My dad, unfortunately, passed away when we couldn’t remember his blood type… His last words to us were, “Be positive!”
The only time you see a depressed person lifted up - when they hang themselves.
Little Johnny’s sister Suzy sees her mom in the shower and asks what is that between your legs? Her mom responds, “That is my garage”. The next day Suzy sees her dad in the shower and says, “What is that between your legs?” Her dad answers, “It is a motorcycle that gets parked in mommy’s garage.” The next day Suzy came to dinner with blood all over her hands. Her mom asks, “Why is there blood all over your hands Suzy?” Suzy says, " Well… little Johnny tried to put his motorcycle in my garage so I ripped its wheels off."
what do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn’t matter whutcha call him he ain’t comin’
This whole page is pure trash. f@ck all of you.
i will never forget my little brothers last word rip. his last words: paint dosent taste good
I still remember my grandpas last words Stop shaking the damn ladder
So there’s a little girl playing hopscotch at the front of her house while her mother hangs up the washing and her father mows the lawn. She says “Step on a crack and you break your mother’s back,”. The father laughs, until his daughter steps on a crack resulting in her mother’s back breaking. The little girl’s father looks in terror, she then says “step on a line and you break your father’s spine,”. The father closes his eyes waiting for his spine to break, but nothing happens. When he opens his eyes again he sees that he is ok, and nothing has happened to him. Suddenly he hears someone yell out “OW MY SPINE, ”. The father runs around the corner to see the mailman laying on the floor.
I’ll always remember my dads last words… Why do you have an axe we live in the city
My grandfather said we rely on technology too much so I unplugged his life support. Luckily I remember his last words . “You little bastard!”
where do you find a dog with no arms or legs -where you left it
Me: want to play 911 My little brother: what’s that Me: It’s where i kick your legs and you fall
Why did Billy not like the soccer ball he got for Christmas?.. He has no legs…
Me: Man I wish my clothes were emo. Friend:Why? Me:so they would hang themselves
A man is walking on the deck of a cruise ship, when he sees a woman, without arms and legs, crying. The man says “What’s wrong?” The woman says “I’ve never been hugged before.” So, the man gives her a hug and walks away. The next day, the man sees the woman, on the deck, crying again. The man says “What’s wrong, now?” The woman says “I’ve never been kissed before.” So, the man gives her a kiss and walks away. The next day, the same thing occurs. The man says “Oh, for Christ’s sake! What’s wrong, this time?!” The woman says “Well, I’ve never been f@cked before.” So, the man picks her up, throws her into the ocean, and yells “YOU’RE f@ckED!”
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