What do you call when a friend calm his suicidal friend? Hang in there buddy
My dad, unfortunately, passed away when we couldn’t remember his blood type… His last words to us were, “Be positive!”
my sons so ungrateful. i bought him a trampoline and all he does is sit in his wheelchair and cry all day.
The more suicidal people there are the less suicidal people there are
They say string theory is hanging on by a thread.
When the emo kid hangs himself and the autistic kid thinks that it’s a pinata… BATTER UP TO THE PLATE!
Dont say your life is a joke because jokes got meaning.
To avoid getting drafted, a young man slips into a nunnery to hide from some draft board agents who are after him. Desperate, he approaches a nun and asks her to hide him. “Get under my robes,” says the nun. “No one will look for you there.” The nun lifts up her robes and the man says, “Hey, that’s a fine pair of legs you have there, sister.” “Yeah, well if you look a bit higher you’ll see a fine set of balls, ” replies the nun. “I didn’t want to get drafted either.”
A policeman found a dead body of a man on the street, he thought he recognized the body and the 2 friends he usually hung out with so he called in one of the friends. The friend looked into the dead body’s face and said, “yep that’s definitely Joe,” but then to be absolutely sure he turned the body over, pulled down the back of his pants and said, "oh no wait that’s not Joe. the policeman called in the 2nd friend, the 2nd friend looked into the dead body’s face and said, “yep that’s definitely Joe,” but then to be absolutely sure he turned the body over, pulled down the back of his pants and said, "oh no wait that’s not Joe. Confused the policeman asked, “how is it that when you look into his face you’re sure he is your friend, but when you look at his ass you’re sure he is not?” The 1st friend said, “well you see Joe has 2 assholes.” "Are you serious? the policeman asked. “Oh yes,” he replied, “we’ve never actually seen them but when the 3 of us hang out together people point and say, hey there’s Joe with those 2 assholes.”
To whoever has my voodoo doll, please hold its hand.
What do you call a cow with two legs Answer: Your mom
What’s the difference between a coat hangerband an emo? Nothing that both hang
I have an auntie who has no arms and no legs. She is my dad’s half sister.
i will always remember my grandfathers last words “ill just check if its poisonous”.
if you slit your wrist while crying in pain, that’s self-harm. If you slit your wrist but have no expression, that’s acting. it isn’t any of those if it’s suicide.
RUS | ENG
