Why did the Chinese woman hang up? Because she Wang the Wong number
if you ever get mad at a person that cramppled their leg. don’t forget that they can hide but they cant run.
people talking me asking whats the worst day in the year for them. Person 1: The first day of school cause i don’t like going to school Person 2: Valentines day cause its to lovey Me: oh nice mines my birthday cause its when i was born
Why Couldn’t the Japanese man give a high five? Because Logan Paul left him hanging.
An Emo girl walks up to a tree to give it a high five… the tree left her hanging
Denki- hey mineta i have a joke Mineta- …go on… Denki- Ochakos booty Mineta- i dont get it? Denki- exactly Mineta- cries T_T
I will always remember my grandpa’s last words. SHIT, THE LADDER IS FALLING!
Three men are outside Heaven’s gates waiting to be go to through Heaven. The angel at the gate tells them “Depending on the length of time and your faithfulness to your last partner decides your way across the bridge to Heaven”. The first guy says “I was with my wife for 5 years and cheated 3 times”. The angel gives him an old model pick up, the second guy says “11 years and only once” and is granted a Mercedes. The last man says “20 years and not once , I loved her with all my heart” and with the angel impressed he gets a gold edition Lamborghini and sets off ahead of the other two men. Hours later the two men catch up to him crying behind the wheel and one says " I know we are dead but it could be much worse". The guy looks up and says “How! I just went past my wife on a skateboard”
i remember my grandfathers last words: “is that loaded?”
If you were a food what would you be? Friend 1-Pizza cause I’m so cheesy Friend 2-Chocolate chip cookie cause I have lots of friends Me-donut cause I’m so empty inside
When its been halloween for a few months but there’s still a body hanging from your neighbours tree
Famous last words of my uncle: (a bomb disposal expert) yes the red wire
What was Steven Hawking’s last words? ERROR 101
I saw my friend hang themselves my response was i guess they wanted to hang with someone
I’m going to hang myself in the bathroom at school and put a note telling kids that I’m a pinata
RUS | ENG