I’ll never forget my bosses last words: " We shall serve the best meat in our burgers! "
Whats the difference between a baby and an onoin? The baby cries when I cut it but an onion makes me cry when I cut it.
did you fall from heaven? or did you fall from the cliff up there?
Kid:what is between moms legs? Dad:paridise. Kid whats between you legs? Dad:the key to paridise. Kid:well uou better change the lock the neighbor has the key to.
What’s the difference between a coat hangerband an emo? Nothing that both hang
Crucifixion - only one guy who nailed it… at least Jesus didn’t get screwed over, but I bet he was pretty cross about being forced to hang around.
The depressed kid went to high five the tree… but the tree left them hanging… Children are like a box of Christmas decorations. I keep ‘em in my basement until it’s time to hang ‘em from a tree.
I wanna be a Christmas decoration cause they always do be hanging
A pirate walked into a bar with his ship’s steering wheel hanging off his pants. The bartender says, “Hey! What’s with the steering wheel?” The pirate says, “I don’t know but it’s driving me nuts! ” I got detention yesterday because I told the emo kid to “Hang in there.”
What is the difference between a Old Chest and a kid? One doesn’t cry when you drop it in the basement.
Whats the difference between a school bus and my Dad’s van? Schools buses usually don’t have screaming and crying children
I fear my last words will be ‘‘hold my beer and watch this.’’
I’ll never forget my dad’s last words. “Erase my search history, son.”
I wont ever Forget my dads last words: “OH GOD THE POLICE!!!”
one time i broke up with my roblox girlfriend by sending her a message, 30 seconds later i heard my uncle crying in the next room
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