Why can’t depressed people leave the maze? Because their lives are the walls and they are to scared to meet the exit.
A blonde girl walks into a gym and sees a guy. The guy takes off his shirt she says “Oh what chest!” " That’s 100 lbs of dynamite, baby." Then he takes off his pants she says “Oh what legs!’’ He says “That 100 lbs of dynamite, baby.” After that, he took off his underwear. The blonde girl starts running he catches her and says “Why were you running? ” She said I didn’t wanna be in there once I’ve seen how small the fuse was.”
Why do orphans become criminals? To know what it’s like to be Wanted. Why are orphans bad at poker? They don’t know what a full house is. I saw a child crying yesterday so I asked him where his parents were. Bad move. I got fired from my job at the orphanage. What do you call an orphan’s family reunion? Me time. Did you know? The letter ‘f’ in orphan stands for family. What is an orphan’s least favorite song? We are Family. What’s an orphan’s least favorite tv show? Family Guy. What’s an orphan’s least favorite movie? Meet the Parents. What’s an orphan’s least favorite type of music? House. Next: Inappropriate Jokes What’s an orphan’s least favorite store? Home Depot. What’s an orphan’s favorite band? Foster the People. What do you call a virgin from Alabama? An orphan. Where do orphan chickens end up? Foster Farms What beer do orphans drink? Foster’s. Why do orphans have water with their cereal? Because their dad never came back with the milk. What do you call a fish with no parents? An orfin Why do orphans like playing tennis? Because it’s the only love they get. Me: Are you an orphan? Orphan: Yes, what gave me away? Me: Your parents.
What was Steven Hawking’s last words? The windows xp log out sound
I will always remember my uncle’s last words, “What’s The Shovel For?”
My mom always said garlic powder makes everything better so i sprinkled some on my divorce papers and my wifes broken leg.
What did the rope say to me? “hey there man, you wanna hang later?”
life’s too short to want it.
What do you call a cow that has two legs shorter on one side of its body compared to the other? LEAN BEEF!
what did the rope and the tree say to the kid do you want to hang later
a man walks into a bar, and notices a steak hanging from the ceiling. when he asks the bartender about it, the bartender says “If you can jump up and hit it, drinks are on the house for the night, but if you miss, everyone’s drinks are on your tab for the next two hours. Do you want to try? ” the man decided not to take the risk. he thought the steaks where too high.
I’ll never forget my sister’s last word. “Is it edible?”
What do emos and apples have in common? They both hang on trees.
What do you call a pig with no legs? A groundhog.
what game does an emo love hang man
RUS | ENG