Dark Humor

What do you call a smurf with no arms or legs? A paintball

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Me: Man I wish my clothes were emo. Friend:Why? Me:so they would hang themselves

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I still remember my grandpas last words Stop shaking the damn ladder

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i remember my moms last words before her divorce, did you just load in me.

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What is the difference between a washing machine and a child…? The washing machine doesn’t cry when you put a load in it.

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Suicide is never the answer Suicide is the question The answer is yes

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i will never forget my mother and fathers last words WHERE THE SAM HELL DID YOU GET A GRANADE

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I tried to high five a tree it left me hanging

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What do you call a dog with no legs ? It doesn’t matter he isn’t coming to you.

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Whats Big, bounces, and make little kids cry? my donation to the orphanage :)

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I wish I could say that my life is a joke but I can’t because jokes have a meaning

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Emo kids counting be like: 1,2,3 come hang with me! 4,5,6 Gonna get new slits! 7,8,9 Suicide! 10,11,12 Bring some pills!

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I saw this little girl crying I asked her where her parents where she cried more man I love working at an orphanage

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A man woke up in a hospital after a serious accident. He yelled, "Doctor! Doctor! I can’t feel my legs!" The Doctor replies, “I know, I amputated your arms.”

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What does an emo do on Halloween, they hang like a decoration

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