Самое популярное 18 October

Your mama so fat when Santa saw her he said ho ho holy S***

I like my woman like i like my coffee in a big sack on top of donkey

What’s the difference between a potted plant and your wife?

The first is easier to bury.

You know why I don’t buy Velcro items anymore?

They are a total rip off.

Why cant emos come out of the closet to their parents? because they wont be there to stick around

Me, trying to interact with people: “Hey, are you a rope? Because I really wanna HANG with you”

Person I’m talking to: Pulling out phone to call suicide hotline “haha what”

I know five fat people and you’re three of them

What do you call a red neck on fire. A fire cracker

A girl walked into a job interview. The interviewer said “you are what we are looking for, but i need to test your skills. ” he hands her a pen He said “sell me this pen” She puts in between her boobs.

Whats the similarities between an emo and some Christmas lights

They are both going to be hanging from a tree

My mom said she will slam me head into my computer of I don’t get of it, I’m not to worried though, I think she is just jhehus,d.kes,jdhcuya71,hshh.jdh

What do you call Steven Hawkins on fire

Hot wheels

Jim walks into a bar and asks for a shot of vodka. He then says to the barkeep, “Who’s the toughest guy in here?” The barkeep points to a man at the pool table. Jim then knocked him out and paid for the shot and left. He did this every Friday for 2 months. Finally, the barkeep is pissed because Jim keeps knocking out all of his customers. He then orders a gorilla and puts him in the bathroom. Jim walks into the bar and gets another shot of vodka. He asks again, “Who’s the toughest guy in here tonight?” The bartender points to the bathroom and says he’s in there. Jim walks into the bathroom and everyone in the bar can hear yelling and screaming. The bartender asks, “What happened in there?” Jim smiles and says, “I don’t know who that was, but when he wakes up tell him I put his fur jacket int the toilet.”

I go into get a prostate exam, I’m nervous but the doctor says its all natural and needs to be done.

So he pulls down my pants and sticks one finger up my ass. I feel it go deeper inside, feeling for abnormalities.

That’s when I realize his hands are on my shoulders.

This Dwarf was being mean to me so I said “when you get home I hope Snow White kicks the shit out of you.”

Have you heard of the new sequel to “the exorcist”?

A woman hires the devil to get a priest out of her son

Fruit is like ex-wives.

They both look really good hanging from a tree.

You wanna know what’s the difference between a girl and a refrigerator? “a refrigerator doesn’t moan when I put my meat in it”

So a guy walks into a bar and asks for a drink, the bartender says “I’ll give you a drink if you can tell me a meta joke” so the guy says “alreight so a guy walks into a bar and asks for a drink” the bartender says “I’ll give you a drink if you can tell me a meta joke” so the guy says “ so a guy walks into a bar and asks for a drink” the bartender says”I’ll give you a drink if you can tell me a meta joke” so the guy says” so a guy walks into a bar and asks for a drink” the bartender says” ok here you go” so he gives the guy a drink, so he gives the guy a drink, so he gives the guy a drink

The emo kid tried to high five the tree But the tree left him hanging

Q:What did one koala say to the other? A:Hows it hanging.??

So my friends birthday was coming up, so I got him a new box to live in.