What do you call when a friend calm his suicidal friend? Hang in there buddy
Life is like a penis simple,soft,relaxed,and hanging free.until a woman comes around and makes it hard
Me having a good day Going on a walk on a peaceful day* my depression: hey whats up! Me: go away. My depression: well how rude. Me: ??. My depression: remeber that one tim… Me: no, dont even. My depression: that we… Me: nope. My deprssion: says really fast:said that one stupid joke that wasnt funny and everybody just stared at you, and then you spilt water all over yourself and it looked like you peed yourself. And you went home and cried yourself to sleep just like yoy do every single night. Me: ??????. My depression: ?? dont worry I’ll always be here for you.
My neck, my back, my crippling anxiety attacks
Bought my son a trampoline for his birthday, the ungrateful f@cker just sat in his wheelchair and cried
They say string theory is hanging on by a thread.
A man walks into the library. “Hello ma’am I’d like to borrow a book about committing suicide” The librarian replies, “No,you won’t give it back”
Yo mama is so ugly, her portraits hang themselves.
What’s the difference between a baby and an onion ? One cries when you peel its skin off, the other makes you cry when you peel its skin off.
Suicide is never the answer Suicide is the question The answer is yes
When the people that see u Cry that doesn’t mean they miss u That mean they scared of yo Onion breath????
Just all us depressed people joking about our depressed lives, we should hang out sometime
Me and my grandpa went on a road trip and he died that was the last thing we did together and I will never forget his last words “WAKE UP YOU DUMBASS”
Once i was walking along the beach and there was a girl with no arms or legs there, i walked by and she said excuse me, will you touch me ive never been touched before, i was like okay so i touched her, i kept on walking along and there was the same girl, she said sir will you kiss me, i went alright so i went up and kissed her, i thought that was weird but anyway i kept walking along and there she was again, she said sir will you f@ck me? I went okay so i picked her up and threw her in the ocean and went YOUR f@ckED NOW
Most people think an octopus has 8 legs. Actually, they have 6 legs and 2 arms. How can you tell which are the arms? Hit it on the head. The two that go up to the head when he says “Owwww” are his arms.
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