Dark Humor

I’ll never forget my father’s last words… Oh f@ck, it’s a bus!

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I went to visit my friends sick grandpa. He was lying in a hospital bed connected to a lot of tubes. When I approached him he kept repeating “Ni caizhe wo de yangqi guan” Suddenly right in front of me, he passed. Later that night I translated his last words, and they were “You’re standing on my oxygen tube”

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What’s the similarity between a broken pencil and my life? They’re both pointless.

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My mom always said garlic powder makes everything better so i sprinkled some on my divorce papers and my wifes broken leg.

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The last words my Dad spoke before he passed was, “Honey put down the knife we were only talking about getting a divorce.”

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I’ll never forget my aunt’s last words before she died “can you stop shaking the latter please”

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I wish my hair was depressed Cause then it would cut itself

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What do you call a dog with no legs… My asian neighbors dinner. 

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Orphan boy:Your dad is probably dissapointed of you i mean look at you Me: well at least my parents kept me wheres yours

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Kid: hey dad whats dark humor ? Dad: go walk up to that homeless guy and throw a rock at him . Kid: but dad I dont have any legs or arms . Dad: exactly son.

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“Oh waiter! Waiter!” “Yes sir?” “Do you have frog’s legs?” “Why yes” “Good. Now hop along and get me a steak!”

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I will never forget my Grandpa’s last words, “What are you doing with that rope and saw”

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Bro I love hanging out with white people, its either we play Yahtzee Or We Playin Nazi

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why don’t emos live alone?they like to hang with their freinds.

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Where you left it.

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