I still remember my grandpas last words Stop shaking the damn ladder
according to all known laws of aviation, a bee should not be able to fly, it wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. but of course, bees fly anyway because bees don’t care about what humans think is impossible, Yellow, Black. Yellow, Black
What was Stephen Hawkins last words? System failure
Kid:what is between moms legs? Dad:paridise. Kid whats between you legs? Dad:the key to paridise. Kid:well uou better change the lock the neighbor has the key to.
I’ll never forget my father’s last words… Oh f@ck, it’s a bus!
A man is walking on the deck of a cruise ship, when he sees a woman, without arms and legs, crying. The man says “What’s wrong?” The woman says “I’ve never been hugged before.” So, the man gives her a hug and walks away. The next day, the man sees the woman, on the deck, crying again. The man says “What’s wrong, now?” The woman says “I’ve never been kissed before.” So, the man gives her a kiss and walks away. The next day, the same thing occurs. The man says “Oh, for Christ’s sake! What’s wrong, this time?!” The woman says “Well, I’ve never been f@cked before.” So, the man picks her up, throws her into the ocean, and yells “YOU’RE f@ckED!”
Why were the cherries ?? crying? Because their parents were in a jam.
I will always remember my uncle’s last words, “What’s The Shovel For?”
What do you call a woman with one arm and one leg? Eileen Doctor approaches a patient in Hospital and says “I have some good news and bad news" so the patient says “What is the bad news?” the Doctor replies “I have had to amputate both your legs” so the patent says “Well what is the good news? ” the Doctor replies "I have found someone to buy your slippers”…
Why did the turkey cross the road twice? To prove he wasn’t a chicken!
i remember my grandfathers last words: “is that loaded?”
Yo mamma is so ugly she made blind kids cry
What has 4 wheels 2 legs and loves his shoulder Stephen hawking
When you break up with your online girlfriend, and you hear your uncle crying in the other room.
Grandpa’s last words,why do you have a chain saw
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