What do you call a pig with no legs? A groundhog.
A man walks into a bar. Sits down and asks the bartender for 12 shots of vodka. The bartender asks what the man is celebrating for and said he’ll give one shot on the house. The man said I celebrating my first blowjob. And nah if 12 shots doesn’t get the taste out of my mouth nothing will.
Where do you find a turtle with no legs? Right where you left it.
I can barely remember the last words my uncle told me let go of my nose
They say Chuck Norris’s tears cure cancer, too bad he doesn’t cry
The emo kid tried to high five the tree But the tree left him hanging
one time i broke up with my roblox girlfriend by sending her a message, 30 seconds later i heard my uncle crying in the next room
What’s the difference between a baby and an onion ? One cries when you peel its skin off, the other makes you cry when you peel its skin off.
I’ll remember my last words…“SORRY IM NOT SORRY”
Brian has a crush on a cute girl Sally from school so he goes and tells his dad about her and he says sorry son you cant like her she is your sister. So Brian is okay with it and he starts to like another girl Madison and he goes up to his dad and says I have a crush on this girl Madison and again the dad goes oh sorry son you cant like any girl in school they are all your sisters so he goes crying to his mom and says dad said I cant like any girl because they are all my sisters and the mom goes oh it’s okay you can like any girl you want because he is not your dad.
people call me a bad person but just the other day i saw a little kid crying and asked him where were his parents , i love working at the orphanage At school, bobby boy’s classmate tells him some depressing stuff. Later that day, bobby comes home crying and his mom greets him at the door with “why are you crying”. Bobby says “someone said my grandpa died, but when did he die”. His mom looks him straight in the eye and says “depends, which one are you referring to?”
Why did Logan Paul go to the suicide forest? to see who’s hanging around.
Depression is like therapy the more you see it the more you get used to it
When your sad don’t feel down about yourself break someone’s leg and laugh.
Chuck Norris doesn’t turn on his shower, he just stares at it until it cries
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