The teacher asked her student to say the alphabet , The student recited the alphabet abcdefghijklmnoqrstuvwxyz, Where’s the p, He looked down to the floor and said : it’s running down my legs
The more suicidal people there are the less suicidal people there are
What was Steven Hawking’s last words? ERROR 101
One night a girl said to her family "Goodnight Mommy, Goodnight Daddy, Goodnight Grandma, Goodbye Grandpa. the next morning her grandpa died. That night she said "Goodnight mommy, Goodnight daddy, Goodbye Grandma. the next morning the grandma died. The dad started to fear for his life because he was next. That night the girl said "Goodnight mommy, Goodbye daddy. the next morning the dad woke up and he was perfectly fine but when he went into the kitchen he saw his wife crying. when he asked her whats wrong she said “The Mail Man died”.
Any game: Are you a boy or a girl? Non-binary people: cries
Brian has a crush on a cute girl Sally from school so he goes and tells his dad about her and he says sorry son you cant like her she is your sister. So Brian is okay with it and he starts to like another girl Madison and he goes up to his dad and says I have a crush on this girl Madison and again the dad goes oh sorry son you cant like any girl in school they are all your sisters so he goes crying to his mom and says dad said I cant like any girl because they are all my sisters and the mom goes oh it’s okay you can like any girl you want because he is not your dad.
What do you call Amber Heard crying during the lawsuit? A DEPPression. (If you are a fan of either Johnny Depp or Amber Heard, you might get the joke)
Q: What did the drunk emo say to the bartender? A: Nothing! He was hung over. My sister thinks shes so smart, shes said onions are the only food that makes you cry So I threw a coconut at her
What’s the hardest line to draw in a hospital? * … A FLATLINE!
What do you do after your girlfriend with two broken legs dumps you? Take her wheel chair, she’ll come crawling back.
i have no friends but then i realize my true friends are anxiety and depression
What does PEMDAS stand for? Please End My Depression And Suffering
What is the difference between a sloth and a depressed kid? A sloth doesn’t need a rope to hang
My life Tell me when you get it
Why did Billy not like the soccer ball he got for Christmas?.. He has no legs…
RUS | ENG