what was my great grandpas last words SHIT MG42!!!
What do you call a woman with one leg? Eileen.
according to all known laws of aviation, a bee should not be able to fly, it wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. but of course, bees fly anyway because bees don’t care about what humans think is impossible, Yellow, Black. Yellow, Black
what does an apple and a lawyer have in common? they both look good hanging from a tree
This man got his left arm and left leg cut off and someone asked him “How are You?” And he said “I’m all right now.”
“I bought my little sister a trampoline for her birthday but all she wants to do is sit in her wheelchair and cry”
I can’t hang out with a emo when they are sad? Why? Because it cuts deeply
A wife decided to leave for a vacation, leaving her husband in supervision of her mother and her cat. After a few days, she called her husband and asked, “How is everything going?” He responded with, “The cat is dead.” She cried out and said, “Why couldn’t you’ve broken the new slowly? You could have said the cat is playing on the roof or on the first day, and the next say it broke its leg, then the next that the poor things dead! Anyways, how’s my mom?” “She’s playing on the roof.”
I’ll never forget my brother’s last words: “Why is there a revolver in your hand?”
What do you call a man off the ground? Hanged.
What does an emo do on Halloween, they hang like a decoration
i will never forget my mother and fathers last words WHERE THE SAM HELL DID YOU GET A GRANADE
What has 5 arms, 3 legs, and 2 feet? The finish line at the Boston Marathon.
What’s the difference between a coat hangerband an emo? Nothing that both hang
Why do orphans become criminals? To know what it’s like to be Wanted. Why are orphans bad at poker? They don’t know what a full house is. I saw a child crying yesterday so I asked him where his parents were. Bad move. I got fired from my job at the orphanage. What do you call an orphan’s family reunion? Me time. Did you know? The letter ‘f’ in orphan stands for family. What is an orphan’s least favorite song? We are Family. What’s an orphan’s least favorite tv show? Family Guy. What’s an orphan’s least favorite movie? Meet the Parents. What’s an orphan’s least favorite type of music? House. Next: Inappropriate Jokes What’s an orphan’s least favorite store? Home Depot. What’s an orphan’s favorite band? Foster the People. What do you call a virgin from Alabama? An orphan. Where do orphan chickens end up? Foster Farms What beer do orphans drink? Foster’s. Why do orphans have water with their cereal? Because their dad never came back with the milk. What do you call a fish with no parents? An orfin Why do orphans like playing tennis? Because it’s the only love they get. Me: Are you an orphan? Orphan: Yes, what gave me away? Me: Your parents.
RUS | ENG
