Dark Humor

U wanna hear a Suicide joke nvm it didn’t make it

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A girl and dog get dropped off at an orphanage why was she crying before she went in Because the people came back for their dog

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I cannot moderate myself at all. It’s either I don’t take my meds, or I take the entire bottle. Decisions decisions… Bleach solves so many problems, Staines, Dirty dishes, messes, and over population

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why did the depressed person cross the road. to get ran over.

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Where does a girl with one leg work? IHOP.

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What does a cannibal and a spider have in common? Both eight legs

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A man is walking on the deck of a cruise ship, when he sees a woman, without arms and legs, crying. The man says “What’s wrong?” The woman says “I’ve never been hugged before.” So, the man gives her a hug and walks away. The next day, the man sees the woman, on the deck, crying again. The man says “What’s wrong, now?” The woman says “I’ve never been kissed before.” So, the man gives her a kiss and walks away. The next day, the same thing occurs. The man says “Oh, for Christ’s sake! What’s wrong, this time?!” The woman says “Well, I’ve never been f@cked before.” So, the man picks her up, throws her into the ocean, and yells “YOU’RE f@ckED!”

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What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef. What do you call a cow with 3 legs? Lean beef. What do you call a cow with 2 legs? Your mom.

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why don’t emos live alone?they like to hang with their freinds.

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What has 4 wheels 2 legs and loves his shoulder Stephen hawking

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To whoever has my voodoo doll, please hold its hand.

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When the emo kid hangs himself and the autistic kid thinks that it’s a pinata… BATTER UP TO THE PLATE!

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What do you call when a friend calm his suicidal friend? Hang in there buddy

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I could never forget my grandfathers last words. “Stop shaking the ladd-”

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I went to visit my friends sick grandpa. He was lying in a hospital bed connected to a lot of tubes. When I approached him he kept repeating “Ni caizhe wo de yangqi guan” Suddenly right in front of me, he passed. Later that night I translated his last words, and they were “You’re standing on my oxygen tube”

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