If I was a party, then anxiety must be the cousin depression felt obligated to bring to the party and insomnia the little annoying sibling.
Chuck Norris doesn’t turn on his shower, he just stares at it until it cries
A emo texted a tree wanna hang out… The tree ghosted her
A man woke up in a hospital after a serious accident. He yelled, "Doctor! Doctor! I can’t feel my legs!" The Doctor replies, “I know, I amputated your arms.”
“Go big or go home”, that’s what some people say. “Go loud and proud”, that’s what other people say. “Go out with a big, loud bang!”, that’s what I say.
what was my great grandpas last words SHIT MG42!!!
When i was at work i say this kid crying i said where are your parents. God i love working in a orphanage
I have an auntie who has no arms and no legs. She is my dad’s half sister.
“Boom, quick; you have five seconds to give me three reasons to live.” “1…2…3 ……4…5…” Did you noticed you said nothing at all?
I remember my grandfathers last words: Are you holding the ladder
Why didnt Logan Paul high five the asain man…because he loves to leave asains hanging
What do you call a pig with no legs? A groundhog.
What happened when the emo kid tried to high 5 a tree? It left him hanging
Me having a good day Going on a walk on a peaceful day* my depression: hey whats up! Me: go away. My depression: well how rude. Me: ??. My depression: remeber that one tim… Me: no, dont even. My depression: that we… Me: nope. My deprssion: says really fast:said that one stupid joke that wasnt funny and everybody just stared at you, and then you spilt water all over yourself and it looked like you peed yourself. And you went home and cried yourself to sleep just like yoy do every single night. Me: ??????. My depression: ?? dont worry I’ll always be here for you.
why do we tell actors to break a leg … so they can get in the cast!
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