Transport jokes

Whats yellow and cant swim but screams when it goes under. A school bus full of kids

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What do you call a train that likes toffee? A chew-chew train

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What’s the difference between an ISIS training center and a school?? I don’t know, I just fly the drone

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What do need in order to crash a train? A bad track record

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Do you know a funny bus driver? I do

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what do you call a train with buble gum? a chew chew train oh man im depressed

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A bus full of nuns die in a car crash and end up at the pearly gates where saint Peter greets them hello sisters welcome to heaven before you enter I must ask you all a question he asks the first nun have you ever touched a penis well she said just once with the tip of my little finger ok dip it in the holy water and you can enter he repeats the question to the second nun well she says I might of held one once ok says st Peter wash your hands in the holy water and you can enter just then there’s a commotion down the line one nun is trying to push in front of another st Peter says sister Susan there is no rush you will get in that’s fine she replys but if I have htm title=' before sister Mary sticks her arse in it.'>to gargle that stuff I want to get in before sister Mary sticks her arse in it.

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What do you call a train that stalls? The little engine that couldn’t!

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A man shot into a crowd at the train station and didn’t hit one person, when the police asked why he missed, someone said cause he gay. He couldn’t shoot straight

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What’s big and yellow and can’t swim, a bus filled with children

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Three guy are in the woods, a a really smart guy, an average, and a really dumb guy, they bored so the smart guy decides to go hunting a little while later he comes back with a dear, the average guy asks how do did you do that? The really smart guy says says I see dear tracks I fallow dear tracks, I see dear I shoot dear. The average guy say I think I understand and leaves, an little bit later he comes back with a raccoon. The really dumb goes gasp how did you do that!?. And the average looks at him funny and says well I see raccoon tracks I fallow raccoon tracks, I see raccoon I shoot raccoon. The super dumb guy thinks for a second and says Oooohh, ok I thiNo I can do that… and leaves. Hours pass and and the guy finally returns, hurt, bloody, and horribly mingled. They run to help him. Finally one of the guys ask him what happened this is what he said: I see train tracks, I fallow train tracks. I see train I shoot train. But train keep coming.

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What is the difference between an ISIS training camp and a school? Don’t ask me, i just fly the drone.

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why are dolphins so smart? Because within three hours they can train a human to stand at the edge of the pool and feed them fish!

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Why did Sally drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock knock. Who’s there? Not Sally whats yellow and cant swim a bus full of toddlers

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%% %%A train walks into a bar. It says to the barkeeper, “I’ll have a gallon of ale.” “A gallon?” the barkeeper asks. “Yes,” replies the train, “I always end up chugging it.”

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