What’s the difference between a baby and an onion ? One cries when you peel its skin off, the other makes you cry when you peel its skin off.
did you fall from heaven? or did you fall from the cliff up there?
A depressed boy went to high five a tree guess what the tree did? The tree left him hanging
If you ever feel depressed, drink some coffee. Expresso Expresso, no more depresso!
“Go big or go home”, that’s what some people say. “Go loud and proud”, that’s what other people say. “Go out with a big, loud bang!”, that’s what I say.
I remember grandpas last words “oh shit it’s in drive”
What’s the hardest line to draw in a hospital? * … A FLATLINE!
How do you get a depressed person out of a tree? You cut the rope…
Friend 1:Eyyy gurl Me:Hey! (Fake smile) Friend 2:hey g-guys what "bout we play would you rather? 6 hours later Friend 2:So (name) would u rather? 1.“Hang” out with me Or 2.“Jump” 1 times? Me…e-eh?..Why not both???we could just "Jump while “Hanging” out right?
what do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn’t matter whutcha call him he ain’t comin’
why did the kid cry? his dad didn’t get the milk
what fell down the tree first the emo or the apple guess what the apple because the emo got left hanging
knock knock whos their boo boo who well you dont have to cry about it gary
Person: where do i commit sucide Dog: roof Person: good idea
What do you call a cow with no legs Ground beef…haha…no one likes my jokes
RUS | ENG
