Transport jokes

What’s big and yellow and can’t swim, a bus filled with children

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Why did Sally drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock knock. Who’s there? Not Sally whats yellow and cant swim a bus full of toddlers

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Today was a bad day. First My ex got hit by a bus. Then I lost my job as a bus driver

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Q: How did the explorers get to school? A: They rode the Colum-bus!

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Do your buses run on time? No, they run on diesel.

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Today; Worst day ever My annoying sibling got hit by a train and I lost my job as a conductor.

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The driver says: "Ugh, that’s the ugliest baby I’ve ever seen!" The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to the man next to her: “The driver just insulted me!” The man says: “You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I’ll hold your monkey for you.”

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I’ve sadly received a rejection letter from NASA. Strangely, it says there’s no space on their training programme.

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Jim and Allyn are 2 mates in the Air Force. They were paired up for a training exersice. They got up into the air and Jim said, “okay Allyn, your helmet can control the missile when launched from the jet. Go ahead and test fire a missile and aim it at anything you want.” Allyn fired the missile and had his eyes set on an abandoned building. Jim then said, “I also forgot, watch out for friendly fire.” Allyn said “what?” As he looked over at Jim.

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Why did Billy drop his ice cream? Cause he got hit by a bus

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A man shot into a crowd at the train station and didn’t hit one person, when the police asked why he missed, someone said cause he gay. He couldn’t shoot straight

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