Ñàìîå ïîïóëÿðíîå 2 December

What is a fish’s?? favorite game?

Salmon Says!

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Game jokes
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A man boards a plane with six children of various ages.

After the plane takes off, a woman sitting sitting behind the man asks him, “are all of them yours?”

“No,” the man responds. “I work for a condom company and these are some of the customer complaints.”

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Woman jokes

What do you call a woman with one arm and one leg? Eileen

Doctor approaches a patient in Hospital and says “I have some good news and bad news" so the patient says “What is the bad news?” the Doctor replies “I have had to amputate both your legs” so the patent says “Well what is the good news? ” the Doctor replies "I have found someone to buy your slippers”…

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Dark Humor
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So three daughters were sitting in the same room as their mother, the first daughter asked why she was named Daisy. So the mother replies “Because when we were taking you out of the hospital, a daisy landed on your forehead.” The second daughter asked why she was named Rose. So the mother explained “Same as Daisy, when you we were taking you out of the hospital, a rose petal landed on your forehead.” The third daughter then said “ksvrjxbdkavdowbxksb” so the mother said “Shut Up Brick!”

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Family jokes
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What’s the difference between Micheal Jackson and a plastic bag

One’s made of plastic and dangerous for kids to play with, and the other carries groceries

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What’s the difference?
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Father and mother are making love in the bedroom. Mother is on top of father. Suddenly the son enters the bedroom. Everyone is embarrassed, of course.

The next morning, the mother takes the little boy aside and says, “I’ll tell you about what you saw yesterday, you know Dad has a big belly and that’s why mom sometimes sits on top of that belly to push it flat.”. Says that little boy: “But mama, that does not make any difference.” “Oh no?” the mom asks. “No,” says the little boy, “When you go to work, the neighbor comes, and she puts herself on her knees for Dad, and sheblows his belly up again!”

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What’s the difference?

Do nothing about people falling down the stairs, it will keep happening

Put razor blades on the stairs, it will be their last time falling down the stairs

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Stairs jokes
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My friend made this joke (so I’m going steal it) I’m surrounded by fat people, oh wait… it’s just one

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Waiting jokes
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What’s the difference between England’s football team and a tea bag?

The tea bag stays in the cup longer.

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What’s the difference?
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Why do i love a block? because i can fall off the stairs

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Stairs jokes
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What’s a depressed person’s least favorite type of cereal???

LIFE

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Life jokes

What do you call the American healthcare plan for poor people? Death.

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Poor jokes
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Did you know that Iceland is only one sea away from Ireland?

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Sea jokes
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How many children does it take to paint a wall?

Depends on how hard you throw.

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Paint jokes
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My friend:What are you doing Me:I?m making holy water My friend:How? Me:I?m boiling the hell out of it.

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Hell jokes
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My ex got into a bad accident recently. I told the doctors the wrong blood type. Now she will really know what rejection feels like

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Ex jokes

Hey guys! It’s Triple G you can give me more ideas on jokes, mainly Fish and Sea jokes as those are the jokes I specialise and only do best on the comment section below. Please do feel free to thumbs down and comment on improvements as well as thumbsing up and saying what you liked! :)

Au revouir, GGG

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Sea jokes
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What do you call a fake speedrunner?

Dream

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Dream jokes
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Me at the Oscars when i see Jada Pinkett Smith, me, I said: “G.I. Jane 2, more like G.I Jada 2, can’t wait to see it”

So will smith is laughing and then suddenly, Suddenly Will Smith walks up to me and punches me in the face

Me: "Ow, oh, wow. Will Smith just smacked the shit out of me.” My nigcka Smith goes: “KEEP MY WIFE’S NAME OUT OF YOUR f@ckING MOUTH! ” Me: “Maybe you should focus on keeping her friends out of hers”

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Woman jokes
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What game did Al-Qaeda Play With The Twin Towers On September 11th 2001? Jenga.

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Game jokes
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A Mexican bandit made a specialty of crossing the Rio Grande from time to time and robbing banks in Texas. The banks offered a reward for his capture, dead or alive, but offered a much larger award for the recovery of the stolen funds. An enterprising Texas Ranger decided to track him down. After a long and difficult search, he traced the bandit to

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Frozen
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