What do you call Amber Heard crying during the lawsuit? A DEPPression. (If you are a fan of either Johnny Depp or Amber Heard, you might get the joke)
Me: Man I wish my clothes were emo. Friend:Why? Me:so they would hang themselves
(Just a joke) when Stephen Hawking fell over and hurt his leg, his dad said " It’ll get better just walk it off."
i will always remember my grandfathers last words “ill just check if its poisonous”.
Sometimes i get jealous when my phone dies
What did Steven Hawlkings last words? Error 404 File Not Found
I’ll never forget my Grandads last words…SON WHERE DID U GET A GRENADE FROM?!
grandfathers last words :Stop shaking the ladder you cunt Grandmother last words : you know how to use that hammer Dads last words : Always aim before you shoot that gun Moms last words : Turn of the stove when you’re done My last thought : am I a murder
Me: Calls 9-1-1 Operator: 9/11 what’s your emergency? Me: hangs up
Me: Mom I’m tired Mom:then go to sleep Me: No you don’t understand-
How many emos does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None they just sit in the dark and cry.
If you were a food what would you be? Friend 1-Pizza cause I’m so cheesy Friend 2-Chocolate chip cookie cause I have lots of friends Me-donut cause I’m so empty inside
I started crying when my mom was cutting up onions Onions was a good dog
There once was a little girl named Sarah with no arms and legs. knock knock Who’s there! Not Sarah.
So sad when the emo kid tried to give a high five to a tree To bad he left him hanging
RUS | ENG