Dark Humor

Why can’t depressed people leave the maze? Because their lives are the walls and they are to scared to meet the exit.

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Me: want to play 911 My little brother: what’s that Me: It’s where i kick your legs and you fall

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When the people that see u Cry that doesn’t mean they miss u That mean they scared of yo Onion breath????

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What’s the difference between the real Jesus and a picture of him ? It only takes one nail to hang up the picture.

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I’ve looked everywhere… I just can’t seem to find where I left my will to live

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What do you call a person with no arms or legs at your front door? Mat

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i will always remember my grandfather’s last words before he died: is that a real chainsaw?

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It’s ironic that the more other people love you the more you hate yourself.

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I got a handjob of a blind woman the other day she said its the biggest thing i ever had in my hand i said no love your just pulling my leg

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What has two legs but can’t walk? Pants ??

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What is the difference between a Old Chest and a kid? One doesn’t cry when you drop it in the basement.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn’t matter, he won’t come anyway.

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I don’t call it suicide. I call it population control

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whats the difference between onions and babys? i cry when i cut onions.

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Therapist: So how depressed would you say you’ve been feeling lately? Me: I don’t care anymore if my foot hangs over the bed where a monster can get it Therapist [whispering]: Jesus, wow

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