Teacher : Who here has thought about committing suicide? Half of the class : raises hand Teacher : … The half of the class: Starts talking about how they were thinking of doing it
Little Johnny is watching his dad shave one morning and his dad was making alot of mistakes. Suddenly his dad screams " bitches and asses!" Johnny asks what it meant and his dad replied " aunts and uncles" Oh. next thing he hears is “dicks and pussies!” Johnny asks " what’s that mean?" To which his dad replied " uh coats and hats." Oh next thing he know he sees his dad jumping around the the bathroom yelling " f@cking, f@ck,f@ck,f@ck" " what does that mean dad?" And his dad yells " cut Johnny, it means cut!!!" Oh. Next week is Thanksgiving and the doorbell rings and Johnny answers it and says " Hey bitches and asses, hang your dicks and pussies here, dad’s in the kitchen f@cking the turkey.
I was crying at school telling my friends my grandpa died, And they asked me what his last words were. His last words were “Are you still holding the ladder?”
Famous last words: I COULD EAT THIS IN ONE BITE!
Depression is like therapy the more you see it the more you get used to it
What’s the difference between an emo and my clothes? my clothes don’t hang themselves.
(Just a joke) when Stephen Hawking fell over and hurt his leg, his dad said " It’ll get better just walk it off."
Whats the difference batween an onion and a baby. One makes you cry when you cut it up
Why did Logan Paul go to the suicide forest? to see who’s hanging around.
I’ll never forget my bosses last words: " We shall serve the best meat in our burgers! "
what is the simularite with a sloth and a depresed kid they both hang from trees
what do you call a dog with no legs? It don’t matter what you call it. It ain’t coming.
Chuck Norris doesn’t turn on his shower, he just stares at it until it cries
When the people that see u Cry that doesn’t mean they miss u That mean they scared of yo Onion breath????
Friend #1: “Whats your favourite thing about trees?” Friend #2: “Apples” Me: “I can hang myself in them.”
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