Q: What did the skeleton say when he proposed to his girlfriend? A: Will you marrow me?
Doctor: Madam, Your Husband Needs Rest And Peace So Here Are Some Sleeping Pills. Wife: Doctor, When Should I Give Them To Him? Doctor: They Are For You.!!
FIRST DATE man: i work with animals every day woman: oh how sweet! what is it that you do? man: im a butcher…
If depression is going to be my girlfriend. Will she leave me?
Little Johhny is walking around and peaks in his parents room, catching them having sex so he asks, “What are you guys doing?” and they reply “Nothing, nothing! we’re just uh, making cake” and they send him away. So he continues walking around and he hears some strange noises coming from his brothers room so he walks in and catches his brother and his brothers girlfriend having sex and then asks him “What are you guys doing?” and his brother yells “Get out! were making cake!” So Johnny leaves and goes to his room. The next day the whole family is at the dinner table and Little Johnny turns to his sister and says “So, you and your boyfriend were making cake last night huh!” and she replies “OMG! Howd you know! ?!?” and Johnny replies “Because, I licked the icing off the couch” ayyyyyy.
There was a cannibal who had a wife and (eight) kids.
If a woman sleeps with 10 men she’s a slut, but if a man does it… He’s gay, definitely gay.
I see some objects over there… oh never mind, that’s a woman.
My wife wanted a present that could go from Zero to 80 very quickly. So I got her a new set of bathroom scales.
Girlfriends are just like Ak47s they always go off on you.
One day I told my wife that she drew her I brows too high, She looked surprised.
My wife thinks i’m immature, so I told her to get out of my fort.
Y is it everyone wants to rub a pregnant woman stomach but never the man’s balls where the baby actually came from and the real ones that deserve the congratulations
Wife: “I look fat. Can you give me a compliment?” Husband: “You have perfect eyesight.”
A feminist walks into a bar. Her friend says “oh my god your shoulders are broad!” another woman says “are you sure it’s a woman?”
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