Therapist: So how depressed would you say you’ve been feeling lately? Me: I don’t care anymore if my foot hangs over the bed where a monster can get it Therapist [whispering]: Jesus, wow
Whats Big, bounces, and make little kids cry? my donation to the orphanage :)
This whole page is pure trash. f@ck all of you.
Knock Knock! Who’s their? It’s Dave! Dave Who? *Dave proceeds to break down crying at the realization that his grandmother’s Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she no longer remembers him.
If I was a party, then anxiety must be the cousin depression felt obligated to bring to the party and insomnia the little annoying sibling.
You use your legs as support you count on your fingers
Everything dissapers in the Bermuda triangle Except my depression Dark jokes are like water some people just don’t get it
Me: Man I wish my clothes were emo. Friend:Why? Me:so they would hang themselves
Little jonny waked in on his mom in the shower and said what’s that on your chest mom: those are my head lights oh what’s that in between your legs mom: oh that’s my bush jonny: oh OK next he waked in on his dad in the shower he said dad what’s that in between your legs dad: oh that’s my snake jonny: oh OK that night little jonny walks in on his parents going at it and said " mom turn on his head lights there’s a snake Going in your bush
I was crying at school telling my friends my grandpa died, And they asked me what his last words were. His last words were “Are you still holding the ladder?”
What’s the similarity between a Christmas ornament and a person? They both hang…
Whats the difference batween an onion and a baby. One makes you cry when you cut it up
The most powerful thing in the world is babies. This is because they cry and get what every they want.
What do you say to your sister when she’s crying? – “Are you having a crisis?”
Yo mama is so ugly, her portraits hang themselves.
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