Any game: Are you a boy or a girl? Non-binary people: cries
I don’t call it suicide. I call it population control
i will never forget my little brothers last word rip. his last words: paint dosent taste good
**** (A cell phone in an upscale gym locker room in NYC rings and the man puts it on loud speaker next to him … everyone else in the room stops to listen): Man : Hello? Woman : Hi honey, it’s me. Are you at the club? Man : Yes. Woman : I’m out shopping and found a beautiful leather coat. It’s only $2,000 – is it OK if I buy it? Man : Sure, go ahead if you like it that much. Woman : I also stopped by that new Lexus dealership and saw one of the new models I really like – it’s on an opening special. Man : How much? Woman : $90,000. Man : Wow! OK, but for that price I want it with all the options. Woman : Great! Oh, and one more thing … I was just talking to Jamie and found out that the house we wanted to buy last year is back on the market … they’re asking $980,000 for it. Remember it was well over a million when we looked at it? Man : I dunno. Make an offer for $900,000 and they’ll probably take it. If not, we can go the extra $80,000 if that’s what you really want. Woman : OK. I’ll see you later! I love you so much! Man : I love you to. **** (The man hangs up. The other men in the locker room were staring at him in astonishment, mouths wide open. ) The man turns around and says : “Anyone know whose phone this is”?
I wish my hair was depressed Cause then it would cut itself
what did the suicidal kid say to the tree? dont leave me hanging
I still remember my dad’s last words "don’t worry son, Allah will be pleased"
Three guys are on a plane one is Asian, one is Mexican, and the other is an American, and the Pilot says “There is to much weight on the plane, you all need to throw something off.” So the Mexican threw out a burrito and said , “I have plenty of these where I come from,” the the Asian threw out some rice and said “I have plenty of these in my country,” The American threw out a bomb and said, “I have a lot of these in my country.” The plane crashes anyway and the three men start to walk away from the crash, as they were walking the found a boy crying they asked him what was wrong and he said, “A ton of Buritos fell out of the sky and got me all messy,” The men started walking away and soon enough they found another boy crying they asked him what was wrong and he said, “A ton of rice fell out of the sky and sherded all my clothes.” The guys knew who did it but avoided the trouble, they kept on walking and found a kid laughing so hard he was on the ground, and they asked what had been so funny the boy said, “MY GRANDPA FARTED AND THE HOUSE BLEW UP!!!”
i remember my moms last words before her divorce, did you just load in me.
Why did Billy not like the soccer ball he got for Christmas?.. He has no legs…
Whats the benefit of taking a depressed kid to the store Scan the wrist and you might get a discount
Whats the difference batween an onion and a baby. One makes you cry when you cut it up
What do you call a cow that has two legs shorter on one side of its body compared to the other? LEAN BEEF!
Orphans are the best targets for bullying, since who they gonna cry too? their parents?
where do you find a dog with no arms or legs -where you left it
RUS | ENG
