What do you call a woman with one leg? Eileen.
When its been halloween for a few months but there’s still a body hanging from your neighbours tree
what do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn’t matter whutcha call him he ain’t comin’
What’s the similarity between a broken pencil and my life? They’re both pointless.
You must be depression, because you make me want to kill myself ;)
Person: where do i commit sucide Dog: roof Person: good idea
I was speaking at my grandpa’s funeral and I told everybody his last words: “You still holding the latter?”
My girlfriends last words I can’t wait to become a mom
I’ll never forget my dad’s last words. “Erase my search history, son.”
I will always remember my baby sisters last words.“What is the fire for?”.
Whats the difference between a school bus and my Dad’s van? Schools buses usually don’t have screaming and crying children
What’s the difference between an emo and my clothes? my clothes don’t hang themselves.
When the emo kid hangs himself and the autistic kid thinks that it’s a pinata… BATTER UP TO THE PLATE!
I am a failure to everyone and decided to attemp a suicide, guess what? I failed
When you realize you have depression and depression realize how stupid you were
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