Woman jokes

I took my girlfriend out the other day… Man do I love being a sniper.

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My girlfriends last words I can’t wait to become a mom

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I keep looking for my girlfriends killer but no one wants to do it.

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My girlfriend got ran over by a bus I lost my job as a bus driver.

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Last halloween i went dressed as a woman. When i rang the doorbell an elderly woman opened and i made grunting noise and knocked the bowl of candy out of her hands. She immediately called the police and told them excactly what happened. The officer pulled me aside and asked me a few questions. First he asked are your parents here and i said nothing. Concerned by my answer he then asked if i was ok so i said nothing. He asked me what my name and i responded, "Hellen Keller.

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Why did the Chinese woman hang up? Because she Wang the Wong number

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Wife:Honey im pregnant Husband:Hi Pregnant im dad Wife:No you’re not

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I lost my job at the bank on my very first day. – A woman asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.

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Some trans “woman” came up to me and told me to act my age so I told him to act his gender How can you tell if your wife is dead? – The sex is the same but the dishes start piling up.

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My girlfriend is 19 and I’m 29. We go out to eat in a restaurant but the whole time I have to deal with being accused of being a pedo, being called disgusting and disturbed. It completely ruined our 10 year anniversary

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I know a woman who owns a taser. – She’s stunning!

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A wife and husband was setting up their computer and the husband makes the password my dick, but the wife fell on the floor laughing because the computer said the password was too short.

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Me and my wife were out at dinner me being 48 and her being 19, people where screaming at us and calling me a creep. It realy ruined our 10th anniversary