Ñàìîå ïîïóëÿðíîå 25 August
| Dark Humor |
What do friends and trees have in common? They both fall down when you hit them with an axe.
| Hit jokes |
| Poor jokes |
You know what relationships and life? They both come to an end
| Life jokes |
| Family jokes |
Do nothing about people falling down the stairs, it will keep happening
Put razor blades on the stairs, it will be their last time falling down the stairs
| Stairs jokes |
The last words my Dad spoke before he passed was, “Honey put down the knife we were only talking about getting a divorce.”
| Family jokes |
Why is Steven hawking going to hell not heaven? Because it’s a stair way to heaven not a ramp.
Q:What’s black and white and red all over A: a nun falling down the stairs
| Stairs jokes |
I never knew how to use a boomerang, until it hit me
| Hit jokes |
A guy went to the doctor and told him that whenever he drinks a cup of tea his eye hurts,the doctor brought him a cup and asked him to drink … when he finished the doctor told him: from now on take off the spoon.
| Doctors jokes |
Why do orphans eat cerial with water? Because their daddy still hasn’t come home with the milk
| Milk jokes |
So if the reason people used to hang women because they were seen as witches back in the day, if boys were to be hung would they be called wizards?
| Dark Humor |
I Googled “How to start a Wildfire”. I got 48,500 matches.
| Puns jokes |
| Sea jokes |
What’s the difference between a well-dressed man on a bicycle and a badly dressed man on a unicycle?
Attire.
| What’s the difference? |
| Fat jokes |
Myrtle Beach has a clear blue sky and sunny, a pleasant air to visit as a family. Don’t you think they are not evil creatures and do you think they have them? “No, there are no gost or evil creatures.” You can say that, but don’t be surprised when Gina Claw Scare comes for you, aka GCS for short. Gina Claw Scare was born in North Carolina in August 1991. She died in 2000. No, that’s not real. WRONG. Gina’s real name was Gina Clawien Scaren. Yes, that’s why her name is Gina Claw Scare. Why did she die? I know right? She died from a curse from her bad companions. We never knew their names. The curse sent her down a dark path, demons and hate comments from people on istagram, facebook and the worst jokes on the site.
Gina Claw Scare loved fire. Which means she was a pyromaniac. She would rise from the grave in which she was buried. Did what? Stop, for real this time! They buried her on a loan in the forest. That caught fire. “HARSH MAN!” I know right? She rises from that grave, she comes for the people who call her by name four times. Then she beat the drums and set your house on fire! A fire so harmful that you can feel hurt, friends. You can hear everyone’s screaming. And then become like her. Never say her name. NEVER
| Fire jokes |
Man: I know how to please a woman. Woman: Then please leave me alone, you ugly two-faced hypocrite.
Man: I want to give myself to you. Woman: Sorry, I don’t like ugly peasants.
Man: Your hair colour is fabulous. Woman: I hate your hair colour, though.
Man: You look like a dream. Woman: Then open your ugly eyes and stop sleeping, hypocrite!
Man: I can tell that you want me. Woman: Yes, I want you dead.
R.I.P
Man: Hey, baby, what’s your sign? Woman: F*** you, pedophile!
Man: Your body is like a temple. Woman: Sorry, there are no services for pedophiles.
Man: Is this seat empty? Woman: Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down, you little peasant.
Man: What’s it like being the most beautiful girl in the bar? Every other woman I see looks ugly. Bleuch! Woman: How dare you!
Man: Haven’t I seen you someplace before? Woman: Yeah, that’s why I don’t go there anymore. I saw you playing with boxes in the store room and saying “I AM KING OF THE WORLD!”
| Dream jokes |
My friend made this joke (so I’m going steal it) I’m surrounded by fat people, oh wait… it’s just one
| Waiting jokes |
| Frozen |
Why did the guitarist get fired as a carpenter? He was shredding the floor…
| Fire jokes |
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