Hey can’t wait to meet you! So join the crippiling depression family!!
what’s the difference between an onion and a baby? nobody cries when you cut up the baby.
I will always remember my grandpa’s last words. SHIT, THE LADDER IS FALLING!
What has four legs and one arm? A rottweiler at a park. What do you say to a 1 legged hitch hiker? Hop in!
Person A: cmon person B, just be happy, smile Person B: over my dead body Person B: gets the noose
Life is like a penis simple,soft,relaxed,and hanging free.until a woman comes around and makes it hard
My neck, my back, my crippling anxiety attacks
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef. What do you call a cow with 3 legs? Lean beef. What do you call a cow with 2 legs? Your mom.
why do emos like circles because they can hang out with them
This whole page is pure trash. f@ck all of you.
There’s a man in Florida with no arms or legs who is armed and on the run
i saw a little kid crying yesterday, so i asked him where his parents were. God i love working at an orphanage
“Go big or go home”, that’s what some people say. “Go loud and proud”, that’s what other people say. “Go out with a big, loud bang!”, that’s what I say.
I cannot moderate myself at all. It’s either I don’t take my meds, or I take the entire bottle. Decisions decisions… Bleach solves so many problems, Staines, Dirty dishes, messes, and over population
Three guys are on a plane one is Asian, one is Mexican, and the other is an American, and the Pilot says “There is to much weight on the plane, you all need to throw something off.” So the Mexican threw out a burrito and said , “I have plenty of these where I come from,” the the Asian threw out some rice and said “I have plenty of these in my country,” The American threw out a bomb and said, “I have a lot of these in my country.” The plane crashes anyway and the three men start to walk away from the crash, as they were walking the found a boy crying they asked him what was wrong and he said, “A ton of Buritos fell out of the sky and got me all messy,” The men started walking away and soon enough they found another boy crying they asked him what was wrong and he said, “A ton of rice fell out of the sky and sherded all my clothes.” The guys knew who did it but avoided the trouble, they kept on walking and found a kid laughing so hard he was on the ground, and they asked what had been so funny the boy said, “MY GRANDPA FARTED AND THE HOUSE BLEW UP!!!”
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