Dark Humor

Little Johnny’s mom is taking a shower little Johnny walks in and asks what is that in between your legs mommy says that is my keyhole the next day little Johnny sees his dad taking a shower and little Johnny asks what is that in between your legs daddy says that is my key the next day little Johnny says to his dad looks like the neighbor has the key to mommy’s keyhole too. By:Xzavier

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my sons so ungrateful. i bought him a trampoline and all he does is sit in his wheelchair and cry all day.

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Are you suicide, cause you’re always on my mind

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What do you call a prostitute with no arm or legs Cash and carry

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Why did the noble gas cry? Because all his friends Argon.

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My grandad broke his legs. To cheer him up i bought him a walkman

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What’s the difference between a coat hangerband an emo? Nothing that both hang

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Therapist: So how depressed would you say you’ve been feeling lately? Me: I don’t care anymore if my foot hangs over the bed where a monster can get it Therapist [whispering]: Jesus, wow

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“I wasn’t that drunk yesterday.” “Oh boy you took the shower head in your arms and told it to stop crying.”

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I still remember the last words my grandpa said before he kicked the bucket. He said, “Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?”

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There once was a little girl named Sarah with no arms and legs. knock knock Who’s there! Not Sarah.

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I’ll never forget my brother’s last words: “Why is there a revolver in your hand?”

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What do suicidal people do in their spare time? Hang out.

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Stephen hawkings last words were the windows closing sound

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Why did the sea cry ? Because it felt salty and blue

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