Dark Humor

I’ll never forget my father’s last words… Oh f@ck, it’s a bus!

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What was stephan Hawkins last words\windows10shutting down

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If I went to walmart, I would be able to scan my own wrists because they’re barcodes too.

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The last words my Dad spoke before he passed was, “Honey put down the knife we were only talking about getting a divorce.”

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I tried to high five a tree, but it just left me hanging.

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Whats Big, bounces, and make little kids cry? my donation to the orphanage :)

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What do you call a Chinese man with one leg? Tie won shu

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WAIT! I remember how the joke goes! These two cannibals i hanging out eat lunch, which is a clown you see, cause there cannibals and one cannibal says to the other cannibal "Does this taste funny to you?

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grandfathers last words :Stop shaking the ladder you cunt Grandmother last words : you know how to use that hammer Dads last words : Always aim before you shoot that gun Moms last words : Turn of the stove when you’re done My last thought : am I a murder

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Paddy and Seamus work at the Guinness factory and Seamus has a horrible accident and dies at work. Paddy agrees to tell Seamuswife the bad news. He knocks on the door and Seamus wife answers. " Whats happened Paddy?" Paddy frowns. " Im sorry to say poor Seamus fell into the Guinness vat and drowned, im so sorry." She started to cry and asked paddy: " Did he at least die quickly? " Seamus shook his head, " No, he got out 3 times for a pee."

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Little jonny waked in on his mom in the shower and said what’s that on your chest mom: those are my head lights oh what’s that in between your legs mom: oh that’s my bush jonny: oh OK next he waked in on his dad in the shower he said dad what’s that in between your legs dad: oh that’s my snake jonny: oh OK that night little jonny walks in on his parents going at it and said " mom turn on his head lights there’s a snake Going in your bush

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What is the difference between a sloth and a depressed kid? A sloth doesn’t need a rope to hang

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i went to a butcher house with my little cousin and seen a baby pig and told her look its pepa pig she started crying

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one time i broke up with my roblox girlfriend by sending her a message, 30 seconds later i heard my uncle crying in the next room

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what’s the difference between an onion and a baby? nobody cries when you cut up the baby.

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