Самое популярное 29 May

What is a lion call as a baby cocota

What’s the difference between England and a tea bag? – The tea bag stays longer in a cup.

You realize your in a parodox,until you die,you’ll see yourself die,Murder,Suicide,Old Age,Etc Then your realize your dreaming,but you realize that you die in a dream you die irl

My grief counselor died the other day

He was so good at his job, i don’t even care.

What’s the easiest way to get straight As? Use a ruler.

I had an uncle who was a conductor. He wasn’t a symphony conductor, nor was he a street car conductor, nor was he a train conductor. He was struck by lightning.

So what if I can’t spell Armageddon? It’s not the end of the world

So a neutron went to a bar, he asked the bartender how much for a beer, the bartender said, " For you, NO charge."

A salesman rings the door bell and Little Johnny answers. Salesman: “Can I see your dad?” Johnny: “No, he’s in the shower.” Salesman: “What about your mother? Can I see her?” Johnny: “Nope. She’s in the shower, too.” Salesman: “Do you think they’ll be out soon?” Johnny: “Doubt it. When my dad asked me for the Vaseline, I gave him super glue instead.”

Asian pregnancy test: Stick a Rubik cube into vagina. Wait 30 seconds, if it’s solved then there’s a little Asian in there.

Doctor: you don’t have long to live. 10… Patient: ten what? ten years, ten months? Doctor: 9… 8… 7…

Friends are like trees, they fall over if you hit them with an ax.

There is a young man smoking and a woman in a wheelchair. The woman says “why is a young man like you smoking? ”. The man turns around and says “why the f@ck are you wearing trainers…”

Life is like giving head…it always sucks

Wood fired pizza how would pizza get a job now

Minecraft YouTube but I can sing Believer!

YouTube but I making a first video in YouTube.

And I record all the Minecraft Videos and a upload.

Ooohh! To try it and a upload. Ooohh!

I’ve been recorded to streaming, couple more sleeps to do the dreaming.

I finally get to the stronghold, and if you told me you told me you told me you told me.

Place some more ender eyes, and it’s time to big surprise.

I wish i could be as visible as my depression is.

My future is so bright, i need a flashlight to see where i’m going

What did the drummer call his 2 twin daughters?

Anna 1 Anna 2

Define abnormal life.

Waking up everyday living a sane life!

I liked my life when I first got it…later they said no because I didn’t have the receipt.

Why did hitler kill him self? His gas bill was to high

I was cooking eggs the other day. It was very EGGxiting, all though, I was EGGxaggerating, but, if you think that wasn’t funny to you, then your hard boiled, that’s all for today YOLKS, so I said before several cats starting fighting, that sht was a CATastrophe, these kittens were all like “You’ve gotta be KITTEN me.” Mean while, in the ocean, they just waved, SEA what I did there? You SHORE you didn’t? Oh, alright, that’s okay bud- I guess these ocean puns are too DEEP for you. No? Okay- but, you know why the skeleton was lonely, eh? Oh, cause he had NO BODY. Why didn’t the skeleton ask the girl out? He didn’t have the guts. What did the skeleton do to his gf? He BNED her. No? Alright. Those didn’t make you laugh? Maybe I should hit your funny bone.

My dad and cancer go into a fight never saw my dad after that

Dulux have created a new type of paint its called Sue grey it covers up everything.