Once i was walking along the beach and there was a girl with no arms or legs there, i walked by and she said excuse me, will you touch me ive never been touched before, i was like okay so i touched her, i kept on walking along and there was the same girl, she said sir will you kiss me, i went alright so i went up and kissed her, i thought that was weird but anyway i kept walking along and there she was again, she said sir will you f@ck me? I went okay so i picked her up and threw her in the ocean and went YOUR f@ckED NOW
My mom always said garlic powder makes everything better so i sprinkled some on my divorce papers and my wifes broken leg.
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in a pile of leaves? Russel
You use your legs as support you count on your fingers
What do you call Amber Heard crying during the lawsuit? A DEPPression. (If you are a fan of either Johnny Depp or Amber Heard, you might get the joke)
What was stephan Hawkins last words\windows10shutting down
Knock Knock! Who’s their? It’s Dave! Dave Who? *Dave proceeds to break down crying at the realization that his grandmother’s Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she no longer remembers him.
Why did the Chinese woman hang up? Because she Wang the Wong number
If you watch " jaws" backward it will be a heartwarming story about a shark who giving arms and legs to disable people
I’ll always remember my father’s last words: I’m gonna sleep for a little.
im jealous at me led lights. cause they r hanging from the celling ans im not.
Snow everywhere, it’s Christmas time. A person looks at the tree. The person: Only last thing left to hang! He grabs a noose.
i will never forget my little brothers last word rip. his last words: paint dosent taste good
My girlfriends last words I can’t wait to become a mom
you tell an orphan joke to an orphan you start laughing they start crying they say they are going to tell their mom then you start laughing harder
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