Computer jokes

What did Stephen hawkings computer say when he died ?? … ERROR

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Some people are like a software update. When I see them I think, “Not now.” What happens when a computer thinks it knows better than a human? Ask Boeing.

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my mom is telling me get off friday night funkin or she will slam my head aginst the keybore weherhrqqkh[qokqho[krq3[t4i2-4q43q343q44334q43

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What do computer programming and 9/11 have in common? They’re both inside jobs.

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What part is usually missing in an orphan’s computer system? Motherboard.

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what’s the difference between a pile of dead bodies and a computer? i don’t know I have both what is the difference between hilary duff and a computer? you only have to punch information into a computer once.

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What is the difference between a school bully and a feminist? The school bully does not hide behide there computer screen.

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How did the computer hackers get away from the scene of the crime? I think they just hacked the chrime

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Why was the Computer late to work? Coz it had a hard drive… LMAO

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A computer science student is studying under a tree and another pulls up on a flashy new bike. The first student asks, “Where’d you get that?” The student on the bike replies, “While I was studying outside, a beautiful girl pulled up on her bike. She took off all her clothes and said, “You can have anything you want.”” The first student responds, “Good choice! Her clothes probably wouldn’t have fit you.”

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One apple a day keeps the doctor away, not logging onto servers using management or service accounts keeps SecOps people away.

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One day a computer said to another computer, "Why are you so dumb." The other computer replied, “Because I have low memory.”

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Q: How do you know when an Asian broke into your house? A: Your math homework is done, your computer is upgraded, and 2 hours later he’s still trying to back out of the driveway.

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Bill Gates teaches a kindergarten class to count to ten. “dos, 1, 2, 3, 3.1, 95, 98, ME, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 8.1, 10.”

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What do you get when you cross a shark and a computer? Computer bytes!

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