Ñàìîå ïîïóëÿðíîå 5 June

Asian man goes to the eye doctor. Doctor says, “It looks like you have a cataract.” Asian guy says, “No Doc, I drive a Rincoln.”

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Doctors jokes
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This isnt an orphan joke but. I got a job at a library, but it only lasted 15 minutes. Turns out, books about women’s rights shouldn’t go in the Sci-Fi / Fantasy section.

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Job jokes

The other day a squirrel asked me for a job, I asked him what jobs did you have previously. Calmly he answered," I am a pilot, I can pick it up from here and pile it over there, I also can fly a sign!!!" " To bad, this is a nut cannery, and we’re 100% automated, we don’t need anyone at this time, sorry." " No worries, I’m totally nuts anyway, guess I’ll fly a sign across town, don’t have bus fare!!!"

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Transport jokes
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Nutted in my shoes, now my kids are taking a walk.

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Nut jokes
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How does a crazy person get to the woods?

He takes the psychopath.

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Puns jokes
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A computer is a HARDware device. How come someone still feels it is MicroSOFT

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Computer jokes

Being sad is my only happiness

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Dark Humor
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Whats the hardest part when making skimmed milk? throwing the cow across the lake

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Milk jokes
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I love the smell of my F5 key. – It’s very refreshing.

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Computer jokes
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A Muslim is about to commit suicide when a Catholic priest stops him “What are you doing?!” Exclaims the priest

“There is nothing on this Earth for me.” The Muslim says “I will commit suicide to go to paradise and get 72 virgins!”

The priest shakes his head

“Foolish Muslim, suicide is not the way! ” He says

“Follow me, Ill take you to the local primary school.”

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Priest jokes
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My dad said ill get the milk but he forgot i was i his car

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Dark Humor

Jim walks into a bar and asks for a shot of vodka. He then says to the barkeep, “Who’s the toughest guy in here?” The barkeep points to a man at the pool table. Jim then knocked him out and paid for the shot and left. He did this every Friday for 2 months. Finally, the barkeep is pissed because Jim keeps knocking out all of his customers. He then orders a gorilla and puts him in the bathroom. Jim walks into the bar and gets another shot of vodka. He asks again, “Who’s the toughest guy in here tonight?” The bartender points to the bathroom and says he’s in there. Jim walks into the bathroom and everyone in the bar can hear yelling and screaming. The bartender asks, “What happened in there?” Jim smiles and says, “I don’t know who that was, but when he wakes up tell him I put his fur jacket int the toilet.”

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Bar jokes
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Yo mama so fat that when i banged her in the jacuzzi there was a level 8 tsunami

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Fat jokes
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People are like potatoes.

We may look different, but we all taste the same with a little ketchup.

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What’s the difference?
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Why did stephen hawkins die

He lost internet connections

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Lost jokes
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Wait isnt this sans job to make a joke?

Ur so ugly that when u came out of the hunted house u had a job offer

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Job jokes

What do you call it when a midget waves at you? A microwave

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Puns jokes
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Kid:what is between moms legs? Dad:paridise. Kid whats between you legs? Dad:the key to paridise. Kid:well uou better change the lock the neighbor has the key to.

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Family jokes
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You must be depression, because you make me want to kill myself ;)

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Dark Humor
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Why Didnt The Skeleton Go To Prom?

He Was Dead. You Fool. You Fell For My Trick. Im Very Heartless-

Oh Wait

YOU FOOL-

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Waiting jokes
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I’ve decided to marry a pencil. I can’t wait to introduce my parents to my bride 2B.

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Waiting jokes
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