Ñàìîå ïîïóëÿðíîå 29 April

How do Chinese people get their names? Their parent’s throw woks down the stairs and name their children after the sound it makes,

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Stairs jokes
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The other day, I donated my car keys, $1,000, and a passport to a homeless man. You could feel the happiness come from me after he holstered his suppressed shotgun.

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Poor jokes

One day the teacher asks a boy why can’t fish talk underwater. The Kid says " If I put your head underwater will you be able to talk.

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Teacher jokes
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Luca’s Mom & Dad Be throwing the kids into the Fountain in the city but there sea monster so if the went to jail for that the would be on death row anyways.??

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Sea jokes
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Why did the strawberry cry? – Because his mother was in a jam.

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Dark Humor
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A computer is a HARDware device. How come someone still feels it is MicroSOFT

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Computer jokes

A woman walks onto the Bus with his child. The driver says, "That’s the ugliest child I have seen!" The woman sits down and tells her neighbor. The neighbor replies, “Go say something back. Here, I’ll hold your monkey for you!”

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Transport jokes
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This Dwarf was being mean to me so I said “when you get home I hope Snow White kicks the shit out of you.”

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Hope jokes
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Why has Stephen hawking’s stopped playing hide and seek with his wife? Because she keeps using a metal detector

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Woman jokes
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Women are like blackjack. I’m trying for 21, but I always hit on 14.

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Hit jokes
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What did Earth say to the other planets? – “You guys have no life!”

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Life jokes

A man got in a bad car accident. He was at risk of losing his arm. The doctors had to perform complicated surgery on his arm. The man’s wife visited after the surgery. The doctor came up to her and said: "I have good news and bad news." The wife said: "What’s the good news? “We managed to save his arm. ” “What’s the bad news?” “We couldn’t save the rest of him.”

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Doctors jokes
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Why doesn’t the Sun go to college? – Because it has a million degrees.

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Puns jokes
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Nutted in my shoes, now my kids are taking a walk.

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Nut jokes
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I got a job at a library once, i got fired like an hour in because the library manager said that the cookbooks didn’t go into the women’s sports section.

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Job jokes
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Jack took jill up a hill to have a picknic but jack and jill got drunk they then jill unzipped jacks fly then said you know you want me to he said yes so she took off her dress and bra jack took his pants and shirt off to they both went in the well together and playd a game jacks candy stick in jills candy stick next jill was suking jacks candy stick while jack licked htm title=' sat on jacks candy stick while making out'>and sucked her candy stick then jill sat on jacks candy stick while making out

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Drunk jokes

What’s the difference between dark humor and morbid humor? Dark humor would be saying ten babies in one trashcan. Morbid humor would be saying one baby in ten trashcans

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What’s the difference?
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I entered 10 puns in a pun contest, hoping one would win, but no pun in ten did.

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Hope jokes
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The first trains were often derailed. They had a bad track record.

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Transport jokes
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An apple a day keeps the doctor away… Or at least it does if you throw it hard enough…???

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Doctors jokes
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Yo mama so fat, when she walked by the TV, I missed three episodes.

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Fat jokes
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