Ñàìîå ïîïóëÿðíîå 11 May

What do you call a girl with an hourglass figure? – A waist of time.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
Puns jokes
* * *

Yo mama so fat that when i banged her in the jacuzzi there was a level 8 tsunami

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
Fat jokes
* * *

Doctor: you’ll be at peace soon, sir. Me: what am I dying? Doctor: no your wife is.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
Doctors jokes

Friends are like trees, they fall over if you hit them with an ax.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
Hit jokes
* * *

A surgeon loses his job as he botched a surgery

Boss: “we have to let you go.”

Surgeon: “I protest innocence.”

Boss: “how?”

Surgeon: “I thought to do your job and saving people’s lives were two different things. ”

Boss: “get out”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
Job jokes
* * *

I went out with this girl the other night, she wore this real slinky number. She especially looked great going down the stairs.

What goes up stairs but doesnt move, stairs! laugh now!

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
Stairs jokes
* * *

Define abnormal life.

Waking up everyday living a sane life!

I liked my life when I first got it…later they said no because I didn’t have the receipt.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
Life jokes

Why couldn’t the dairy farmer find his home? He lost the whey!??

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
Milk jokes
* * *

This joke is so funny I’ll bet you greened (grined)

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
Green jokes
* * *

“Sanderson, fire a warning shot.”

“Uhh sir, this is an M32 rotary grenade launcher.”

“Ah potato-potato, just pull the trigger.”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
Fire jokes
* * *

The more suicidal people there are the less suicidal people there are

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
Dark Humor
* * *

When does a joke become a dad joke?

When it Leaves and never comes back

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
Family jokes

Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone

He got ran over by a bus

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
Transport jokes
* * *

Who is the only person time waits for? Nun.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
Waiting jokes
* * *

What did the rope and the tree say to the kid

Do you want to hang later

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
Dark Humor
* * *

Poor Bubba got burnt up so bad in a house fire that the coroner needed someone to identify the body. So Bubbas two best friends the three were inseparable agreed… The first friend said hard to tell can you turn him over the coroner look perplexed but did so nope that’s not Bubba. The second friend said he’s burnt up pretty bad can you roll him over again the coroner didn’t understand but rolled him over anyway, nope that’s not him. Pretty confused the coroner asked how can you tell its not him by rolling him over? well you see Bubba had two assholes, Impossible the coroner replied. The friends said I don’t know but everytime we went to town everyone would say here comes Bubba with them to assholes.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
Poor jokes
* * *

Ten Catholic priests all die in a bus accident. When they arrive at the pearly gates, St. Peter acknowledges them. He sees that they’re all priests and immediately says "If any of you are pedophiles, there’s no point waiting here. You might as well eff off straight to hell right now!” Nine of the priests turn around and begin to walk away. St. Peter calls after them, "AND TAKE THE DEAF BASTARD WITH YOU TOO!”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
Waiting jokes

I bought a rainbow gun but for some reason it doesn’t shoot straight

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
Straight jokes
* * *

I was watching my daughter play at the park, a woman came up to me and asked which one was mine, I said I was still choosing.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
Woman jokes
* * *

Your so poor, when a robber robs your house, they feel bad for you and just leave.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
Poor jokes
* * *

Why didnt the cows eat the lemon grass.

It made sour milk.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
Milk jokes
* * *

So i was sitting with my little brother and talk about our dreams. “What do you wanna be when you grow up?” I asked him. He answered “A doctor!”. I wanted to tease him so i said “I wouldn’t be treated by a doctor like you”. I was hoping he would get mad or something but instead, he calmly replied “Brother, i said doctor. Not a vet”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
Hope jokes
* * *
- up - << N E X T! >> random

© àíåêäîòîâ.net, 1997 - 2026