what fell down the tree first the emo or the apple guess what the apple because the emo got left hanging
i saw a little kid crying yesterday, so i asked him where his parents were. God i love working at an orphanage
Teacher : Who here has thought about committing suicide? Half of the class : raises hand Teacher : … The half of the class: Starts talking about how they were thinking of doing it
Sex is like math. Subtract the clothes, Add the bed, Divide the legs, and pray to God there is no multiplying.
why don’t emos live alone?they like to hang with their freinds.
I’ll never forget my Grandads last words…SON WHERE DID U GET A GRENADE FROM?!
I still remember my grandpas last words stop wobbling the ladder you cunt
1.) What’s Yellow And Can’t Swim? A Bus Full Of Children 2.) Did you hear bout the pilsbury dough boy? he died of a yeast infection 3.) I will never forget my grandads last words… “you’re still holding the ladder right?” 4.) I have a fish that can breakdance… only for 20 seconds though, and only once 5.) give a man a match and he will be warm for a few hours… lite a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life
Gambler A guy walks into a butcher’s shop and says "Sir, are you a gambling man?" The butcher says, “Why yes, as a matter of fact I am.” "Then I’ll bet you $25 you can’t reach up and touch that meat hanging over your head right there." The butcher thinks for a moment and says, "I’m sorry, I won’t take that bet." The guy says, “But I thought you said you were a gambling man. ” “I am. But the steaks are too high.”
i remember my moms last words before her divorce, did you just load in me.
Bro I love hanging out with white people, its either we play Yahtzee Or We Playin Nazi
I’ll always remember my father’s last words: I’m gonna sleep for a little.
after a surgery, a man claimed he couldn’t feel his legs, i replied “OF COURSE NOT, I AMPUTATED YOUR f@ckING ARMS!”
When its been halloween for a few months but there’s still a body hanging from your neighbours tree
I have an auntie who has no arms and no legs. She is my dad’s half sister.
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