Самое популярное 1 December

Yo dad’s so stupid he came back after he got the milk.

One time their was a depressed man standing in the middle of a train track a girl said excuse me can you move please I’m trying than the man stopped her sentence htm title=' than she said back easy hung it up'>and said how is your t shirt so clean than she said back easy hung it up

Fun fact! You can hold your breath till the rest of your life

What’s green and smells like pork? Kermit’s finger

Where do sick boats go? – The dock!

There is a man in the hospital the power went out and the man was stabbed to death, there are three witnesses, the nurse who was with another patient, the doctor who was reading some paperwork, and The Who was at the vending machine, who killed the man? The mom did because you can’t use a vending machine when the powers out!

My grandfather said we rely on technology too much so I unplugged his life support. Luckily I remember his last words. “You little bastard!”

If you drop an emo and a piece of paper from a tree which will hit the ground first?

The piece of oaper because the rope will stop the emo

A man goes for his annual checkup. Afterwords he’s sitting the the doctor’s office and the doctor comes in with the results of his tests. The doctor says, “I have some bad news; you have cancer and Alzheimer’s. ” The man replies, “well, at least I don’t have cancer.”

So a guy walks into a bar and asks for a drink, the bartender says “I’ll give you a drink if you can tell me a meta joke” so the guy says “alreight so a guy walks into a bar and asks for a drink” the bartender says “I’ll give you a drink if you can tell me a meta joke” so the guy says “ so a guy walks into a bar and asks for a drink” the bartender says”I’ll give you a drink if you can tell me a meta joke” so the guy says” so a guy walks into a bar and asks for a drink” the bartender says” ok here you go” so he gives the guy a drink, so he gives the guy a drink, so he gives the guy a drink

What do you call a magician who has lost their magic?

Ian.

Today; Worst day ever

My annoying sibling got hit by a train and I lost my job as a conductor.

What’s the difference between a priest and acne? At least acne waits til the boy is 12 to come on his face.

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson decide to go on a camping trip. After dinner and a bottle of wine, they lay down for the night, and go to sleep.

Some hours later, Holmes awoke and nudged his faithful friend.

“Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see.”

Watson replied, “I see millions of stars.”

“What does that tell you?”

Watson pondered for a minute.

“Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets.” “Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo.” “Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three.” “Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful and that we are small and insignificant.” “Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow.” “What does it tell you, Holmes?”

Holmes was silent for a minute, then spoke: “Watson, you idiot. Someone has stolen our tent!”

The other day, I donated my car keys, $1,000, and a passport to a homeless man. You could feel the happiness come from me after he holstered his suppressed shotgun.

Pp almighty stabeth thy! Then my sister said just put it in.

Hey guys! It’s Triple G you can give me more ideas on jokes, mainly Fish and Sea jokes as those are the jokes I specialise and only do best on the comment section below. Please do feel free to thumbs down and comment on improvements as well as thumbsing up and saying what you liked! :)

Au revouir, GGG

What does a cannibal and a spider have in common? Both eight legs

I’ve sadly received a rejection letter from NASA. Strangely, it says there’s no space on their training programme.

Why is Steven hawking going to hell not heaven? Because it’s a stair way to heaven not a ramp.

Q:What’s black and white and red all over A: a nun falling down the stairs

Have you ever tried eating a clock? It’s really time-consuming, especially if you go for seconds.

Words that have ho in them:

Thot Whore Asshole Horrible Horena (my ex gf)