Dark Humor

A pirate walked into a bar with his ship’s steering wheel hanging off his pants. The bartender says, “Hey! What’s with the steering wheel?” The pirate says, “I don’t know but it’s driving me nuts! ” I got detention yesterday because I told the emo kid to “Hang in there.”

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Lets make a joke on how depressing monday is to ignore how depressing everyday is.

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I wanna be a Christmas decoration cause they always do be hanging

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I’ll never forget my bosses last words: " We shall serve the best meat in our burgers! "

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If I was a party, then anxiety must be the cousin depression felt obligated to bring to the party and insomnia the little annoying sibling.

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There’s a man in Florida with no arms or legs who is armed and on the run

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I’ll never forget my sister’s last word. “Is it edible?”

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They say I’ll mess up my insides, but I don’t have any.

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What’s the difference between a coat hangerband an emo? Nothing that both hang

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What do you call a man off the ground? Hanged.

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What happened when the emo kid tried to high 5 a tree? It left him hanging

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Me: Calls 9-1-1 Operator: 9/11 what’s your emergency? Me: hangs up

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i remember my moms last words before her divorce, did you just load in me.

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i will always remember my grandfather’s last words before he died: is that a real chainsaw?

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If you were a food what would you be? Friend 1-Pizza cause I’m so cheesy Friend 2-Chocolate chip cookie cause I have lots of friends Me-donut cause I’m so empty inside

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