what do you call a dog with no legs? It don’t matter what you call it. It ain’t coming.
If I went to walmart, I would be able to scan my own wrists because they’re barcodes too.
To avoid getting drafted, a young man slips into a nunnery to hide from some draft board agents who are after him. Desperate, he approaches a nun and asks her to hide him. “Get under my robes,” says the nun. “No one will look for you there.” The nun lifts up her robes and the man says, “Hey, that’s a fine pair of legs you have there, sister.” “Yeah, well if you look a bit higher you’ll see a fine set of balls, ” replies the nun. “I didn’t want to get drafted either.”
When i was at work i say this kid crying i said where are your parents. God i love working in a orphanage
The most powerful thing in the world is babies. This is because they cry and get what every they want.
You should never leave a man hanging. Unless they are still alive…
I’ve looked everywhere… I just can’t seem to find where I left my will to live
Why are washers better than babies? Washers don’t cry when you put a load in it.
Once there was a girl named Sally! She had no arms or legs, was mute, deaf, and blind Knock knock Who’s there? Not sally
What is the difference between a washing machine and a child…? The washing machine doesn’t cry when you put a load in it.
I still remember my grandpas last words Stop shaking the damn ladder
If you watch " jaws" backward it will be a heartwarming story about a shark who giving arms and legs to disable people
I still remember the last words my grandpa said before he kicked the bucket. He said, “Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?”
To whoever stole my antidepressants I hope you are happy now
What has two legs but can’t walk? Pants ??
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