There were 15 ugly guys on a bus. The bus crashed and they all went to heaven. God took pity on them and told the ugly dudes they could have one wish. The first guy said,"I want to be handsome. " God granted his wish. The second guy said,“I want to be more handsome than the first guy.”, God granted his wish. “The third guy said " I want to be more handsome than the second guy.” God granted his wish and this continued on and on until the 15 ugly guy.The ugly guy was laughing. Really hard. “What is your wish? ” God asked him. “I WANT ALL THESE GUYS UGLY AGAIN!!!” God granted his wish
Two guys where on a hunting trip and after the first day of hunting they don’t see anything so that decide the next day they will split up and meet back at, the fire at dinner time. After a day of hunting they meet back at the fire and the one hunter asked the other how did your day go? So the one hunter said “I had the best day ever,” I went down the hill and hunted by the train tracks and saw the hottest chick ever, we had sex for hours in every position you could think of. Then the other hunter asked him “was she a good lookin blond? ” And he said “ oh I don’t know I didn’t find her head”
I was talking to a close friend that was Islamic. He said he was being shipped to an amazing training. I asked “where are you going” He said “Camp Bin Laden” I asked “what do they do there” He answered “they got bomb training and hand to hand combat training. Plus the got arts and crafts.” I asked “what do you mean by arts and crafts? ” He said “see this towel on my head” I nodded “I made it out of boxer jokes”
Why didn’t Sally get home from work. She got hit by a bus
When they where going around giving out brains and U thought they where saying train so u said no thanx I’ll take the next one ????
I’ll never forget my father’s last words… Oh f@ck, it’s a bus!
Why did little billy drop his ice cream cone? Cuz he got hit by a bus while crossing the street.
Three guy are in the woods, a a really smart guy, an average, and a really dumb guy, they bored so the smart guy decides to go hunting a little while later he comes back with a dear, the average guy asks how do did you do that? The really smart guy says says I see dear tracks I fallow dear tracks, I see dear I shoot dear. The average guy say I think I understand and leaves, an little bit later he comes back with a raccoon. The really dumb goes gasp how did you do that!?. And the average looks at him funny and says well I see raccoon tracks I fallow raccoon tracks, I see raccoon I shoot raccoon. The super dumb guy thinks for a second and says Oooohh, ok I thiNo I can do that… and leaves. Hours pass and and the guy finally returns, hurt, bloody, and horribly mingled. They run to help him. Finally one of the guys ask him what happened this is what he said: I see train tracks, I fallow train tracks. I see train I shoot train. But train keep coming.
i like trains train hits him
What’s the difference between a dirty bus station and a lobster with breast implants? One is a crusty bus station, and the other is a busty crustation
Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone He got ran over by a bus
there was a kid at school he was reading a book and he came across a phrase it was purple pation he went to his teacher and asked what it ment his teacher said hat the actual hell get the hell out of my class and go to the princible offic the princible said its ok iwas probably a mistake i will clean this all up in the mean time whats the phrase he says purple pation his prncible stares at him for about 3 seconds then says get the hell out of my school u r expelled he ran 7 miles to his dads offic crying all the way he went to his dad and explained how hs teacher kicked him out of the class and the princable expelled him his dad said calm down i will clean this all up and he said thats what the princable said he said i will clean it up he said ok the phrase is purple pation hisdad said i hate u getout of myoffice i dont want to see u again he ran down crying to his house he explained what happened his mom said the same thing as everyone else so he explaines the phrase his moms kickes him out of the house and he ran down to the park crying a old lady said whats wrong he explained whats happening then she says wellwhats the phrase he says purplepation the old lady said see that house across the street thats my house come over in about 30 min and i will explain he says thank u it was the longest 30 min htm title=' gets hit by a bus sorry guys ;)'>of his life he sprints across the street and gets hit by a bus sorry guys ;)
what do u call a train that carries bubblegum? Chew-chew train! heeheee
Charizarding When you light a girls pubes on fire, put it out with your jizz then flap your arms and say “You don’t have have enough badges to train me”
A man gets on a bus, and ends up sitting next to a very attractive nun. Enamored with her, he asks if he can have sex with her. Naturally, she says no, and gets off the bus. The man goes to the bus driver and asks him if he knows of a way for him to have sex with the nun. “Well,” says the bus driver, “every night at 8 o’clock, she goes to the cemetery to pray. If you dress up as God, I’m sure you could convince her to have sex with you.” The man decides to try it, and dresses up in his best God costume. At eight, he sees the nun and appears before her. “Oh, God!” she exclaims. “Take me with you!” The man tells the nun that she must first have sex with him to prove her loyalty. The nun says yes, but tells him she prefers anal sex. Before you know it, they’re getting down to it, having nasty, grunty, loud sex. After it’s over, the man pulls off his God disguise. “Ha, ha! I’m the man from the bus! ” “Ha, ha!” says the nun, removing her costume. “I’m the bus driver!”
RUS | ENG
