Dark Humor

are you sad then don’t be sad because sad backwards is das and das no good.

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Little Johnny’s mom is taking a shower little Johnny walks in and asks what is that in between your legs mommy says that is my keyhole the next day little Johnny sees his dad taking a shower and little Johnny asks what is that in between your legs daddy says that is my key the next day little Johnny says to his dad looks like the neighbor has the key to mommy’s keyhole too. By:Xzavier

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I wish i could be as visible as my depression is. My future is so bright, i need a flashlight to see where i’m going

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Is Depression an emotion or a state of mind? I call it a lifestyle

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The teacher asked her student to say the alphabet , The student recited the alphabet abcdefghijklmnoqrstuvwxyz, Where’s the p, He looked down to the floor and said : it’s running down my legs

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my sons so ungrateful. i bought him a trampoline and all he does is sit in his wheelchair and cry all day.

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Suicide is never the answer Suicide is the question The answer is yes

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what did the rope and the tree say to the kid do you want to hang later

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I remember grandpas last words “oh shit it’s in drive”

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A wife decided to leave for a vacation, leaving her husband in supervision of her mother and her cat. After a few days, she called her husband and asked, “How is everything going?” He responded with, “The cat is dead.” She cried out and said, “Why couldn’t you’ve broken the new slowly? You could have said the cat is playing on the roof or on the first day, and the next say it broke its leg, then the next that the poor things dead! Anyways, how’s my mom?” “She’s playing on the roof.”

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Why does sumo wrestlers shave their legs? Because they don’t want to be mistaken as feminists

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What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground Beef.

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Friend #1: “Yo guys, what’s the most unfair game you’ve ever played? For me it’s Fortnite.” Friend #2: “I’d have to say Monopoly.” Me: “The most unfair game you say? Life, definitely. Like, no one wins, it’s a one-way game.” Friend #2: “Uhh…that’s not exactly what he meant…” Friend #1: calls the suicide hotline

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What does my head and hell have in common? They both have demons in them

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Why dose a milking stool have 3 legs? Because, the cow has the utter one.

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