Dark Humor

Orphans are the best targets for bullying, since who they gonna cry too? their parents?

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I’ll always remember my father’s last words: I’m gonna sleep for a little.

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3 men walk into heaven at the same time. they all live in the same city. god asks the first man “how did you die?” the man says “I have a heart condition and iv’e been suspecting my wife of cheating for some time. anyway I get how from work and I see my wife on the bed and a man hang of the balcony. I get so mad and stomp on the guys fingers! he falls into a bush so I throw a refrigerator on him.” God asks the next man “how did you die?” the man says I was cleaning the windows and then this crazy man starts stomping on my fingers! luckily I fall safely in a bush! but then a refrigerator falls on me! " god asks the third man he says" I was the one in the fridge!"

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why does a movie set say break a leg? because they have a CAST

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Crucifixion - only one guy who nailed it… at least Jesus didn’t get screwed over, but I bet he was pretty cross about being forced to hang around.

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Me: Man I wish my clothes were emo. Friend:Why? Me:so they would hang themselves

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“I wasn’t that drunk yesterday.” “Oh boy you took the shower head in your arms and told it to stop crying.”

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If I went to walmart, I would be able to scan my own wrists because they’re barcodes too.

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I will remember my biker buddies last words ?Why did you cut in front of me?.

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