Chuck Norris gets paid 2m dollars a month training Bear Grylls how to survive in the “harshest conditions on earth”
What’s the difference between a teacher and a train? The teacher says, “Spit out your gum,” but a train says, “Chew chew!”
I need a hug hugs train
To become a licensed, airline pilot requires 1,500 hours (two years) of training. But it only takes 10 seconds to steal the pilot’s jacket and hat.
3 blonde were walking on a path, the first blonde said, “Hey look there are deer tracks!” The second blonde said, “No way those are totally duck tracks, ” The third blonde said, “Nuh uh those are” then they got hit by a train.
Charizarding When you light a girls pubes on fire, put it out with your jizz then flap your arms and say “You don’t have have enough badges to train me”
What’s white and annoying at breakfast? An avalanche. Why did little Suzy fall off the swing? She got hit by an axe. Why did little Billy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus. How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.
So I was going out the door and I see me dwarf neighbour at the bus stop, I ask if he needs a lift. He replies with fu… off. So I zip up my backpack and keep going to work
what do you call a train with buble gum? a chew chew train oh man im depressed
imagine u go to school right u hit the curve the bus driver be like ahhh how do i stop the bus students from the bus jump from the windows one of the students THAT’S a U Problem
Whats the difference between me and a bus? Im not on fire…
Say what you want about Hitler at least he got the trains to run on time
Why couldn’t Sally write with the pen? (Friend: Idk, why?) Because she had no arms. Why couldn’t Sally play Tennis? (Friend: Because she had no arms?) Yes, she had no arms. Why did Sally fall off the swing? (Friend: Because she had no arms?) No, Joe pushed her. Why couldn’t Sally pick up the box? (Friend: Some weird guess) Because she had no arms. Why did sally drop her ice cream? (Friend: Because she had no arms? ) Because she got hit by a bus. Knock Knock. (Friend: Who’s there?) Not Sally.
Two boys are talking on the bus Boy 1: I feel like i’m forgetting something. Boy 2: hey did you hear about that school shooting last week? Boy 1: oh that’s right
Why did sally fall off the swing? Because she was hit by a bus.
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