Kid: hey dad whats dark humor ? Dad: go walk up to that homeless guy and throw a rock at him . Kid: but dad I dont have any legs or arms . Dad: exactly son.
Last words of the captain of the Titanic… Where’s all this water come from??
911 what’s your emergency Me, my grandma just passed out in the living room and I think she’s dead Well it’s not a living room any more Me, hangs up Whats worse than 1000 dead babies hanging off a tree? 1 dead baby hanging of 1000 trees
Why do trees never call emo kids? The emos always hang up on them.
I wanna be a Christmas decoration cause they always do be hanging
Why is sex like math? You add a bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs, and pray there’s no multiplying.
a depressed kid tried to give a tree high-five but the tree left him hanging People at my school have started to wear Logan Paul merch. I try to give them a high five, but they always leave me hanging.
Sex is like math. Subtract the clothes, Add the bed, Divide the legs, and pray to God there is no multiplying.
why did the depressed person cross the road. to get ran over.
A man walks to the window and opens it and pulls out his phone and takes a photo. “One more picture and I’ll jump.” He takes another photo and shuts the window. “I can’t jump, you’re not supposed to throw trash out the window.”
Once I saw A girl crying and asked where are your parents; God I love working at orphanages.
my dad said ill get the milk but he forgot i was i his car
Me: Wanna play 9/11? Friend: What’s that? Me: Its a game where I kick you in both legs and watch you fall.
I walked into the kitchen and saw my wife chopping up onions which made me cry. Onions was a good dog.
The most powerful thing in the world is babies. This is because they cry and get what every they want.
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