A man woke up from a serious surgery. He screamed, “Doctor! Doctor! I can’t feel my legs!”. And the doctor replied, “I know. I amputated you arms.”
i went to a butcher house with my little cousin and seen a baby pig and told her look its pepa pig she started crying
what did the suicidal kid say to the tree? dont leave me hanging
Bro I love hanging out with white people, its either we play Yahtzee Or We Playin Nazi
What do you call a woman with one leg? Eileen.
A man is walking on the deck of a cruise ship, when he sees a woman, without arms and legs, crying. The man says “What’s wrong?” The woman says “I’ve never been hugged before.” So, the man gives her a hug and walks away. The next day, the man sees the woman, on the deck, crying again. The man says “What’s wrong, now?” The woman says “I’ve never been kissed before.” So, the man gives her a kiss and walks away. The next day, the same thing occurs. The man says “Oh, for Christ’s sake! What’s wrong, this time?!” The woman says “Well, I’ve never been f@cked before.” So, the man picks her up, throws her into the ocean, and yells “YOU’RE f@ckED!”
Orphan boy:Your dad is probably dissapointed of you i mean look at you Me: well at least my parents kept me wheres yours
I started beating my washing machine beacause it wasn’t working, my wife started crying. Knock knock Who’s there Insomnia You’ll fit right in along with Depression and anxiety, you can help keep me awake at night because Depression is struggling with that… Well now I can "t cry myself to sleep anymore…
Why did the turkey cross the road twice? To prove he wasn’t a chicken!
“Hold my beer, watch this.”
I started crying when dad was cutting onions. Onions was such a good dog.
What has 5 arms, 3 legs, and 2 feet? The finish line at the Boston Marathon.
I cannot moderate myself at all. It’s either I don’t take my meds, or I take the entire bottle. Decisions decisions… Bleach solves so many problems, Staines, Dirty dishes, messes, and over population
Being sad is my only happiness
The only time you see a depressed person lifted up - when they hang themselves.
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