Computer jokes

My wife told me she’ll slam my head on the keyboard if I don’t get off the computer. I’m not too worried, I think she’s jokinlkjhfakljn m,.nbziyoao78yv87dfaoyuofaytdf

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I love the smell of my F5 key. – It’s very refreshing.

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Why did Stephen Hawking not believe in God? Computers don’t really have a specific religion

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What is the difference between an American and a computer? An American doesn’t have trouble shooting

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Why was the computer so good at golf? because he had a hard drive if a dog made a computer it would have a mega bite

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A man walks into a library and says to the librarian, “Do you have that book for men with small penises?” The librarian looks on her computer and says, “I don’t know if it’s in yet.” “Yeah, that’s the one!”

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Why can’t orphans build computers? They don’t know where to put the motherboard

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Why did Wi-Fi and the computer get married? Because they had a connection

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There was a car accident and the cops pull up to the crime seen to start asking people questions. The police started talking to a blonde lady and said what happened here she responded by saying a car crash. They then asked but how did it happen, she responded the cars crashed into each other. They finally said but why did it happen. The lady said oh i know where your going with this. It happened because when cars push on the gas peddle the car goes forward and they both pushed it so they both went forward and hit each other. One cop said never mind ma’m and they stared walking away. The blonde lady then said oh and officers my computer froze do you think i should put in the microwave or in the oven?

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