What’s the difference between a man and a table. The table doesn’t cry when I break it’s legs
I started crying when dad was cutting onions. Onions was such a good dog.
Q: What did one emo kid say to the other emo kid? A: Wanna hang out?
What do emos and apples have in common? They both hang on trees.
What was Steven Hawking’s last words? ERROR 101
Me: Mom I’m tired Mom:then go to sleep Me: No you don’t understand-
why did the depressed person cross the road. to get ran over.
Once i was walking along the beach and there was a girl with no arms or legs there, i walked by and she said excuse me, will you touch me ive never been touched before, i was like okay so i touched her, i kept on walking along and there was the same girl, she said sir will you kiss me, i went alright so i went up and kissed her, i thought that was weird but anyway i kept walking along and there she was again, she said sir will you f@ck me? I went okay so i picked her up and threw her in the ocean and went YOUR f@ckED NOW
My memes are ironic but my depression is chronic.
what did the suicidal kid say to the tree? dont leave me hanging
my dad said ill get the milk but he forgot i was i his car
When you break up with your online girlfriend, and you hear your uncle crying in the other room.
What do you call a cow with two legs Answer: Your mom
Little jonny waked in on his mom in the shower and said what’s that on your chest mom: those are my head lights oh what’s that in between your legs mom: oh that’s my bush jonny: oh OK next he waked in on his dad in the shower he said dad what’s that in between your legs dad: oh that’s my snake jonny: oh OK that night little jonny walks in on his parents going at it and said " mom turn on his head lights there’s a snake Going in your bush
I love Brussel sprouts more than I love myself
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