The other day a squirrel asked me for a job, I asked him what jobs did you have previously. Calmly he answered," I am a pilot, I can pick it up from here and pile it over there, I also can fly a sign!!!" " To bad, this is a nut cannery, and we’re 100% automated, we don’t need anyone at this time, sorry." " No worries, I’m totally nuts anyway, guess I’ll fly a sign across town, don’t have bus fare!!!"
Jim and Allyn are 2 mates in the Air Force. They were paired up for a training exersice. They got up into the air and Jim said, “okay Allyn, your helmet can control the missile when launched from the jet. Go ahead and test fire a missile and aim it at anything you want.” Allyn fired the missile and had his eyes set on an abandoned building. Jim then said, “I also forgot, watch out for friendly fire.” Allyn said “what?” As he looked over at Jim.
why are dolphins so smart? Because within three hours they can train a human to stand at the edge of the pool and feed them fish!
The first trains were often derailed. They had a bad track record.
imagine u go to school right u hit the curve the bus driver be like ahhh how do i stop the bus students from the bus jump from the windows one of the students THAT’S a U Problem
What do you call a freight train with bubble gum? A chew chew train!
i like trains train hits him
You mama is like train tracks she gets laid all around the country
East Richmond has a train station at East Richmond but Richmond is better why
Why did the cloud apply to stormtrooper training school? He mist.
what is yellow and cant swim? A bus full of kids.
What is yellow and can’t swim A school bus full of children
I’ll never forget my father’s last words… Oh f@ck, it’s a bus!
Why couldn’t Sally write with the pen? (Friend: Idk, why?) Because she had no arms. Why couldn’t Sally play Tennis? (Friend: Because she had no arms?) Yes, she had no arms. Why did Sally fall off the swing? (Friend: Because she had no arms?) No, Joe pushed her. Why couldn’t Sally pick up the box? (Friend: Some weird guess) Because she had no arms. Why did sally drop her ice cream? (Friend: Because she had no arms? ) Because she got hit by a bus. Knock Knock. (Friend: Who’s there?) Not Sally.
I had an uncle who was a conductor. He wasn’t a symphony conductor, nor was he a street car conductor, nor was he a train conductor. He was struck by lightning.
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