Ñàìîå ïîïóëÿðíîå 28 April

Why do trees never call emo kids?

The emos always hang up on them.

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Dark Humor
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I hated church growing up as a child, it was always standing, kneeling, sitting, standing, kneeling, sitting. I wish the priest would just pick a position and f*** me!

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Priest jokes

I am still trying to figure out why paying the covid doctors a complement is so offensive. They even kicked me out and all I said was to stay positive…

An apple a day can do so much more than keep the doctor away… it can keep ANYONE away.

If you throw it hard enough.

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Doctors jokes
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What’s a depressed person’s least favorite type of cereal???

LIFE

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Life jokes
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What do you call a bear without teeth? A gummy bear hahaha

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Family jokes
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Boys: “Hey, can billy come out and play baseball?” Mom: “That’s not funny, you know billy doesn’t have any arms and legs” Boys: “I know, we need a third base”

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Dark Humor

Kidnapping is just surprise adoption, congrats! You are now all my children! Just hop into the portal that leads to the Lust ring in hell-

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Hell jokes
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Did you hear the scores of the African basketball game?

It was Eight-Nothing

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Game jokes
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When does a joke become a dad joke?

When it Leaves and never comes back

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Family jokes
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Whats The Difference Between A Rabi And A Priest One Cuts Them Off And One Sucks Them Off

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Priest jokes
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Is that a quirked-up white boi with a little bit of swag, busting it down sexual style?

Is HE goated with the sauce?

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Dream jokes

A man was walking down the street with a swivel chair under one arm, a computer under the other and a desk strapped to his back. A policeman ran over to him and handcuffed him, saying “I’m arresting you for impersonating an office, sir”

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Computer jokes
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Fruit is like ex-wives.

They both look really good hanging from a tree.

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Ex jokes
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Last Night I had a dream I was swimming in lemonade… turns out I peed the bed.

What’s a spider-man’s dream job? Web developer

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Job jokes
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Whats the difference between a blonde and a car door: the harder you slam the blonde the looser it gets

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What’s the difference?
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How is smoking similar to oral sex? The closer to the butt you get the stronger the flavor!??

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Smoking jokes

I wanted to learn how to drive a stick shift, but I couldn’t find a manual.

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Stick jokes
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Yo mama so fat, she needed cheat codes for WII FIT!

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Fat jokes
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Yo mama so fat, when she walked by the TV, I missed three episodes.

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Fat jokes
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Why should old womon never eat sea food?

Cuz then she’ll start acting crabby.

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Sea jokes
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Q: If Adolf Hitler was a sea creature which would he be? A: Adlof-in

What does Osama bin Laden have in common with Spongebob?

Both can be found at the bottom of the sea, filled full of holes.

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Sea jokes
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