Dark Humor

i remember my moms last words before her divorce, did you just load in me.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

a mom cows last words were to the mom cows son they were you are then died the son though that he was adopted but then 3 years later the mom cow rose from the dead and said to her son that she was going to say you were adorable then she died once more then 2 years later she rose from htm title=' her son and that’s why we adopted you.'>the dead for the last time to say to her son and that’s why we adopted you.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2

I fear my last words will be ‘‘hold my beer and watch this.’’

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

I will never forget my Grandpa’s last words, “What are you doing with that rope and saw”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

what did the suicidal kid say to the tree? dont leave me hanging

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Watches sad movie with family Everyone else: Crying Sister: How aren’t you crying? Me: I have no tear left to cry…

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

My memes are ironic but my depression is chronic.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Why dose a milking stool have 3 legs? Because, the cow has the utter one.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2

Me: Wanna play 9/11? Friend: What’s that? Me: Its a game where I kick you in both legs and watch you fall.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

I’ll remember my last words…“SORRY IM NOT SORRY”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

why do we tell actors to break a leg … so they can get in the cast!

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Little Johnny is watching his dad shave one morning and his dad was making alot of mistakes. Suddenly his dad screams " bitches and asses!" Johnny asks what it meant and his dad replied " aunts and uncles" Oh. next thing he hears is “dicks and pussies!” Johnny asks " what’s that mean?" To which his dad replied " uh coats and hats." Oh next thing he know he sees his dad jumping around the the bathroom yelling " f@cking, f@ck,f@ck,f@ck" " what does that mean dad?" And his dad yells " cut Johnny, it means cut!!!" Oh. Next week is Thanksgiving and the doorbell rings and Johnny answers it and says " Hey bitches and asses, hang your dicks and pussies here, dad’s in the kitchen f@cking the turkey.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Suicide is never the answer Suicide is the question The answer is yes

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Why did the noble gas cry? Because all his friends Argon.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

I wanna be a Christmas decoration cause they always do be hanging

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
- up - << N E X T! >> random

© àíåêäîòîâ.net, 1997 - 2026