Transport jokes

The first trains were often derailed. They had a bad track record.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

what is yellow and cant swim? A bus full of kids.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2


-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Why did Little Sally drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Why did they make bus stops? So the bus driver would know where to pick the orphan up.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

I want to die in my sleep, like grandpa did, not screaming and crying like the people on the bus he drove.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2


A robber breaks into a house while the residents are away one dark night. Eager to see what he can loot, he quickly starts searching through cupboards and dressers, grabbing valuables with a trained eye. Suddenly, he hears a voice come out of nowhere. “Jesus is watching you.” The criminal jumps, scared the residents are back, and freezes. After a few minutes of silence however, he assumes it was his imagination, and goes back to robbing. A couple minutes pass, before once again, the voice returns. “Jesus is watching you.” Quite confused, the thief searches the house and checks the front door, but nothing pops out as unusual. He finally decides to move rooms, and finds a parrot, but ignores it. Before he can begin to do anything, someone speaks again, “Jesus is watching you.” The robber realized it was the parrot talking! Going to the parrot, he asks it, “Are you the one who’s been talking to me?” The parrot responds, “Yes.” The thief couldn’t believe it. So, he asks another question. “What is your name?” “Ismael.” the parrot replies. The man scoffed. “What type of idiot names a parrot Ismael?” The parrot speaks yet again, “The same type of idiot that names a Rottweiler Jesus.”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Why did the pirate kids ride the short bus to school? Because they were retarrrrrrrrrded Tonight, on top gear! James may dives a bus full of kids off a mountain! Richard Hammond starts WW3 in Germany! and I fly a plane into the World Trade Center!

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What’s white and annoying at breakfast? An avalanche. Why did little Suzy fall off the swing? She got hit by an axe. Why did little Billy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus. How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Little Johnny was playing with his train and said all you motherfckers who want to get off get off and all you motherfckers who want to get on get on his mother here’s him and said is that you cussing. The mother said go to your room for 1 hour little Johnny goes to his room then little johnny comes back one hour later and said all you motherfckers who wanna get off get off and all you motherfckers who wanna get on get on and if you wanna know about the 1 hour delay go ask the b*tch in the kitchen.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *


© àíåêäîòîâ.net, 1997 - 2026