Dark Humor

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Whats the difference batween an onion and a baby. One makes you cry when you cut it up

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I’ll never forget my grandma’s last words, “What are you doing in here with that hammer?”

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what does an apple and a lawyer have in common? they both look good hanging from a tree

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knock knock who’s there? Depression medicine and therapy GO AWAY!

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I woke up this morning thinking it was gonna be a great day. But then I realized I was still alive.

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I will always remeber my dads last words… “15 dollars and ill jump.” if i could make someone tell me there last words theyd say " Make me"

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I told the judge I thought she was unconscious before she woke up crying. The judge asked: why didn’t you drug her again so she would forget?

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Friend #1: “Whats your favourite thing about trees?” Friend #2: “Apples” Me: “I can hang myself in them.”

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