What a day yesterday was I got a promotion and my sisters killer was hit by a bus now I’m in a cast!
why are dolphins so smart? Because within three hours they can train a human to stand at the edge of the pool and feed them fish!
What’s big and yellow and can’t swim, a bus filled with children
Today; Worst day ever My annoying sibling got hit by a train and I lost my job as a conductor.
Little Johnny got a train set for Christmas. He takes it around the circle, parks it at the station, and says” alright, you motherf@ckers get off here, and you motherf@ckers get off here” his mom comes rushing in and says” little Johnny, we don’t use that kind of language, go to your room and think about what you did!” After a few hours, she lets him out of his room. He goes back to play with his train set. He takes it around the circle, parks it at the station, and says,” ok, you guys get off here, and you guys get off here. And if you have any complaints about the two hour delay, take it up with the bitch in be kitchen”
Why don’t orphans like to get lost?? Because somebody’s going to ask where their parents are. There was an American wrestler from Texas named John, who throughout his high school career had never lost a match. As he went on into college he continued undefeated. He became a national icon and symbol of American strength. News began to circulate of a Russian
Why do school shooter have the best shots??? They train at the best schools. ??????????????????????
There were 15 ugly guys on a bus. The bus crashed and they all went to heaven. God took pity on them and told the ugly dudes they could have one wish. The first guy said,"I want to be handsome. " God granted his wish. The second guy said,“I want to be more handsome than the first guy.”, God granted his wish. “The third guy said " I want to be more handsome than the second guy.” God granted his wish and this continued on and on until the 15 ugly guy.The ugly guy was laughing. Really hard. “What is your wish? ” God asked him. “I WANT ALL THESE GUYS UGLY AGAIN!!!” God granted his wish
I’ve sadly received a rejection letter from NASA. Strangely, it says there’s no space on their training programme.
%% %%A train walks into a bar. It says to the barkeeper, “I’ll have a gallon of ale.” “A gallon?” the barkeeper asks. “Yes,” replies the train, “I always end up chugging it.”
Whats the difference between me and a bus? Im not on fire…
Why did Sally drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock knock. Who’s there? Not Sally whats yellow and cant swim a bus full of toddlers
How many orphans does it take to “test drive” a bus? It depends on how much space the orphanage has and how much space the cemmetary has.
Why did Billy drop his ice cream? Cause he got hit by a bus
What did bus say to other bus? beeep
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