Straight jokes

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An old man gets the call from the IRS The man on the phone says, “we’ve noticed large sums of money coming in and going out of your account constantly and we gotta get this straight. Come in tomorrow and we’ll have a chat about this.” The old man thinks for a while and then decides he better get his lawyer to come with him. The next day the old man and his lawyer

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Ten Catholic priests all die in a bus accident. When they arrive at the pearly gates, St. Peter acknowledges them. He sees that they’re all priests and immediately says "If any of you are pedophiles, there’s no point waiting here. You might as well eff off straight to hell right now!” Nine of the priests turn around and begin to walk away. St. Peter calls after them, "AND TAKE THE DEAF BASTARD WITH YOU TOO!”

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We wrote letters to a kid with cancer. My letter read “its a bumpy road but soon u will have a straight path.” People didnt realize it was meant for his heart monitor.

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My brother caught Covid last month. First I knew about it was when he speed-dialled me at 3am and gasped, ‘I can’t breathe, I can’t breathe !’ I just told him straight: ‘Bro… you really need to work on your George Floyd jokes.’

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why cant gay people have hair lines? because its not straight.

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I went to school with a gay guy who was really smart, but he always got mad that he got straight A’s instead of getting all the D’s

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Why can North Korea draw a straight line? Because they’ve got a supreme ruler

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In Africa, it doesn’t matter if you’re gay, straight or bisexual. At the end of the day, it’s night.

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