’s destination. Did you get my explanation or do you need a demonstration? ” and the teacher fainted.
What is the difference between peanut butter and a dead baby? One sticks to the roof of you mouth, while the other one doesn’t!
Why are blind people so good ad being a jedi? They are always swinging a stick
a conductor was conducting a song, at the end he through his conductor’s stick and killed someone, he was put to the electric chair but nothing happened, they asked why he didn’t die and he replied, “I’m a bad conductor” how do you start an Ethiopian rave? stick toast to the ceiling.
ok this isnt a joke but its funny. Roses are red, nuts are brown, Skirts go up, pants go down. Body to body, skin to skin, when its stiff, stick it in. It goes in dry, comes out wet, the longer it’s in, the stronger it gets. It comes out dripping and starts to sag, its not what you think, its a lipton tea bag. Get your mind out of the gutter.
fat man coming in the store waiter oh god not again :| fat man : hi i would like 3 fries and 19 burgers waiter : sorry sir you will get the owners store out of stock on food can i get you a salad instead? fat man : oh sorry but im the owner and i have alot of stocks the for he record you should get yourself a my order your skinny af gurl you trading to be a stick or something?
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