Little Johnny walked into the bathroom while his dad was taking a dump. As soon as Little Johnny walked in his dad let out a big FART! Little Johnny said “WHAT WAS THAT?” His dad said “ That was the sound of the north wind. The next day his teacher asked the class “ What’s the direction of the north wind?” Little Johnny raised his hand. The teacher called on him and he said “TEACH IT’S MY DADDY’S BOOTY!”
Teacher: your bag is heavy what’s in there! Weird Kid: Magazines
what do you call a creepy IT teacher…a PDF file
Teacher tests Little Johnny, “OK, Johnny, create a sentence which starts with ‘I’.” Little Johnny confidently starts, “I is…” Teacher snaps, “No, Little Johnny. You must always say, ‘I am’. ” Little Johnny sighs, “Yes ma’am. ‘I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.’"
%%The teacher is asking you a question. Teacher: If your biggest dream came true, what would you be? Me: dead.
A teacher says to her class one day, "Whoever answers my next question, can go home." A boy throws his bag out the window. The teacher asks, “Who just threw that?” The boy says, “Me! I’m going home now.”
A teacher asked his students a math question. “You have one dollar. Your parents give you five dollars. How much money do you have?” After some thinking, about half the class raised their hands. The teacher called on a little girl in the front. “One dollar!” she said
Teacher: Johnny can you use a sentence with definitely in it Little Johnny: Do farts have lumps in them Teacher: of cause not Johnny Little Johnny: then I’ve definitely shat myself
What’s the difference between a teacher and a train? The teacher says, “Spit out your gum,” but a train says, “Chew chew!”
Why did Beethoven have trouble finding a music teacher? – Because his teacher was Haydn.
Teacher: where’s you homework? Student: at home… Teacher: what’s it doing there? Student: having a better time than me.
Head teacher talking about recent vandalism during school assembly: “And to those of you who wrote Mr. Smith’s telephone number on the door of the girl’s toilets, he would like to make it clear that the last digit is a 7 and not a 4.”
An old teacher asked her student, “If I say, ‘I am beautiful,’ which tense is that?” The student replied, “It is obviously past.”
Today in math class we had to do an activity where we had to flip coins. The teacher said that we had to flip some coins, remove all of the heads, count them, and put the rest of the coins back in the cup and repeat until we had no coins left. I’m not sure what we were supposed to get out of that activity, but I got 15 dead bodies.
Your forehead so big that the Teachers use it as a whiteboard
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