What does a bar fly and a Necrophiliac have in common? They both enjoy a Cold one once in awhile.
What does the cannibal eat who comes late for dinner? The cold shoulder
I wanna go to Antarctica, but then I got cold feet.
what’s gassy and as cold as ice. ur-anus
Why is it always cold in the hospital? to keep the vegetables fresh. Why was it cold in Stephen hawkings house? Because he had a new window open…
So i was laying in bed and jt winter do my room is aleays cold cause the heater doesnt work. And i was thinking… It would be warmer if someone else was laying here with me… Then i layghed cause who would wanna be with me. Hahaha
Why did the cow jump over the moon? Because the farmer had cold hands!
Little Johnny is watching his mum rubbing cold cream on her face and he asks her “why are you rubbing that stuff on your face mother?” His mother replies “to make myself beautiful Johnny.” A few minutes later she starts rubbing the cream off with a tissue. Johnny says to her “What is the matter? Are you giving up?”
One dark stormy night when i was 8 years old I woke up in the middle of the night busting to pee, half asleep i walked down the stairs and toward the bathroom and heard a strange whirring sound that sounded like a ghost. When I opened the door i felt a strange cool breeze and the light came on automatically and the ghostly sound stopped, terrified I did what I had to and went back to bed. The next 3 nights the same thing happened and finally i decided i had to tell my mom no matter how hard to believe it sounded. The next night I woke up I went into my parents room and woke my mom up and said, “you have to come with me and see this it’s really important,” Half asleep she murmured, "oh what is it can’t it wait until the morning?’ I pleaded, “no you have to come see, our bathroom is haunted by a ghost when I go in the middle of the night I can hear a ghost sound then when i open the door I feel the cold as it swoops through me and the light comes on automatically. ” She yawned and said, “oh so that’s who’s been peeing in the refrigerator.”
Knock knock whos their. Cold. Cold who? “It is cold out here”
Ice cold coffee? Coll beans!
Yoo mama so stupid she tried to stop the cold war with a heater
what can u catch but not throw? … . . . … … … … … . . … … … … Ook. a cold!
Most annoying thing… When we send something in What’s app thinking our friend is online but can only see two grey ticks…
when you have to get your prostate checked and you can feel the cold rubber of the glove but you realize both the doctor’s hands are on your shoulders
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