If a woman sleeps with 10 men she’s a slut, but if a man does it… He’s gay, definitely gay.
An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either.
Tell a woman she’s beautiful a hundred times and she won’t believe you. Tell a woman she’s fat once and she will remember it for the rest of her life because elephants never forget.
If a man drove over a woman, whose fault was it? The man, because he shouldn’t be driving in the kitchen.
My wife thinks i’m immature, so I told her to get out of my fort.
One day I told my wife that she drew her I brows too high, She looked surprised.
I brought my girlfriend home and introduced her to my family. My kids liked her, but my wife seemed upset
my girlfriend dumped me today apparently I don’t stand up for her in fights I don’t care she use to push me around all the time
I keep looking for my girlfriends killer but no one wants to do it.
My girlfriend broke up with me because I stole her wheelchair. But I knew she’d come crawling back to me.
Boy: my girlfriend didn’t dump me, I dumped her… Off the nearby cliff
I see some objects over there… oh never mind, that’s a woman.
%% %%It’s the World Cup Final, and a man makes his way to his seat right next to the pitch. He sits down, noticing that the seat next to him is empty. He leans over and asks his neighbor if someone will be sitting there. ‘No,’ says the neighbor. ‘The seat is empty.’ ‘This is incredible,’ said the man. ‘Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the Final and not use it?’ The neighbor says, ‘Well actually the seat belongs to me. I was supposed to come with my wife, but she passed away. This is the first World Cup Final we haven’t been to together since we got married.’ ‘Oh, I’m so sorry to hear that. That’s terrible….But couldn’t you find someone else, a friend, relative or even a neighbor to take her seat? ’ The man shakes his head. ‘No,’ he says. ‘They’re all at the funeral.’
Why couldn’t the lizard get a girlfriend? Because he had a reptile dysfunction!
What’s the difference between a battery and my wife? The battery has a positive side
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