Computer jokes

When the C.I.A. raided Osama Bin Laden’s house, they found steam on his computer this means he was a gamer. He raged a little too hard and went for New York.

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A computer science student is studying under a tree and another pulls up on a flashy new bike. The first student asks, “Where’d you get that?” The student on the bike replies, “While I was studying outside, a beautiful girl pulled up on her bike. She took off all her clothes and said, “You can have anything you want.”” The first student responds, “Good choice! Her clothes probably wouldn’t have fit you.”

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I love the smell of my F5 key. – It’s very refreshing.

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I heard the man who invented Autocorrect died; may he wrist in peach.

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whats the difference between paul walker and a computer? i give a f@ck if my computer crashes

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One apple a day keeps the doctor away, not logging onto servers using management or service accounts keeps SecOps people away.

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I have a picture of Uranus on my computer

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What’s missing in an orphanage computer? The mother board

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What’s one thing orphans don’t have on their computer? A home page.

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You make the juice go through my power brick.

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There was a car accident and the cops pull up to the crime seen to start asking people questions. The police started talking to a blonde lady and said what happened here she responded by saying a car crash. They then asked but how did it happen, she responded the cars crashed into each other. They finally said but why did it happen. The lady said oh i know where your going with this. It happened because when cars push on the gas peddle the car goes forward and they both pushed it so they both went forward and hit each other. One cop said never mind ma’m and they stared walking away. The blonde lady then said oh and officers my computer froze do you think i should put in the microwave or in the oven?

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Why did Wi-Fi and the computer get married? Because they had a connection

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Your Momma’s so fat, the recursive function calculating her mass causes a stack overflow.

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Don’t fart in a Apple Store It has no Windows

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why is stephen hawking an organ donator? because he saved 200 computers.

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