Best Jokes

3 May: Top today:

People are like potatoes.

We may look different, but we all taste the same with a little ketchup.

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What’s the difference?
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How do you find out if your kid is gay? Lock him in a closet and if he comes out his gay if not his dead straight.

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Straight jokes
3 May: Family jokes:

My daughter has gotten to the age where she asks me embarrassing questions about sex. Just this morning she asked me “is that the best you can do?”

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I love you Hebrew john

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My friend Jimmy said his dad is exactly like Santa, I asked “Why is it because he gives people presents?” Jimmy told me “No it’s because I hear so many good things about him but and how he’s gonna come home, but never see him.”

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3 May: Doctors jokes:

What is the perfect job for a paedophile

A physical doctor for kids

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Woman: Doctor, where are we going? Doctor: To the morgue. Woman: I’m not dead yet, doctor. Doctor: We’re not at morgue yet, either

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What did the doctor say to the chinese patient? Sum ting wong

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3 May: Bar jokes:

So a neutron went to a bar, he asked the bartender how much for a beer, the bartender said, " For you, NO charge."

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3 May: Nut jokes:

What do you call a Dino stripper?

A dinowhore

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3 May: Dark Humor:

What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn’t matter, he won’t come anyway.

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Yo mamma is so ugly she made blind kids cry

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I remember my grandfathers last words:

Are you holding the ladder

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3 May: Hope jokes:

What did the fork say to the cake when he said i hope u get eaten

Fork off

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Twinkle, twinkle little star. I hope i’ll get hit by a car. am not dead yet, i hope i’ll die. I hope i’ll born to a new hole life.

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A police man once said I will never forget 9/11 I said I hope not that’s your phone number

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3 May: Hit jokes:

Any girl can be a squirter if you hit the right artery

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When you hit a speed bump in a school zone and remember, there are no speed bumps.

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3 May: Dream jokes:

So one time I had a dream where I as on a road trip and we drove a gulf cart and a Susan, which I don’t know why the heck the name of the car was called a Susan. We went into this house and there was like a woman there and we went into this bathroom which looked like a public bathroom which was so weird!!!

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One of the most popular documentaries of the 2010’s was ‘Jiro Dreams of Sushi’.

One of the least popular documentaries was ‘Jiro’s Nightmare of Ass-Rape’.

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3 May: Sea jokes:

Why did the fish cross the sea?

To get to the other tide!??????

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